uppity teenager

beerlover

beerlover

New Member
I have a thirteen year old son who has gotten a little bit too big for his britches lately. I know teenagers are often hard to deal with and I expect the usual rebellion and moods and all that. But he has been disrespecting his mother more and more lately and this morning he told her to "Shut the f'ing door". Only he said the whole word. She didn't do anything to him other than say "watch your mouth". I think that kind of disrespect calls for a bit more punishment. My first thought is to give him a punch in the stomach and tell him never to talk to my wife like that again. I know "back in the day" that's how it would have been handled, but times are different now. What kind of punishment would you dole out for this kind of thing? Restriction from TV/Computer/PlayStation? Restriction to his room? Belt whipping?
 
MysticalMom

MysticalMom

Witchy Woman
If one of my girls talked to me like that not only would they lose every THING and every PRIVILAGE they'd get a boatload of soap in the mouth and a smack in the lips.

P.S. No matter WHAT they did, I'd never hit my child with a fist or a belt.
 
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M

Mousebaby

Guest
My husband and I agree that it would be really hard not to :smack: that filthy mouth! Secondly, he would know under no uncertain terms that it would be said again or he would be in some serious trouble! JMHO! :wench:
 
itsbob

itsbob

I bowl overhand
beerlover said:
I have a thirteen year old son who has gotten a little bit too big for his britches lately. I know teenagers are often hard to deal with and I expect the usual rebellion and moods and all that. But he has been disrespecting his mother more and more lately and this morning he told her to "Shut the f'ing door". Only he said the whole word. She didn't do anything to him other than say "watch your mouth". I think that kind of disrespect calls for a bit more punishment. My first thought is to give him a punch in the stomach and tell him never to talk to my wife like that again. I know "back in the day" that's how it would have been handled, but times are different now. What kind of punishment would you dole out for this kind of thing? Restriction from TV/Computer/PlayStation? Restriction to his room? Belt whipping?
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If ANY of my kids ever said anything remotely similar to that to their mom, they would get the beating of their lives, and they know it, and it would come in a hurry, no chance for explanation.

I've actully spanked my children VERY little, but knowing that I will stops them from doing something that would result in my doing it again.

Disrespect to their mother is one of those unforgivable sins that they would pay dearly for.
 
oldman

oldman

Lobster Land
Had a step-son say that to me ONCE. I drug him out of the car and told him if he EVER said that to me again he's have to call the cops - after he got out of the hospital. He NEVER said it again although I'm sure he thought it a few times. To my way of thinking parents have to set themselves as the bosses, at least to the point of letting the kids know what they are expected to get away with. Saying that to any parent is something that needs to be shut down right now.
 
donbarzini

donbarzini

Well-Known Member
I would give him the Yellow Pages and tell him to look up the closest dentist as soon as he woke up.
 
CMC122

CMC122

Go Braves!
I'd have smacked him and then proceeded to take every valuable thing to him out of his room and to the thrift store.:yay:
 
Suz

Suz

33 yrs & we r still n luv
ocean733 said:
If I ever spoke like that to my parents, I would not be living to tell the story.
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If that isn't the hammer hitting the nail on the head I don't know what it is.
 
Cowgirl

Cowgirl

Well-Known Member
Beerlover, how have you disciplined him in the past? Did he just out of the blue sass you? There are other ways to show him that was wrong without beating him. :lmao: I would definitely say take away all priveleges though. Does he do chores? Kids need chores......
 
Penn

Penn

Dancing Up A Storm
ocean733 said:
If I ever spoke like that to my parents, I would not be living to tell the story.
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:yeahthat: In my home, growing up, that is just something that would never have been tolerated. Mom would have slapped me silly, and THEN I would have had to wait until dad got home for the rest of the story. :shutup:
 
M

Mousebaby

Guest
I remember when I got uppity with my mom when I was 15 or 16. She accused me of giving this guy money to go get me cigarettes and I hadn't done it and it was pissing me off that she thought I was lying so I got up in her face and called her a BIATCH!!! Next thing I knew I was on the floor with a fat, bloody lip! I never did it again! :lmao:
 
beerlover

beerlover

New Member
Cowgirl said:
Beerlover, how have you disciplined him in the past? Did he just out of the blue sass you? There are other ways to show him that was wrong without beating him. :lmao: I would definitely say take away all priveleges though. Does he do chores? Kids need chores......
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It has ranged from spankings to restrictions. The problem I have is that his mom babies him too much, and he isn't a baby any more. I tell her that babying him and allowing him to get away with things is doing NOTHING to prepare him for life as an adult. He does not do any chores at all. Nothing. I've tried to implement basics like dressing his bed every day (mom says he doesn't have time) emptying and/or loading the dishwasher (mom says it's just easier for her to do it - he hasn't done it once) yardwork like raking leaves or hauling wood (she says raking the leaves is a waste of time, etc.) She even wanted to let him get away with this with no punishment until I showed her these threads to convince her that most parents don't think it's even remotely O.K.

