I sort of understand your position - except that I have always been just as internet savvy as my computer engineer hubby.
We do HAVE to make a point of getting off of the computer and doing things out of the house together - we are both introverted and are very content to sit on our repsective laptops and surf the 'net all night. Not in seperate rooms though - on the couch, next to each other - and not while one is playing an intense role playing game, chatting up virtual strangers in forums, etc. We each have our own 'projects' that we do online - he looks up electrical and other hobby things, I look up activities for my daughter and chat on a mom's board (and surf SOMD
)
I don't think that the internet HAS to be a 'problem' any more than any other areas of a relationship. It's just what you make of it, and if it IS a problem for one person, then it needs to be addressed. However, my husband and I both spend hours online each night after our dd goes to bed, yet neither of us feel neglected or that anything needs to change. We are just fine with 'our' set-up and we both know that there is nothing going on via the 'net that shouldn't be
My ex was a golfer and a drinker, and I worried about him CONSTANTLY when it came to our relationship - if he was at a bar, chances are he was probably doing something that I didn't consider appropriate. My hubby never does anything that I would consider inappropriate on the 'net, so it's all relative. (and no I don't mind if he looks at porn once in a while - he is a guy after all, and darn it, sometimes *I* just need a break
)
I'd rather have my husband at home surfing the internet than out at a bar every night. I've 'experienced' both in relationships and the bar boy was 10 times more trouble. So I'd rather have my loser husband online for hours at a time than sitting at a bar somewhere, spending $$, watching sports game after sports game and drinking his umpteenth dollar draft
(sorry I do have issues when it comes to men/alcoholism/sports obviously - I'll freely admit it, that's why I married a nerd!!!
)
Long story short, what I'm trying to say is that I don't believe there is such a thing as *too* much time doing anything (internet included) as long as there are no problems from it. My husband and I don't police each other's internet usage - if he wants to be online for hours, I don't care, as long as it isn't interfering with other time I want to spend with him, us going somewhere, our sex life, etc. And I know he feels the same way.
edited for spelling
