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|07-07-2004, 02:52 AM||#41|
Member Since: Jul 2004
Location: Right here.
God doesn't hate you.
In His Name be Blessed,
God hates sin, but not the sinner in which according to St Paul the Apostle all fall short of the mark.
Life is, if you'll forgive my wording, Hell.. But then life can be Good.. It depends on what we are willing to put into it.. Sometimes we must hit Rock Bottom before we reach up to God. Sounds like you have hit the Rock Bottom and I hope you are sincere about reaching out to Him..
In 1986 I think, I hit Rock Bottom and my life was turned upside down. At that time I thought I was a Christian, but merely scratched the surface of Christianity. In 1994 I became Eastern Orthodox Christian by the Grace and Mercy of God and thanks to God for the Order and that I found in His Church, my life has turned around.. Now I guess I am about as close to being a Monk as a married man can be. I have put asside the hatred of those I felt had really nailed me in life and realized that Life is an accumilation or deeds or works if you wish.. I discovered that the situations I found myself in 1986 were of myown doing, but it was not until I turned it all over to God had I came to this conclussion. I discovered that after all those years blaming everyone else and even God for the condition of my life, it was all of my doing. I then began praying 6 simple words, "Lord have mercy on me a sinner".. I prayed those very words over and over again all my waking hours as if I were trying to convience myself those simple words would actually help me. Even when I would be trying to sleep those 6 simple words would get louder and louder and louder in my minds eye view.. You know something, it did help me.. They helped me because I discovered a very strong faith in God. I have seen His power in my life when I had enough faith in Him to completely turn my problems over to Him.
My situation was simular to yours, but in my case I would have been your father. If I was I ask your forgiveness. However simular not exact. I'm not saying that now everyday for me is easy or that everyday is rough, but now I contend with what I can contend with and leave the rest up to God..
There is a Slavic story about a Village where every night the villagers would make with all sorts of perversions and the demons left them alone.. On the other hand the poor monks really had a very hard time with demons coming to them and causing all sorts of problems.. The moral of this story is that as long as the evilone is knocking at your door which seems to be the case with you, the battle has not been won by the evilone because he is still trying to turn you totally away from God. Like children in school, ever notice that the little boy who picks on the little girl usually has a crush on the little girl? Well the samething applies in your case. The evilone has a crush on you and want you.
What I believe places us in the termoil you are in now is that we, for some strange reason beyond me, think that we are like stone and have total control over our lives. We think that we can and must control each thing large or small that happens to us alone.. Well we can't. Life is a Journey and as with all journeys there are paths we take.. Some easy and some hard, but each path we take is of ourown chosing.. However the enlightened ones realize that we are never alone in such a Journey.. All we have to do is to reach out and with all honesty from the bottom of our being say, Lord have mercy on me a sinner and ask Mary the Most Holy Mother of God, considering Christ is God and Mary gave birth to Him, and say "Most Holy Mother of God Pray before you Son for me asking Him to grant me wisdom in my choices" also ask, "St Michael the Archangel Guide and Guard me and mine from evil" and leave the rest to God..
Control what you can control, have Faith and leave the rest to the Heavenly Father..
I can not nor would not tell you which church to go to, but if you need help in making a choice, message me privately or email me and we can discuss it in private.. And remember, It is all about the Journey and nothing more.
"Reflections are but scant reminders to one's wasted youth." Mike Zuchick III
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|07-07-2004, 07:56 AM||#42|
Member Since: May 2004
Hey Christy my heart goes out to you. I can't tell you much about God because I just don't know. I will tell you that there are only a couple of things that I pray for; the health and happiness of my family and I, and the health and happiness of everyone else. Not trying to come across as corny... too late... but you are in my prayers and probably the prayers of many others.
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|08-04-2004, 12:01 PM||#43|
Member Since: Aug 2004
Hi Christy, I sympathyze; what u r feeling is normal, given the circumstances. Read a book called "Crazy Time" not sure of the author, but I'm sure u can find it on Amazon for a few $. I think the hosts reply was a little harsh, we all grieve differently, and shrinks say a break-up is more stressful than a death, since u don't have the same closure.
No God doesn't hate you, people r imperfect, and hurt us, that's why we need God, the perfect parent. When we realize this, it's what people call being "born-again" and God re-parents and heals us from our pasts.
A counselor would be a great idea, and also church. It's the only place u can go to hear how valuable, loved and special u r.
Find one that makes you feel loved, not condemned; the word "Gospel" means "Good News," not a bunch of stuff about how you're not good enough and need to earn God's love; you don't; just reach out and grab it and hold on while He gets you thru this.
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