become a mother, no matter the cost

libertytyranny

libertytyranny

Dream Stealer
So..I was watching a documentary about older women having babies..and really had a hard time digesting a 70 yo having a child, even the 60 year old...and then I found this article..

Woman Told to Abort Pregnancy or Die Chooses Death - ParentDish


They set it up as a courageous feel good story about a woman who chooses life..but once you get into the details..it struck me as stupid and selfish. Maybe I am being too hard-hearted, a recognized self failing..but why is this woman being praised? She tried to concieve, knowing she was ill and it was a risk, and then gave birth to a very premie baby with several severe health problems, and then promptly died. Who in the world did that help? I am not disagreeing with her choice to keep the child, rather than abort..I understand that..but why try so hard when the risks are so high?

Is it ok to try to concieve, no matter what the cost?
 
Beta84

Beta84

They're out to get us
I don't understand that at all. It's not worth ending her life for the chance of maybe creating another. We aren't required to have offspring and I don't think ending your life so a child can be born is very good for the child. People in those situations should maybe look for someone to carry the child if they're that intent on having one.
 
pearlie369

pearlie369

UnStAbLe YeT sAfE
I am on the the other side on this one. A) she didn't 'promptly' die she died 13 months later. B) I don't think anyone told her she would die before she got pregnant she was just considered 'high risk' like many, many other women. C) I don't think it is very selfish, she gave her life for her child's and left a caring father and grandmother in charge of looking after him for her.
I think having a child over the age of 40 is plain stupid, I know what I thought when there was a 65 year old mother at my graduation (umm, we know who the 'accident' child is there), and who will be there when the parents die in a few years? But, I don't think this woman was so wrong as to choose to have a child even though she was ill, she had a healthy partner of a decent age (I hope). I am one of the many that have been told they won't be able to have children. I do not want to pay anyone else to carry my child, it's my family not a business venture, and who is to say the person carrying it will take care of themselves and my child as I would hope and want them to? No having a child is not a requirement, but the hormones in us tend to disagree with you on that one no matter how much you repress it.
 
Christy

Christy

b*tch rocket
Nickel said:
Steel Magnolias. :jameo:
Click to expand...

Damn it! You beat me to the punch. :mad:

As far as the original question goes...

Is it ok to try to concieve, no matter what the cost?
Click to expand...

I think the cost has to be determined by each individual. It's not up to me or you to decide for anyone else what risk or what cost (financially or emotionally) is too high. :shrug:
 
pelers

pelers

Active Member
There seems to be a lot that is left unsaid in those articles. Was she told when she was trying to conceive that having a baby would kill her? Or was it 20 weeks in? Was she told it WOULD kill her, or that it was likely?

Was it even the pregnancy that actually killed her? I mean, if her diabetes was already so bad that she was on dialysis and kidney medication already...

I guess one way I could see this making sense would be if I knew I was sick and dying, I think I would probably want to leave something (bad phrasing there, I'm sure) behind. It's something I would have to have a serious talk with my husband about, and it would have to be something he really wanted as well. Him wanting it at least as much as I did, if not more.
 
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