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Movies & Films Review Movies you saw in the theatre or on home video.

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Old 05-20-2002, 06:04 PM   #1 (permalink)
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Thumbs down Attack ofthe Clones

MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS!
Star Wars: Steaming pile o' dog doo doo. The dialogue was horrible, and the love scenes between Amidala and Anakin were cheesy and totally laughable. Amidala's and Anakin's romance was rushed and undeveloped; these 2 can't touch Hahn and Leia. When the movie did start to get on a roll, it would cut to another scene and different strand of the plot, ex: Obi wan Kenobi chasing the Fetts or Anakin taking revenge on the desert people. The CG Yoda at the end looked cheesy (maybe I'm just used to the puppet). What was with all the limb amputations?? Ex: female assassin, stadium beast, Anakin, Annakin's mom's new husband.

It was good to see C3P0 and R2D2 again. They provided much more levity than Jar Jar did in Phantom Menace. Amidala looked fab in every scene with her gorgeous costumes and elaborate head pieces. The sets were breathtaking, as well. The one part of the movie that I found compelling was when Anakin went to Tattoine to find his mama.

Bottomline: I want my money back!
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Old 05-20-2002, 06:08 PM   #2 (permalink)
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Yeah, Episode 1 stunk, too. Oh well, I'm a big Star Wars fan so I'll see it anyway. It's kind of disappointing to wait all this time to see the prequels, only to have them be so extraordinarily bad.
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Old 05-20-2002, 06:58 PM   #3 (permalink)
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I've heard most people either love it or hate it, but I will see it too. If it's that bad I can always go to sleep while my hubbie enjoys it.
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Old 05-20-2002, 08:32 PM   #4 (permalink)
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I thought it was better than Episode I (which isn't saying much). It seemed a lot longer than it really is (I looked at my watch when my butt started going numb, and there was still over an hour to go).

But, I thought it was entertaining, overall, and not too bad. The worst part is the dialog (like C3PO's "This is such a drag" and "I'm beside myself"). Actually, I found both droids kind of annoying, which surprised me. The love story was pretty underdeveloped, and some parts of the overall plot were also underdeveloped.

I didn't mind the flipping between the two threads of the story, really. I did like Yoda mixing it up with Bocu, though the graphics were kind of cheesy.

Overall, I liked it, but I'm glad I only paid $5 (afternoon matinee). Video/DVD rental would be better, since you can pause it when your butt starts going numb.
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Old 05-20-2002, 08:49 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Budo, where did you go? Damn, I couldn't get anywhere near the theaters without a huge friggin' crowd. I may have to go on a really odd time, like a weekday afternoon or something.

I looked all this weekend, but it just was too crowded for me. I hate crowded theaters.
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Old 05-21-2002, 09:10 AM   #6 (permalink)
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I went to the theater in Lexington Park, the 11:45 a.m. show. I got there around 11:00 (this was Sunday, figuring Saturday would be worse), and there was already a ticket-holder's line as well as a ticket booth line. The theater was pretty full, but I don't know if it was sold out (we sat all the way up front to help compensate for the small screen, so I didn't have a good view of the audience).
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Old 05-21-2002, 12:33 PM   #7 (permalink)
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My daughter, her boyfriend and I went to see it last night. They got up for breaks 3 times, so it must not have been THAT riveting! LOL!

I liked it better than Episode 1 only in that it gave more background info leading up to the original first Star Wars; i.e. where the clones originated, what role the original Jedis played, who WAS that creepy dude that Darth Vader was always consulting (Darth Sidious!), etc. etc. It also FINALLY starts to show that yes, there is a "dark side" of Anikan, that could potentially lead to his transformation into Darth Vader.

This is my theory for future episodes: Anikan and Amidalah continue with their idyllic (albeit hasty and underdeveloped) relationship/marriage. They have their 2 kids, Leia and Luke. Something horrible happens to Amidalah and she dies, so Anikan completes quirks out, screaming, "IT'S NOT FAIR! IT'S NOT FAIR! I'm SICK of being a good little Jedi! I want to go out and KILL THE WHOLE DAMN REPUBLIC!" For their own safety, Yoda absconds with Luke and Leia, and leaves Luke with his uncle (Ani's step brother) on Tatoine, and sells the now breathtakingly beautiful Leia to a prince on some obscure planet to help subsize his Jedi School...

Ani, now insane with grief, converts to the dark side... Yoda tries to stop him (in another scintillating Kung Fu Yoda scene!), but only succeeds in horribly mutilating his face...Luke runs off to join the dark side dudes, who make him a wonderful helmet to cover his grostesquely mangled face... Ani, being the strongest Jedi in the galaxy (as we're told in Episode 2!) kicks all the other Jedi's butts and takes over the clone army...Together with the help of Darth Sidious, they build the awesome Death Star, reprogram the clones to become aggressive killing-machines, and give them a new name – Stormtroopers! Then they proceed to try to track down and wipe out the few Jedis who got away...

Feel free to add your own chapter to the story, or change it altogether...
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Old 05-21-2002, 05:42 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Sierra says: "They have their 2 kids, Leia and Luke. Something horrible happens to Amidalah and she dies, so Anikan completes quirks out, screaming, "IT'S NOT FAIR! IT'S NOT FAIR! I'm SICK of being a good little Jedi! "

Well, Vader/Anakin didn't know about his children until much later. Amidala hid the kids on 2 different planets to help keep their existences secret. So... that means that Mom and Dad must have been seperated or broke up at least 9 months prior to Luke and Leia's birth. I predict that Amidala will finally get tired of Anakin's stalker-like behavior or his childish come-on lines. :p
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Old 05-22-2002, 12:31 PM   #9 (permalink)
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Shelly – Cool twist! But are we SURE Ani/Vader didn't know about his kids? Maybe he jsut thought they were killed along with Amidala in some horrible spaceflight accident, but instead they took separate escape pods that went to opposite ends of the universe! Then of COURSE he wouldn't have recognized and/or expected to see them 20 years later... :D

I like your theory that Amidala just got fed up with the his trip to the "psycho side"....
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