Being that I don't have a lawyer, because Fritz currently has him so busy clearing his name, I'm going to post my Last Will and Testament here for preservation purposes.

It is my desire for this Will and Testament to remain in this forum for Internet eternity. It is my request that it will not be deleted because some pyscho like Baja, Pete and others made the thread such a mess that it had to be deleted in entirety, rather than cherry-picking their rants out of it individually.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last Will and Testament of Clem Shady

In the event of death:

Should I die while wandering around Lexington Park looking for Rosie's Place from being hit by a drunken cop just hours away from going on duty, or get beat to death by cops with batons while recording police brutality on my Trac-Phone, or from any other such ill-fate; I Clem Shady, being of sound mind, but poor health, and having no living heirs other than my Goldfish Adolf Fritzler, do hereby donate the entire sum of my savings and pension from the Saint Mary's County Trash Collectors Union, currently valued at $2,276,128.67 to the election campaign of any person willing to run against State's Attorney Richard Fritz.

A trust is to be created under the name of "Adolf Fritzler" and all proceeds from my estate are to maintained in said trust. John Mattingly or any other lawyer that has successfully practiced law before the Supreme Court is to be assigned to administer the trust fund.

Use of Trust Funds:

Funds from the Adolf Fritzler Trust may be used for campaign signs, TV commercials on Channel 95, "Vote the Rapist Out!" t-shirts, buttons, and mugs, and for employees to guard Internet Forums such as this from Fritz trolls pursuing election candidates. If a Fritz opponent is falsely indicted, then trust funds may be used for his legal defense.

Burial:

My body is to be prepared so that it will appear as if I am still alive and placed in a chair. My body and the chair are to be placed in front of the window of the room described below under the Special Provisions section of my will.

Special Provisions:

1. My sole heir, Goldfish Adolf Fritzler, will be rented an apartment, hotel room, or any such facility that affords him a view of Fritz arriving and leaving work each day. His room and water temperature will remain at a constant 78 degrees.

2. Adolf's bowl water will be changed daily with the same Deer Park Spring water that County employees drink each day.

3. Adolf will be fed only premium goldfish pellets, per directions of the food container.

4. Each day when Fritz and his staff arrive to work at 9 A.M, Adolf will receive a Goldfish snack. When Fritz and his staff leave work at 3 P.M, Adolf will receive another treat.

5. If Fritz leaves work early to play golf, Adolf gets two snacks.

6. If Fritz or his staff gives a drunk driver PBJ in exchange for a $5,000 donation, then Adolf gets three snacks.

7. If Fritz gives a major drug dealer Nolle Prosecution, or only two days in jail, then Adolf is to receive four snacks.

8. Should a candidate defeat Fritz, it is my request that a hooker Goldfish be purchased to accompany Adolf, and that he be moved into said new State's Attorney's office to live out his days. Lyle is to be fired, escorted from the building, and kept away from Adolf. Do not let him piss in Adolf's bowl.

9. My body may then be cremated and my ashes scattered in the waters of Saint Rapist's Island.

Specials Situations:

Should the cops or Fritz voters leave me alive but in a vegetable state, it is my demand that I be kept on life-support or receive any medical care required to keep me alive, but brain dead until I expire naturally. The logic being, if I'm still around, the Trash Collector's Union is still paying to help rid Saint Mary's County of Fritz.

I Clem Shady, under Forum Oath, do hereby attest that this is my Last Will and Testament.

Signed:

Clem Shady

Being that I don't have a lawyer, because Fritz currently has him so busy clearing his name, I'm going to post my Last Will and Testament here for preservation purposes.

It is my desire for this Will and Testament to remain in this forum for Internet eternity. It is my request that it will not be deleted because some pyscho like Baja, Pete and others made the thread such a mess that it had to be deleted in entirety, rather than cherry-picking their rants out of it individually.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last Will and Testament of Clem Shady

In the event of death:

Should I die while wandering around Lexington Park looking for Rosie's Place from being hit by a drunken cop just hours away from going on duty, or get beat to death by cops with batons while recording police brutality on my Trac-Phone, or from any other such ill-fate; I Clem Shady, being of sound mind, but poor health, and having no living heirs other than my Goldfish Adolf Fritzler, do hereby donate the entire sum of my savings and pension from the Saint Mary's County Trash Collectors Union, currently valued at $2,276,128.67 to the election campaign of any person willing to run against State's Attorney Richard Fritz.

A trust is to be created under the name of "Adolf Fritzler" and all proceeds from my estate are to maintained in said trust. John Mattingly or any other lawyer that has successfully practiced law before the Supreme Court is to be assigned to administer the trust fund.

Use of Trust Funds:

Funds from the Adolf Fritzler Trust may be used for campaign signs, TV commercials on Channel 95, "Vote the Rapist Out!" t-shirts, buttons, and mugs, and for employees to guard Internet Forums such as this from Fritz trolls pursuing election candidates. If a Fritz opponent is falsely indicted, then trust funds may be used for his legal defense.

