I've watched 5 minutes of it and have burst into tears. This mom is completely over the top in disciplining her child. Hot sause and cold showers for lying and getting into trouble at school. She is going off on her 7 year old and the poor kid is crying hysterically. I couldn't take watching it anymore but I'd love to see Dr Phil hand this mom her a$$.

Hmmmm...talk to me in about 12-13 or so years. I'm thinking she has the right idea. :yay:

Hmmmm, I hadn't thought of cold showers.....

Hot sauce in the mouth is not an over the top punishment for lying. I don't do it but I sure wouldn't get upset that someone else would.

Hmmmm...talk to me in about 12-13 or so years. I'm thinking she has the right idea. :yay:

Must not work very good if she has to do it over and over again.

I've watched 5 minutes of it and have burst into tears. This mom is completely over the top in disciplining her child. Hot sause and cold showers for lying and getting into trouble at school. She is going off on her 7 year old and the poor kid is crying hysterically. I couldn't take watching it anymore but I'd love to see Dr Phil hand this mom her a$$.

What kind of trouble?

Cold showers and hot sauce?? And you think this is excess punishment? :lol:

Don't think the hot sauce idea would have worked with me. Always liked those hot cherry peppers out of the garden since I was a kid. Only one punishment when we were kids. The strap across your butt. The punishment always fit the crime. And it wasn't done in excess. Dad was always fair. You could also take the alternate punishment of grounding with no TV. :yikes: Always took the strap. And with 3 boys, and we weren't angels, my father was more than fair.

I'm all for creative punishment. My point is that this mom is doing the same things over and over again and keeps getting the same result. Obviously she needs to try something else because what she's doing isn't working.

Background on the kid is that he's adopted from Russia with his twin brother. Mom felt a connection with the brother and not this kid but took him because they were a package deal. The twin brother is shy and seeks approval from the parents and this kid is independent and the dominant twin.

Not sure what trouble the kid got into at school because he was crying so hard, I couldn't understand what he was saying. Whatever it was, the teacher told him to stop and he didn't. I agree that he needed to be punished for acting up at school and not listening to his teacher but apparently the hot sause and cold shower isn't enough of a deterrent to make him not act up.

Last year my 6 yr old got into trouble a few times at school for various reason ranging from not stopping talking when the teacher asked him to pushing a kid over backwards in the lunchroom and causing a knot on his head. My son's punishment fit each crime and this year, he's a different kid. He knows what will happen if he gets into trouble and he's modified his behavior. This kid on Dr Phil knows the punishment he will receive and he still does it. That says a lot on this mom's method of obedience for this kid. It's not working.

I've watched 5 minutes of it and have burst into tears. This mom is completely over the top in disciplining her child. Hot sause and cold showers for lying and getting into trouble at school. She is going off on her 7 year old and the poor kid is crying hysterically. I couldn't take watching it anymore but I'd love to see Dr Phil hand this mom her a$$.

OMG I would make you cry then I am a horrible mother :bawl: I give my kids hot sauce if they say bad words.

No cold shower though... that is interesting.

P.S.A. If you really wanna piss your kids off, if they wont stop arguing and fighting with each other... you set them on the couch and make them hold hands for 10 minutes :smile:

Cold showers and hot sauce?? And you think this is excess punishment? :lol:

Don't think the hot sauce idea would have worked with me. Always liked those hot cherry peppers out of the garden since I was a kid. Only one punishment when we were kids. The strap across your butt. The punishment always fit the crime. And it wasn't done in excess. Dad was always fair. You could also take the alternate punishment of grounding with no TV. :yikes: Always took the strap. And with 3 boys, and we weren't angels, my father was more than fair.

We've used the belt a few times and that seemed to get our point across. Now the threat of the belt gets the needed behavior from our boys, especially from me because they know Mom doesn't play around. :lol:

OMG I would make you cry then I am a horrible mother :bawl: I give my kids hot sauce if they say bad words.

No cold shower though... that is interesting.

P.S.A. If you really wanna piss your kids off, if they wont stop arguing and fighting with each other... you set them on the couch and make them hold hands for 10 minutes :smile:

I don't have a problem with the hot sause or cold showers. My point is that it's not working yet she keeps doing it, thinking she'd get a different result. It was more of a :banghead: reaction more than a "what a mean mom" reaction.

I don't have a problem with the hot sauce ... My point is that it's not working yet she keeps doing it, thinking she'd get a different result.

Maybe she should switch to Ivory soap instead. :lol:

OMG I would make you cry then I am a horrible mother :bawl: I give my kids hot sauce if they say bad words.

No cold shower though... that is interesting.

