Quote:
Originally Posted by kris31280  The short list:
1. Ambition - I have much, he must have at least some.
2. Faith - In something outside himself. Doesn't have to be God, doesn't have to be religion... just has to be a belief in something more than himself.
3. Strength - the ability to stand up to me when it needs to be done, but also the ability to stand back and let me shine sometimes.
4. Happiness - the ability to enjoy the little things in life, like sitting on a porch watching mother nature do her worst and realize just how wonderful it truly is.
5. Darkness - someone who has seen the depths of hell and has the scars to prove it, but has not been overcome by his experiences... he has learned from them.
6. Intense eyes - color is unimportant. Eyes are the window to the soul, and I must be able to see something in them.
7. Stability - Able to hold a job, create a life, be a provider.
8. Equality - Let a woman be a woman and a man be a man... but know that we both have strengths and weaknesses. I am no one's subordinate and he should not be mine, either.
9. Acceptance - I have a child, a son no less, with another man. He must be willing to accept my child as his own... to be a better man than the man who has fathered my child. Any man can be a father, it takes someone special to be a daddy.
10. Sexual Ability - last but certainly not least... the sex has to be good... if we're going to be having sex for the rest of our lives, I simply cannot and will not settle for less than mindblowing sex. |
Not picking on you Kris but here's Miggy's limited insight to your list of "desirable attributes"
1. Ambition. In not all things are people equally ambitious about. Sometimes there's a leader and there's a follower and some things you must do on your own. Ambition isn't necessarily a desirable attribute. Perhaps a better way to say it would be someone who is willing to let you choose the path and / or who you are willing to let choose the path.
5. Darkness. This just sounds horrid. Perhaps that isn't exactly what you should be looking for. Darkness implies a negative person. You don't want that (trust me) they will never become a positive person. I understand the gist of what you are saying though. Perhaps what you should consider instead of darkness in a person, one who is experienced in life, made mistakes but learned from them and doesn't carry their baggage around with them.
8. Equality - Ahh, in not everything are you equal to your partner and vice versus. The best thing in the world is to let your partner exceed at the things that they are best skilled for handling and vice versus and that both of you are willing to try new things together and seperately. Perhaps you want instead a man who respects women in general and appreciates you for you.
10. Sexual ability - implies experience and skill. IMHO sex skills can be "learned" but chemistry, desire and love has to make the learning worth it. Don't knock the less sexually skilled off your list.
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