Burial:

My body is to be prepared so that it will appear as if I am still alive and placed in a chair. My body and the chair are to be placed in front of the window of the room described below under the Special Provisions section of my will.

Special Provisions:

1. My sole heir, Goldfish Adolf Fritzler, will be rented an apartment, hotel room, or any such facility that affords him a view of Fritz arriving and leaving work each day. His room and water temperature will remain at a constant 78 degrees.

2. Adolf's bowl water will be changed daily with the same Deer Park Spring water that County employees drink each day.

3. Adolf will be fed only premium goldfish pellets, per directions of the food container.

4. Each day when Fritz and his staff arrive to work at 9 A.M, Adolf will receive a Goldfish snack. When Fritz and his staff leave work at 3 P.M, Adolf will receive another treat.

5. If Fritz leaves work early to play golf, Adolf gets two snacks.

6. If Fritz or his staff gives a drunk driver PBJ in exchange for a $5,000 donation, then Adolf gets three snacks.

7. If Fritz gives a major drug dealer Nolle Prosecution, or only two days in jail, then Adolf is to receive four snacks.

8. Should a candidate defeat Fritz, it is my request that a hooker Goldfish be purchased to accompany Adolf, and that he be moved into said new State's Attorney's office to live out his days. Lyle is to be fired, escorted from the building, and kept away from Adolf. Do not let him piss in Adolf's bowl.

9. My body may then be cremated and my ashes scattered in the waters of Saint Rapist's Island.

Specials Situations:

Should the cops or Fritz voters leave me alive but in a vegetable state, it is my demand that I be kept on life-support or receive any medical care required to keep me alive, but brain dead until I expire naturally. The logic being, if I'm still around, the Trash Collector's Union is still paying to help rid Saint Mary's County of Fritz.

I Clem Shady, under Forum Oath, do hereby attest that this is my Last Will and Testament.

Signed:

Clem Shady

sound mind, huh?

I got excited for a minute. :ohwell:

I got excited for a minute. :ohwell:

come to Nanny, sweetie. :poorbaby:

Being that I don't have a lawyer, because Fritz currently has him so busy clearing his name, I'm going to post my Last Will and Testament here for preservation purposes.

It is my desire for this Will and Testament to remain in this forum for Internet eternity. It is my request that it will not be deleted because some pyscho like Baja, Pete and others made the thread such a mess that it had to be deleted in entirety, rather than cherry-picking their rants out of it individually.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Last Will and Testament of Clem Shady

In the event of death:

Should I die while wandering around Lexington Park looking for Rosie's Place from being hit by a drunken cop just hours away from going on duty, or get beat to death by cops with batons while recording police brutality on my Trac-Phone, or from any other such ill-fate; I Clem Shady, being of sound mind, but poor health, and having no living heirs other than my Goldfish Adolf Fritzler, do hereby donate the entire sum of my savings and pension from the Saint Mary's County Trash Collectors Union, currently valued at $2,276,128.67 to the election campaign of any person willing to run against State's Attorney Richard Fritz.

A trust is to be created under the name of "Adolf Fritzler" and all proceeds from my estate are to maintained in said trust. John Mattingly or any other lawyer that has successfully practiced law before the Supreme Court is to be assigned to administer the trust fund.

Use of Trust Funds:

Funds from the Adolf Fritzler Trust may be used for campaign signs, TV commercials on Channel 95, "Vote the Rapist Out!" t-shirts, buttons, and mugs, and for employees to guard Internet Forums such as this from Fritz trolls pursuing election candidates. If a Fritz opponent is falsely indicted, then trust funds may be used for his legal defense.

Burial:

My body is to be prepared so that it will appear as if I am still alive and placed in a chair. My body and the chair are to be placed in front of the window of the room described below under the Special Provisions section of my will.

Special Provisions:

1. My sole heir, Goldfish Adolf Fritzler, will be rented an apartment, hotel room, or any such facility that affords him a view of Fritz arriving and leaving work each day. His room and water temperature will remain at a constant 78 degrees.

2. Adolf's bowl water will be changed daily with the same Deer Park Spring water that County employees drink each day.

3. Adolf will be fed only premium goldfish pellets, per directions of the food container.

4. Each day when Fritz and his staff arrive to work at 9 A.M, Adolf will receive a Goldfish snack. When Fritz and his staff leave work at 3 P.M, Adolf will receive another treat.

5. If Fritz leaves work early to play golf, Adolf gets two snacks.

6. If Fritz or his staff gives a drunk driver PBJ in exchange for a $5,000 donation, then Adolf gets three snacks.

7. If Fritz gives a major drug dealer Nolle Prosecution, or only two days in jail, then Adolf is to receive four snacks.

8. Should a candidate defeat Fritz, it is my request that a hooker Goldfish be purchased to accompany Adolf, and that he be moved into said new State's Attorney's office to live out his days. Lyle is to be fired, escorted from the building, and kept away from Adolf. Do not let him piss in Adolf's bowl.