P.S.A. If you really wanna piss your kids off, if they wont stop arguing and fighting with each other... you set them on the couch and make them hold hands for 10 minutes :smile:

:lmao:

When my sister and I would fist fight, Mom would kick us out of the house. That took all the fun out of it and we would stop. :lol:

No one ever died from "a little bit of soap"... Ask Ralphie.

I'm all for creative punishment. My point is that this mom is doing the same things over and over again and keeps getting the same result. Obviously she needs to try something else because what she's doing isn't working.

Background on the kid is that he's adopted from Russia with his twin brother. Mom felt a connection with the brother and not this kid but took him because they were a package deal. The twin brother is shy and seeks approval from the parents and this kid is independent and the dominant twin.

Not sure what trouble the kid got into at school because he was crying so hard, I couldn't understand what he was saying. Whatever it was, the teacher told him to stop and he didn't. I agree that he needed to be punished for acting up at school and not listening to his teacher but apparently the hot sause and cold shower isn't enough of a deterrent to make him not act up.

Last year my 6 yr old got into trouble a few times at school for various reason ranging from not stopping talking when the teacher asked him to pushing a kid over backwards in the lunchroom and causing a knot on his head. My son's punishment fit each crime and this year, he's a different kid. He knows what will happen if he gets into trouble and he's modified his behavior. This kid on Dr Phil knows the punishment he will receive and he still does it. That says a lot on this mom's method of obedience for this kid. It's not working.

And you got all of that from five minutes and while the kids was crying hysterically?? OK

We've used the belt a few times and that seemed to get our point across. Now the threat of the belt gets the needed behavior from our boys, especially from me because they know Mom doesn't play around. :lol:

You beat your children with a belt, yet think hot sauce and cold showers are over the top?

Alrighty then.

We used to get our butt spanked with the orange hotwheels track. :bawl:

We used to get our butt spanked with the orange hotwheels track. :bawl:

:lol:

We used to get our butt spanked with the orange hotwheels track. :bawl:
:lmao: :lmao:

we had ninja spankings too, never know where/when/how its gonna happen

We used to get our butt spanked with the orange hotwheels track. :bawl:

Wow, I'll bet THAT hurt!

Wow, I'll bet THAT hurt!Like crazy! And if we were in shorts, the legs got it. Damn I wish I had behaved more.

Dad made us go break off a switch from the tree.. And it better had been a good one...

And you got all of that from five minutes and while the kids was crying hysterically?? OKI read her post in less than 1 minute. You must be slow, but that's okay. :huggy:



You beat your children with a belt, yet think hot sauce and cold showers are over the top?

Alrighty then.She said this twice...I don't have a problem with the hot sause or cold showers. My point is that it's not working yet she keeps doing it, thinking she'd get a different result. It was more of a :banghead: reaction more than a "what a mean mom" reaction.:shrug:



A little google (http://bit.ly/cFqFiJ) can go a long way (http://bit.ly/bY5wu6).

I think a little humiliation could work. Make them do yardwork while wearing a sandwich board that says, "This is my punishment for ________." :lol: Of course, certain courts have ruled such treatment "abusive" (:rolleyes:) so another approach may be necessary.

[QUOTE=hvp05;4443673]I read her post in less than 1 minute. You must be slow, but that's okay. :huggy:



I guess I should have quoted the first post also for people that have no reading retention. So here goes:

Today's Dr Phil
I've watched 5 minutes of it and have burst into tears. This mom is completely over the top in disciplining her child. Hot sause and cold showers for lying and getting into trouble at school. She is going off on her 7 year old and the poor kid is crying hysterically. I couldn't take watching it anymore but I'd love to see Dr Phil hand this mom her a$$.

I read her post in less than 1 minute. You must be slow, but that's okay.

No offense, but I think it's you that's slow, dude.
I've watched 5 minutes of it and have burst into tears.

She said this twice...

Hello?
This mom is completely over the top in disciplining her child. Hot sause and cold showers for lying and getting into trouble at school.

I watched it and I DO think she was over the top. The woman was a cold hearted biatch and that boy deserves better than that. She definitely had issues, and I really hope they do a follow up show.

.

P.S.A. If you really wanna piss your kids off, if they wont stop arguing and fighting with each other... you set them on the couch and make them hold hands for 10 minutes :smile:

Love it!!! :killingme

I watched it and I DO think she was over the top. The woman was a cold hearted biatch and that boy deserves better than that. She definitely had issues, and I really hope they do a follow up show.

Why do you feel that way - because the child was crying?

That's a real question, I didn't watch the show so can't make a judgment call. Also Larry's sister used to put a dab of hot sauce (Tabasco, not habanero) on her daughter's tongue when she was being lippy. This is when the child was maybe 3 or so. Didn't injure her, and I thought that was a very creative and effective punishment.

Why do you feel that way - because the child was crying?

