Social experiment (rambling)

[vraiblonde]

The last few days I've been thinking about guys who hold the door and guys who don't, and women who say "thank you" and women who don't. I paid more attention in my travels to get a feel for what type of men are more likely to hold the door and what type of women will thank them.

A few examples:
(Skip to the end for the summary)

I approach the post office door and a 50s-ish guy, grubby, wild facial hair, could have passed for a homeless wino, gets there first, holds the door open for me to enter, then follows though the door. "Thank you!" I say. "My pleasure," says he.

I approach the C-store door and a late-40's, gray haired, nicely dressed in business attire, hair neatly combed, barrels past me to beat me to the door, opens it, bolts through and lets the door close in my face.

Get to the bank, another lady and I are approaching the door as a gentleman is coming out. Lady: slovenly, needs to wash her hair, overweight, K-Mart clothing. Man: blue collar dude, hops into the Norland truck, and is obviously a driver. Gentleman holds the door, lady blasts through without a glance, I say thank you.

Coming out of the CVS, young guy (late-teens, early 20s) holds the door for me and another woman, who is nicely dressed, looks like she plays tennis at the country club. We both thank him, and the other woman drops her bag. The young man promptly bends down, retrieves it and hands it back to her - "Here you are, ma'am.". The other lady and I fawn profusely over this kid and his nice manners, wanting his mother's phone number so we can call and tell her what her son just did.

SUMMARY:

Nice looking college age guys are #1 when it comes to holding the door, with blue collar types a close second. White collar guys not only slam it in your face, but will race you to get to the door first so they CAN slam it in your face.

The more physically attractive a woman is, the more likely she will thank someone for holding the door. Fat women do not say thank you, and ugly women do not say thank you. Nice looking women also hold the door for other women.

THE EXCEPTION:

With black people, it seems to be just the opposite: nicely dressed white-collar black guys will hold the door, and nice looking well-dressed black women will waltz through that door without a word. I didn't see any blue-collar black men or women, so I can't make a comparison between them.

So there you go - just my observation for the week.

[queencity28]

I was actually sitting here reading this, thinking, wow good observation. I am the observant type as well. But you know that last observation you threw in there, I was like...that figures. I am guessing you did not come across any latino or asian men or women either?

[onebdzee (Premo)]

Originally Posted by vraiblonde

SUMMARY:

Nice looking college age guys are #1 when it comes to holding the door, with blue collar types a close second. White collar guys not only slam it in your face, but will race you to get to the door first so they CAN slam it in your face.

Have to agree with this one....best friend(business owner) always holds the door for woman

Originally Posted by vraiblande

The more physically attractive a woman is, the more likely she will thank someone for holding the door. Fat women do not say thank you, and ugly women do not say thank you. Nice looking women also hold the door for other women.

I always hold the door for people(and so do my kids)....I don't think that it's a "attractive" thing(not saying that I'm not attractive)....I just think it's a "being polite thing....I also always say thank you(and so do my kids), I really beleive that it's all in the way you were raised, could be wrong though

[Airgasm]

Me thinks you need to increase your sample size and it's diversity. So head out to the local Mickey D's and get more data

[Vince]

Originally Posted by vraiblonde

I approach the post office door and a 50s-ish guy, grubby, wild facial hair, could have passed for a homeless wino, gets there first, holds the door open for me to enter, then follows though the door. "Thank you!" I say. "My pleasure," says he.

I'm not a homeless wino.




P.S. I would have thought that age would be a contributor also. As I was brought up in the 60's and was taught a gentleman always holds the door for a lady, never hit girls, etc.

[just.me]

Originally Posted by vraiblonde

The last few days I've been thinking about guys who hold the door and guys who don't, and women who say "thank you" and women who don't. I paid more attention in my travels to get a feel for what type of men are more likely to hold the door and what type of women will thank them.

A few examples:
(Skip to the end for the summary)

I approach the post office door and a 50s-ish guy, grubby, wild facial hair, could have passed for a homeless wino, gets there first, holds the door open for me to enter, then follows though the door. "Thank you!" I say. "My pleasure," says he.

I approach the C-store door and a late-40's, gray haired, nicely dressed in business attire, hair neatly combed, barrels past me to beat me to the door, opens it, bolts through and lets the door close in my face.

Get to the bank, another lady and I are approaching the door as a gentleman is coming out. Lady: slovenly, needs to wash her hair, overweight, K-Mart clothing. Man: blue collar dude, hops into the Norland truck, and is obviously a driver. Gentleman holds the door, lady blasts through without a glance, I say thank you.

Coming out of the CVS, young guy (late-teens, early 20s) holds the door for me and another woman, who is nicely dressed, looks like she plays tennis at the country club. We both thank him, and the other woman drops her bag. The young man promptly bends down, retrieves it and hands it back to her - "Here you are, ma'am.". The other lady and I fawn profusely over this kid and his nice manners, wanting his mother's phone number so we can call and tell her what her son just did.

SUMMARY:

Nice looking college age guys are #1 when it comes to holding the door, with blue collar types a close second. White collar guys not only slam it in your face, but will race you to get to the door first so they CAN slam it in your face.

The more physically attractive a woman is, the more likely she will thank someone for holding the door. Fat women do not say thank you, and ugly women do not say thank you. Nice looking women also hold the door for other women.

THE EXCEPTION:

With black people, it seems to be just the opposite: nicely dressed white-collar black guys will hold the door, and nice looking well-dressed black women will waltz through that door without a word. I didn't see any blue-collar black men or women, so I can't make a comparison between them.

So there you go - just my observation for the week.

Oh, Vrai, I am both fat and ugly and I have very good manners. My momma raised me right.....Another social observation for you.....when I used to work for a very busy liquor store and guys would come in to buy cigarettes, I would make a point of asking if they wanted "hard" or "soft" pack....99% would rather choke than say the word "soft" ...if they did prefer the soft pack, they would bend over backwards to not say it....LOL

[onebdzee (Premo)]

Originally Posted by Vince

I'm not a homeless wino.




P.S. I would have thought that age would be a contributor also. As I was brought up in the 60's and was taught a gentleman always holds the door for a lady, never hit girls, etc.

My kids(age range from 21 to 8) are very polite....they always hold the door, say "please" and "thank you"....I think if you are raised to do these things then it comes as "second nature" to you and you teach your kids the same manners

[vraiblonde]

Originally Posted by queencity28

I am guessing you did not come across any latino or asian men or women either?

The ONLY exceptions were the black men and women. Hispanics did the same thing Asians did, who did the same as whites. That took a couple of days to dawn on me because I wasn't really paying attention to race in my experiment and the black guys were goofing up my results.

[migtig]

You've pretty much pegged it. Especially about upscale white males slamming the door in your face. However, I have had my door held open by a preteen/early teen African-American, as well as older African-American males, not to mention mixed race, Asian and American Indian. Heck I have even had my door held open by a prince from one of the Arab Immirate States (who also kissed my hand - very charming). I have always been gracious in my appreciation. I also hold open the door for other ladies and offer to help older ladies to carry their packages. However, the males that never seems to hold open the door for me (in my social observations) and actually seems to expect that I'll hold the door for them (which I do) are from the country of India.

[Chasey_Lane]

I'll hold the door for anyone both male & female and I ALWAYS say "Thank you!" when someone holds the door for me. In my experience, it's usually the black women who barge on through w/out a thank you. Men will typically say "No, you first!" or something of that nature.