9. My body may then be cremated and my ashes scattered in the waters of Saint Rapist's Island.

Specials Situations:

Should the cops or Fritz voters leave me alive but in a vegetable state, it is my demand that I be kept on life-support or receive any medical care required to keep me alive, but brain dead until I expire naturally. The logic being, if I'm still around, the Trash Collector's Union is still paying to help rid Saint Mary's County of Fritz.

I Clem Shady, under Forum Oath, do hereby attest that this is my Last Will and Testament.

Signed:

Clem Shady

:killingme That's going to be one fat gold fish! Long live Adolf Fritz!!

Soon?:yay:

Soon?:yay:

:killingme

being of sound mind

This is debatable.

This is debatable.

highly so.

All we can hope for is that this particular will enters probate very, very soon.

This is debatable.

So you're contesting my will?

:popcorn:

So you're contesting my will?

:popcorn:

Just pointing out the factor that would definitely be your best asset in a court defense is also going to work against your will holding up: Mentally Incompetent

So you're contesting my will?

:popcorn:

"Not only are we going to display what the record shows; were going to tell people what we think about it too!" :buddies:

Ken Shady, I have a response to this & any other thread you post...VOTE FRITZ IN 2010!!!

Well Clem I want you to know that in
the event of you untimely demise I will
visit the site of your buried remains
and bow my head and pee on your grave.:howdy:

:killingme That's going to be one fat gold fish! Long live Adolf Fritz!!

Adolf gets the best Fritz Food money can buy.

:popcorn:

Just pointing out the factor that would definitely be your best asset in a court defense is also going to work against your will holding up: Mentally Incompetent

Well, I don't really like to put my medical problems online, but the doc says I'm suffering from Fritzophrenia.

And the doc says with the right medications and the proper care that I should live long enough to see Fritz go down.

So I'm obviously not normal, but I'm far less Fritzoid than many other people in here. I'll refrain from mentioning names.

:popcorn:

Well, I don't really like to put my medical problems online, but the doc says I'm obviously not normal, but
with the right medications and the proper care that I should live long enough to see Fritz go down.

:popcorn:

So according to that ....You
plan on living a long time..........

So according to that ....You
plan on living a long time..........

Yes, barring some unforeseeable event such as getting jailed on a Friday night without my meds, but keep in mind our fates are not intertwined.

:popcorn:

Godwin's Law is supposed to take a while to be realized. It does not bode well when it occurs in the starting post. :coffee:


I'm far less Fritzoid than many other people in here.Don't put all your money on that one. You may be the only one here who cannot go more than one sentence without saying that name. Even your MPDs can do better than that.

Godwin's Law is supposed to take a while to be realized. It does not bode well when it occurs in the starting post. :coffee:


Don't put all your money on that one. You may be the only one here who cannot go more than one sentence without saying that name. Even your MPDs can do better than that.

You arrived kinda late today?

Down at Arlington protesting the funerals of dead soldiers again?

:popcorn:

You arrived kinda late today?Please stick to stalking only Fritz. Thanks.

Please stick to stalking only Fritz. Thanks.

Excuse me?

Who's always showing up in who's threads?

:popcorn:

Who's always showing up in who's threads?Good idea! You stop posting so many threads and I will stop showing up in them - along with your other "enemies" with their "pesky facts".

Good idea! You stop posting so many threads and I will stop showing up in them - along with your other "enemies" with their "pesky facts".

So much for that stalking accusation, er confession, huh?

:killingme

So much for that stalking accusation, er confession, huh?Here's the thing, Clem_Stupid: I read/respond for the laughs; I do not take you seriously in the least, as most do not. You are the one who has been Fritzed with your Fritzy obfritzion.

Twist that however you like, but this is not your Rag where you can distribute your one-sided vitriol ad nauseum.


Rock on with your failed self! :larry:

.

Go Towards The Light.........................

Go Towards The Light.........................

The traffic light?

:confused:

This proves it - he is nuts!

This proves it - he is nuts!

So tell me there, uh Tigerbuggy: if I'm crazy what do you call people that put the Fritz the rapist into office for three terms?

:popcorn:

I bet your brother wears a badge like that too!

my savings and pension from the Saint Mary's County Trash Collectors Union, currently valued at $2,276,128.67

Yet you still don't pay your bills. Looks like your word is as worthless as that rag you used to publish.

You know, somebody who doesn't pay their bills is on the same level as those POS drunk drivers you loved to humiliate. Wouldn't it be funny if the new owner of the rag put you and your psychosis on the front page?

Yet you still don't pay your bills. Looks like your word is as worthless as that rag you used to publish.

You know, somebody who doesn't pay their bills is on the same level as those POS drunk drivers you loved to humiliate. Wouldn't it be funny if the new owner of the rag put you and your psychosis on the front page?

Clem points and laughs at another one of the mental midgets that Vrai has to keep on Ritallin and babysit all day.

Do we need to put you in the time-out room again with Mikey?

Maybe rape. Fritz likes rape.

:killingme