That's a real question, I didn't watch the show so can't make a judgment call. Also Larry's sister used to put a dab of hot sauce (Tabasco, not habanero) on her daughter's tongue when she was being lippy. This is when the child was maybe 3 or so. Didn't injure her, and I thought that was a very creative and effective punishment.

Well, the child was crying, but it wasn't a "normal" I'm-in-trouble cry, it was a hysterical cry. The woman made him swish hot sauce in his mouth for several minutes, and the whole time the boy was doing the really hard cry where he couldn't catch his breath. She did the hot sauce because he lied about getting a warning in school. Then, because he got a warning (or two warnings?) in school, she made him get in the cold shower for several more minutes. He was sobbing uncontrollably at that point.

The real issue I had with her is that she said she wanted help and she knew her methods weren't working (because she was constantly having to punish the boy), but she didn't show one ounce of emotion. Not one tear or frown. She had a blank stare the entire time. She really acted like she didn't like the child at all and kept comparing him to his brother.

THe boy was adopted from Russia, so Dr. Phil offered testing (all kinds of testing, from heavy metal toxicity to mental disorders) to help this woman figure out if there is actually a problem/disease or if it was truly just behavioral.

IMO, the woman crossed the line between discipline and abuse. AND, if you keep doing the same punishment over and over with no change in behavior, maybe you should change your methods! It just seemed like it was a very angry household and I can't imagine that will help a 7 yr old adopted boy's behavior, especially if his adoptive mom is always causing him pain like that.

And don't think I'm saying kids shouldn't be punished. Obviously I don't think that, but this was over the top and it wasn't working.

Here's (http://www.drphil.com/shows/show/1545/) the link to the show in case anyone wants to see it.

Well, the child was crying, but it wasn't a "normal" I'm-in-trouble cry, it was a hysterical cry. The woman made him swish hot sauce in his mouth for several minutes, and the whole time the boy was doing the really hard cry where he couldn't catch his breath. She did the hot sauce because he lied about getting a warning in school. Then, because he got a warning (or two warnings?) in school, she made him get in the cold shower for several more minutes. He was sobbing uncontrollably at that point.

The real issue I had with her is that she said she wanted help and she knew her methods weren't working (because she was constantly having to punish the boy), but she didn't show one ounce of emotion. Not one tear or frown. She had a blank stare the entire time. She really acted like she didn't like the child at all and kept comparing him to his brother.

THe boy was adopted from Russia, so Dr. Phil offered testing (all kinds of testing, from heavy metal toxicity to mental disorders) to help this woman figure out if there is actually a problem/disease or if it was truly just behavioral.

IMO, the woman crossed the line between discipline and abuse. AND, if you keep doing the same punishment over and over with no change in behavior, maybe you should change your methods! It just seemed like it was a very angry household and I can't imagine that will help a 7 yr old adopted boy's behavior, especially if his adoptive mom is always causing him pain like that.

And don't think I'm saying kids shouldn't be punished. Obviously I don't think that, but this was over the top and it wasn't working.

Yep, you definitely had to watch it to see what I was talking about. I guess I should have waited to start the thread because it got a lot of responses based on the discipline instead of in the context of the show. Plus my initial post was hurried and not very detailed which caused the confusion as well.

Here's (http://www.drphil.com/shows/show/1545/) the link to the show in case anyone wants to see it.
Thanks!

I'm not excusing the woman's behavior BUT.....

I'm really annoyed by the Mommies of the World in the audience and their self-righteous blasting of this woman. Clearly doesn't know what else to do. Clearly she doesn't like what she *is* doing, or she wouldn't have sent the video to Dr. Phil. It would be nice for them to show her some constructive compassion.

I remember quite well getting so frustrated with my kids that I lost it. And you do have to tell them something repeatedly - I've never known a kid ever who stopped a behavior after being told or punished one time. I should have a nickel for every time I had to tell a kid to go brush their teeth, and PS, I'm going to smell their breath after so no faking. You have to keep on them and it is constant, no matter what punishment you dole out. Their brain hasn't fused yet and they have no real retention.

I don't know as I'd call what I saw with this woman "abuse". The child isn't physically injured, just uncomfortable. Sort of like waterboarding. :jet: But obviously she needs to learn better coping and discipline skills.

Her blank look tells me that she is a longtime represser of emotion - possibly a childhood abuse victim herself. Just from the clip, and even when she's punishing the kid, she seems uber-tight controlled, almost robotic - not out of control at all. So she needs deep therapy, not just one session on Dr. Phil, who's so smug and self-righteous he makes me want to fill his mouth with hot sauce and stick him in a cold shower.