I took away all his electronic priveleges for 2 weeks and made it clear to him that if he ever said anything like that to her again, he and I would be going a few rounds in the back yard. That seems really light to me, but the wife thought even that was too much. I've tried to convince her that chores are NORMAL and HEALTHY for kids, but she just doesn't buy it. She never had to do chores as a kid, either. It always seems to turn out that when I punish him for legitimate bad behavior, she gets mad at me and says I'm just being mean and then I'M THE ONE IN THE DAMN DOGHOUSE!!!! Maybe you guys could add some comments to this thread directed at her and tell her how right I am and how wrong she is....
 
Cowgirl

Cowgirl

Well-Known Member
beerlover said:
It has ranged from spankings to restrictions. The problem I have is that his mom babies him too much, and he isn't a baby any more. I tell her that babying him and allowing him to get away with things is doing NOTHING to prepare him for life as an adult. He does not do any chores at all. Nothing. I've tried to implement basics like dressing his bed every day (mom says he doesn't have time) emptying and/or loading the dishwasher (mom says it's just easier for her to do it - he hasn't done it once) yardwork like raking leaves or hauling wood (she says raking the leaves is a waste of time, etc.) She even wanted to let him get away with this with no punishment until I showed her these threads to convince her that most parents don't think it's even remotely O.K.

I took away all his electronic priveleges for 2 weeks and made it clear to him that if he ever said anything like that to her again, he and I would be going a few rounds in the back yard. That seems really light to me, but the wife thought even that was too much. I've tried to convince her that chores are NORMAL and HEALTHY for kids, but she just doesn't buy it. She never had to do chores as a kid, either. It always seems to turn out that when I punish him for legitimate bad behavior, she gets mad at me and says I'm just being mean and then I'M THE ONE IN THE DAMN DOGHOUSE!!!! Maybe you guys could add some comments to this thread directed at her and tell her how right I am and how wrong she is....
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You're wrong mom!!!! He needs to do chores. Kids learn responsibility and pride. Nothing in life is free..he needs to learn that. We had to do lots of chores when we were growing up. My sister and I did laundry, cleaned the bathrooms, cleaned the kitchen, took care of the cats (food and litter), took care of all the outside animals (horses, sheep, goats, poultry), cleaned our rooms, and helped in the garden.

He should absolutely be at least cleaning his own room and helping out with the dishes or something like that. No wonder he is getting an attitude!!!
 
Sharon

Sharon

* * * * * * * * *
Staff member
PREMO Member
beerlover said:
It has ranged from spankings to restrictions. The problem I have is that his mom babies him too much, and he isn't a baby any more. I tell her that babying him and allowing him to get away with things is doing NOTHING to prepare him for life as an adult. He does not do any chores at all. Nothing. I've tried to implement basics like dressing his bed every day (mom says he doesn't have time) emptying and/or loading the dishwasher (mom says it's just easier for her to do it - he hasn't done it once) yardwork like raking leaves or hauling wood (she says raking the leaves is a waste of time, etc.) She even wanted to let him get away with this with no punishment until I showed her these threads to convince her that most parents don't think it's even remotely O.K.
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Is she convinced yet?

I can't believe he has no chores. Making his bed, doing yard work, and helping around the house when needed should be the least amount of work he does. After all, he lives there (for free) and will be unprepared for life on his own if he cannot do these basic tasks. Does Mom plan on supporting him totally the rest of his life?

I mean this in a nice way....Your wife needs a reality check and your son will never grow into manhood if momma keeps babying him and doing everything for him. I pity the woman who marries your son if momma keeps at this the way she's been raising him.

Good luck!
 
itsbob

itsbob

I bowl overhand
You're going to have one problem teenager on your hands unless you lay down the law, and later a worthless government teat sucking adult. Right now he thinks he doesn't have to work for anything, he can just ease on through life with everything given to him and being done for him.

He needs to make up his bed and clean his room, just out of pride and not wanting to live as an animal. I wouldn't even cosider that a chore, that doesn't aid the family just him. Chores are doing his part in helping the family. Cooking supper, washing dishes (at 13 he should be washing drying and putting away his own clothes too). Mowing the lawn, raking leaves, wahing the car he rides in.. These will all make him a better adult, and a better parent when it's his turn.

Another good reason for chores. Prepares him for the time he's going to be on his own, when he's a bachelor. He'll be more prepared to be on his own, will be self sufficient and won't marry the first woman that says hi to him so he'll have someone to take care of him.

Have him at LEAST do the chores around the house that will make him more capable of being on his own, and DON'T pay him for it!
 
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