Tech Support for New Husband

[DuffMan]

Originally Posted by High EGT

INSTALLING A HUSBAND

Dear Tech support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate



=====

DEAR DESPERATE,

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 was an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

Also do not attempt to reinstall Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,

Tech Support

I would not say to much, he might trade in wife 1.0 for a younger model!

[Queenofdenile1]

Originally Posted by High EGT

INSTALLING A HUSBAND

Dear Tech support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5 and then installed undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.

What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate



=====

DEAR DESPERATE,

First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 was an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and don't forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

Also do not attempt to reinstall Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck,

Tech Support

I LOVE IT!

[Queenofdenile1]

Originally Posted by DuffMan

I would not say to much, he might trade in wife 1.0 for a younger model!

Oh yeah, now there is a surprise!!

[High EGT]

The word on the street is Beer 6.1 will be replaced with a stand alone operating system Beer 6.9 but this comes with a warning that Beer 6.9 could crash the entire Wife 1.0 operating system should any future updates of Wife 1.0 conflict. Another rumor is Hooters 1.0 as an update to Wife 1.0 is to be available by the end of the year and may include a patch to solve any conflicts with Beer 6.9

[godsbutterfly]

This is great!!!!

[bigtw34]

This is too funny. I just read it aloud to everyone at work and they loved it!

[maceygirl12 (Premo)]

Awesome

[High EGT]

Microsoft reported yesterday that users with Husband 1.0 operating systems are under threat of a malicious program (Trojan) that reports say effects start up commands that ultimately confuse and frustrate or otherwise slows down the entire system. Infected systems have reported commands with names such as Whybother.exe or Ihaveaheadache.dll within the startup registry. The malicious program known as Rag.exe apparently first corrupts users of Wife 1.0 operating systems and because both operating systems have to interface to maintain harmony is why Husband 1.0 users should be concerned. Users of Wife 1.0 should avoid web sites with URLs that include Opra or Dr Phil to avoid possible infections.