Living with Parents at 27

[xobxdoc]

Originally Posted by kwillia

A young adult joining the military is moving into Uncle Sam's house... he/she isn't in a position to have to put a roof over his head, pay utilities, vehicle payment/fuel/insurance, food and other sorts all on a starting salary pay check... not at all the same.

I don't consider a young woman jumping into a relationship and shacking up as making it on her own because all she does is leave being a dependent of her parents to being a dependent of a man.... I thought that was what your daughter did, but my memory must have been wrong.

Yep, if your daughter found a co-op situation and actually paid her way then of course that counts as starting out on her own.

Not exactly correct. There were several duty stations I had where I had to find my own place. I needed roommates because at the time, E-4s were getting a whopping $900 a month. The Navy kicked in with an extra 100 to help with housing. I had plenty of bills that came with the housing too.
I paid my way, as do many that serve their country.

[Beta84]

Originally Posted by Chasey_Lane

Around $900 - $1200 would be my guess.

unless it's at Abberly!

Originally Posted by kwillia

If they are off in college that doesn't count as them being out on their own.

Unless they're paying for their college out of pocket and/or with scholarships/loans. Basically the only time I wouldn't consider it "on their own" is if the parents are paying.

Originally Posted by Chasey_Lane

My daughter is just shy of 16. I bought her an SUV about a month ago. I will gladly pay for college and all of her expenses if she pursues a degree that has the potential to earn her money. If she doesn't want to go to college, she'll be expected to pay rent, and will be expected to be on her own -- but it won't be right away. I understand she won't be able to afford anything right after graduation and I'm okay with that. I don't think she's the type that will stay home forever.

That's the biggest problem these days -- kids pick stupid degrees that aren't going to earn them much money, or don't realize that the degree they're picking requires grad school. Look at how many psych or philosophy (for example) students there are in undergrad that have no intention of going to grad school. What are those people going to do when they finish school, exactly? Not much. What a waste of 4+ years of college.

Originally Posted by kwillia

BTW... when daughter goes off to college... I really don't think she's ever moving back in unless she has to kill time until she gets her security clearance.

Shouldn't an interim security clearance be in place so that's not an issue? After school I had to move back home for a few months before I got a job, but after that it's been all good by myself.

[sockgirl77 (Premo)]

I was given 3 choices at the age of 18. Work full time, go to school full time, or get the #### out. My parents never set aside money for me to go to school and I never kept good enough grades to get any type of scholarship. Education was not exactly a priority to my parents, I guess. I was rarely disciplined for bad grades. So I got the #### out, worked full time, and went to school part time when I could. Over the years I moved back home to stay for a month or two but that's all that I could handle. I saved money and got the #### out again.

I have 2 younger brothers. They've been raised totally different than I was raised. One is 23. He got some scholarships and my parents paid for whatever they did not cover. He graduated college with honors, had a good job lined up before graduation, and is completely living on his own. The other is 20. He's living at home, not in college, drives a new car, and has yet to get a job. Now, he has mental issues but he has never been pushed to do ANYTHING.

I'm learning from all of this and am raising my kids based on the mistakes that I feel that my parents have made and are making. I stress the value of a good education, have their college tuition taken care of, and teach them to be independent every day.

In saying all of this, I realize that today's economy is rough. I will have no problem with any of my kids living with me when they are adults if they are working full time or in school full time. But, they must show that they are working towards getting the #### out of my house. I will not fully support an adult child if they are doing nothing but lounging on my couch and mooching off of me.

I used the term "####" because well, that's exactly how it was said to me when I was 18.

[GURPS (Premo)]

Originally Posted by Beta84

That's the biggest problem these days -- kids pick stupid degrees that aren't going to earn them much money, or don't realize that the degree they're picking requires grad school.

Women's Studies - PHD

[Gilligan (Premo)]

Observing how successfull my two oldest have already been, my dilema is different: I'm having a hard time deciding which one of them I want to move in with.

I was entirely on my own at age 17, in 1976, so I don't have any experience with the subject really.

[Roman]

I personally think that we make our Kids too comfortable, which is why some of them stay at home longer. I told my kids that as long as they are in school full-time, they could live rent free. if they chose to work, they had to pay rent, but still live with my rules, which were more of a curtesy thing. Like, let me know about when you'll be home type thing. Our Son left at 19, and our Daughter left at the age of 20. Never to return, except for visits. Son will be 40 this year, and Daughter 34.

[libertytyranny]

I know a lot of people living with parents/family..who are doing so because they are lazy and have no initiative. Sometimes you have to work super hard for little pay and live in the ghetto without cable. thats life. Many of them are college grads who move back home because they don't want to work at a job they think doesn't pay them enough..or isnt their "dream job" I have no sympathy. I wiped ass all through high school and college, and have lived on my own apartment since I was 20 and a senior in college..before that I lived in dorms and aside from one small loan, all the other college loans are in my name and I received scholarships to cover half of my tuition.

I can't hear "im living with my parents because the economy is bad" one more time without going nuts. These same people look at me like I am crazy when I say I have two jobs..I am doing what I have to do to keep myself afloat. I will say that living expenses around here are extremely high..so people had better prepare their children for that fact.

And damniiittt if I am not going to have to start wiping ass again if I lose my job.

[Baja28 (Premo)]

Originally Posted by libertytyranny

I know a lot of people living with parents/family..who are doing so because they are lazy and have no initiative. Sometimes you have to work super hard for little pay and live in the ghetto without cable. thats life. Many of them are college grads who move back home because they don't want to work at a job they think doesn't pay them enough..or isnt their "dream job" I have no sympathy. I wiped ass all through high school and college, and have lived on my own apartment since I was 20 and a senior in college..before that I lived in dorms and aside from one small loan, all the other college loans are in my name and I received scholarships to cover half of my tuition.

I can't hear "im living with my parents because the economy is bad" one more time without going nuts. These same people look at me like I am crazy when I say I have two jobs..I am doing what I have to do to keep myself afloat. I will say that living expenses around here are extremely high..so people had better prepare their children for that fact.

And damniiittt if I am not going to have to start wiping ass again if I lose my job.

Come to Baja hunney!

[libertytyranny]

Originally Posted by Baja28

Come to Baja hunney!

do you need your ass wiped?

I made a joke. But I still dread itttttt.

[sockgirl77 (Premo)]

Originally Posted by libertytyranny

I know a lot of people living with parents/family..who are doing so because they are lazy and have no initiative. Sometimes you have to work super hard for little pay and live in the ghetto without cable. thats life. Many of them are college grads who move back home because they don't want to work at a job they think doesn't pay them enough..or isnt their "dream job" I have no sympathy. I wiped ass all through high school and college, and have lived on my own apartment since I was 20 and a senior in college..before that I lived in dorms and aside from one small loan, all the other college loans are in my name and I received scholarships to cover half of my tuition.

I can't hear "im living with my parents because the economy is bad" one more time without going nuts. These same people look at me like I am crazy when I say I have two jobs..I am doing what I have to do to keep myself afloat. I will say that living expenses around here are extremely high..so people had better prepare their children for that fact.

And damniiittt if I am not going to have to start wiping ass again if I lose my job.

And then there are adults that are living with their parents but are helping them out. I have a few friends around my age that are living with their parents. They help them out with the bills and the parents have the room for them to be there. I don't really see a problem with this. But, they're not mooching off of them so that's the difference.