We used to get our butt spanked with the orange hotwheels track. :bawl:

That's one my dad never thought of..and we had miles of that in our house. We got the metal end of the flyswatter.

one day, my grand-son was really bad in Home Depot. He was about 4 then. My son spanked him, right in the store. G-son was really embarrassed.
Well....G-son is 12 now. and to this day, all Ed has to do is say..."you bucking for another Home Depot beating?"
:roflmao:
I saw the show too, and I really didn't thing that the Mom was over the top.
Any kid will scream and cry at the drop of a dime. Mom was doing what she needed to do. JMHO

Her blank look tells me that she is a longtime represser of emotion - possibly a childhood abuse victim herself. Just from the clip, and even when she's punishing the kid, she seems uber-tight controlled, almost robotic - not out of control at all. So she needs deep therapy, not just one session on Dr. Phil, who's so smug and self-righteous he makes me want to fill his mouth with hot sauce and stick him in a cold shower.
Nah, she's an INTJ personality and no amount of therapy in the world will change that. You can tell by her thousand yard stare and the fact that she is trying to reason with a child. I seriously doubt she's an abuse victim.

I just wonder why she has so many kids. She doesnt' seem like the kind of Mommy that loves kids. :shrug:

Why do you feel that way - because the child was crying?

That's a real question, I didn't watch the show so can't make a judgment call. Also Larry's sister used to put a dab of hot sauce (Tabasco, not habanero) on her daughter's tongue when she was being lippy. This is when the child was maybe 3 or so. Didn't injure her, and I thought that was a very creative and effective punishment.

It's no wonder I'm a therapy. My mother put this awful hot stuff on my thumb and fingers on my right hand to keep me from sucking my thumb...I was about 4. Well, I picked my butt...

It's no wonder I'm a therapy. My mother put this awful hot stuff on my thumb and fingers on my right hand to keep me from sucking my thumb...I was about 4. Well, I picked my butt...

:lmao:

I threw a bowl of Ramen at the wall when Alex was 14 or 15 and giving me incessant crap about something. I did manage to not throw the bowl directly at her, but just barely.

The bowl hit the wall and she scurried to go do the task I'd assigned her that she was arguing about. So apparently throwing ramen for punishment works. Should have done that first. :jet:

It's no wonder I'm a therapy. My mother put this awful hot stuff on my thumb and fingers on my right hand to keep me from sucking my thumb...I was about 4. Well, I picked my butt...

ouch! :lol: Wait....are you saying that's what gave you a "hot ass?" :lmao:

Nah, she's an INTJ personality and no amount of therapy in the world will change that. You can tell by her thousand yard stare and the fact that she is trying to reason with a child. I seriously doubt she's an abuse victim.

I'll go for that :yay: Just to me she seemed detached, like there's a real demon just below the surface that she's trying desperately to keep under control.

I threw a bowl of Ramen at the wall when Alex was 14 or 15 and giving me incessant crap about something. I did manage to not throw the bowl directly at her, but just barely.

The bowl hit the wall and she scurried to go do the task I'd assigned her that she was arguing about. So apparently throwing ramen for punishment works. Should have done that first. :jet:

:lol:

My dad was away -- Marine Corps -- and it used to freak out my mom for the first week or so. Again..I was about 4. I wanted a chicken pot pie..screamed until I got it..then didn't want to eat it. She slapped me on the back of my head so hard, my face ended up in the plate.

It's no wonder I'm a therapy. My mother put this awful hot stuff on my thumb and fingers on my right hand to keep me from sucking my thumb...I was about 4. Well, I picked my butt...

:roflmao:

I just wonder why she has so many kids. She doesnt' seem like the kind of Mommy that loves kids. :shrug:

Most INTJ type personalities don't like small children or children they can't relate too. They usually like older children who are more communicative and willing to learn and experience and are teachable. Which may explain why she adopted. Sounds like this kid just isn't a fit for her and her coping skills.

ouch! :lol: Wait....are you saying that's what gave you a "hot ass?" :lmao:

Double whammy, her ass burned and her thumb tasted like shiat.

Double whammy, her ass burned and her thumb tasted like shiat.

:lol:

I remember telling Boy the story years ago..at first he seemed perplexed..then we both cracked up. :lol:

I guess I should have quoted the first post also for people that have no reading retention.No offense, but I think it's you that's slow, dude.I know that; I read every post. Hence why I said, "I read her post in less than 1 minute." If I could read her recap in that time, should it have taken much longer for the actual segment?


Hello?:shrug: Again, I read every post. She clarified her point in (2) subsequent posts.

Unless you think her stated point was not really her point. In which case, she is a glaring hypocrite.

Watching the clip, I would not agree with the women in the audience that the kid "should be taken from the home". The woman does seem lost, and like Vrai said, she would not be seeking help if she thought she was justified. Mig's appraisal seems valid; the mother needs training so she can in turn train her children effectively. Sad story. The kid may already be set for a few years of therapy.