Eeekkk!!!

Depends on if she's hungry or not. She doesn't usually. She has only bitten me once. Other then that she's pretty darn docile.

[kbeachcat123]

I take it the cat and dog don't mess with her.

Originally Posted by kbeachcat123

I take it the cat and dog don't mess with her.

Dogs have only seen her through the glass, the cats follow her around the room but only chance pawing at her tail, never near her mouth!

I have a serious question. Does your reptile stink? My roomate many years ago had a snake that smelled like death warmed over. We parted ways.

[KAT20619]

This story is toooo funny not to share............... A must read!!!!
If you have raised kids (or been one), and gone through the pet syndrome,
Including toilet flush burials for dead goldfish, the story below will have
You laughing out loud!

Overview: I had to take my son's lizard to the vet.

Here's what happened:

Just after dinner one night, my son came up to tell me there was "something
Wrong" with one of the two lizards he holds prisoner in his room.

"He's just lying there looking sick," he told me. "I'm serious, Dad. Can you
Help?"

I put my best lizard-healer expression on my face and followed him into his
Bedroom. One of the little lizards was indeed lying on his back, looking
Stressed. I immediately knew what to do.

"Honey," I called, "come look at the lizard!"

"Oh, my gosh!" my wife exclaimed. "She's having babies."

"What?" my son demanded. "But their names are Bert and Ernie, Mom!"

I was equally outraged.

"Hey, how can that be? I thought we said we didn't want them to reproduce," I
Said accusingly to my wife.

"Well, what do you want me to do, post a sign in their cage?" she inquired (I
Think she actually said this sarcastically!).

"No, but you were supposed to get two boys!" I reminded her, (in my most
Loving, calm, sweet voice, while gritting my teeth).

"Yeah, Bert and Ernie!" my son agreed.

"Well, it's just a little hard to tell on some guys, you know," she informed
Me (Again with the sarcasm!).

By now the rest of the family had gathered to see what was going on. I
Shrugged, deciding to make the best of it.

"Kids, this is going to be a wondrous experience," I announced. "We're about
To witness the miracle of birth."

"Oh, gross!" they shrieked.

"Well, isn't THAT just great? What are we going to do with a litter of tiny
Little lizard babies?" my wife wanted to know.

We peered at the patient. After much struggling, what looked like a tiny foot
Would appear briefly, vanishing a scant second later.

"We don't appear to be making much progress," I noted.

"It's breech," my wife whispered, horrified.

"Do something, Dad!" my son urged.

"Okay, okay." Squeamishly, I reached in and grabbed the foot when it next
Appeared, giving it a gentle tug. It disappeared. I tried several more times
With the same results.

"Should I call 911?" my eldest daughter wanted to know. "Maybe they could talk
Us through the trauma." (You see a pattern here with the females in my
House?)

"Let's get Ernie to the vet," I said grimly. We drove to the vet with my son
Holding the cage in his lap. "Breathe, Ernie, breathe," he urged.

"I don't think lizards do Lamaze," his mother noted to him. (Women can be so
Cruel to their own young. I mean what she does to me is one thing, but this
Boy is of her womb, for God's sake.).

The vet took Ernie back to the examining room and peered at the little animal
Through a magnifying glass.

"What do you think, Doc, a C-section?" I suggested scientifically.

"Oh, very interesting," he murmured. "Mr. And Mrs. Cameron, may I speak to you
Privately for a moment?"

I gulped, nodding for my son to step outside.

"Is Ernie going to be okay?" my wife asked.

"Oh, perfectly," the vet assured us. "This lizard is not in labor. In fact,
That isn't EVER going to happen . . . Ernie is a boy. You see, Ernie is a
Young male. And occasionally, as they come into maturity, like most male
Species, they um . . . Um . . . Masturbate. Just the way he did, lying on his
Back." He blushed, glancing at my wife.

We were silent, absorbing this.

"So, Ernie's just . . Just . . Excited," my wife offered.

"Exactly," the vet replied, relieved that we understood.

More silence. Then my vicious, cruel wife started to giggle. And giggle. And
Then even laugh loudly.

"What's so funny?" I demanded, knowing, but not believing that the woman I
Married would commit the upcoming affront to my flawless manliness.

Tears were now running down her face. "It's just . . . that . . I'm picturing
you pulling on its . . . its . . teeny little . .." She gasped for more air
to bellow in laughter once more.

"That's enough," I warned. We thanked the vet and hurriedly bundled the lizard
and our son back into the car. He was glad everything was going to be okay.

"I know Ernie's really thankful for what you did, Dad," he told me.

"Oh, you have NO idea," my wife agreed, collapsing with laughter.

Two lizards: $140.
One cage: $50.
Trip to the vet: $30.
Memory of your husband pulling on a lizard's winkie: Priceless!

Moral of the story: Pay attention in biology class. Lizards lay eggs .

Originally Posted by Kain99

I have a serious question. Does your reptile stink? My roomate many years ago had a snake that smelled like death warmed over. We parted ways.

Nope, she doesn't stink at all! If she did I wouldn't be playing with her!

Originally Posted by Mousebaby

Nope, she doesn't stink at all! If she did I wouldn't be playing with her!

She's absolutely beautiful and now that I know she smells good, I love her!

Originally Posted by KAT20619

Two lizards: $140.
One cage: $50.
Trip to the vet: $30.
Memory of your husband pulling on a lizard's winkie: Priceless!

Moral of the story: Pay attention in biology class. Lizards lay eggs .

Yes I have seen this one before and I laughed my azz off then too!

Originally Posted by Kain99

She's absolutely beautiful and now that I know she smells good, I love her!

Good, she is really cool! She loves to eat blueberries right out of my hand and she likes only Iams chicken catfood. We got her already hooked on that stuff, vet says its ok just to cut back on how much and how often as she is too fat. As if you couldn't tell that. So I usually only feed her once every 4-5 days. She's cool with that. She has lost a little since we got her, but not much. As long as she's happy, I think she will be fine!

[Lugnut]

Originally Posted by Mousebaby

Here she is!!! It's my beautiful blue tongued skink!! Doesn't she look good in purple?

Well, we definitely won't confuse that with the similarly named Maryland blue tongued skank now will we?!