Who Has it Hard???

[RoseRed (Premo)]

When I was a kid, adults used to bore me to tears with their tedious diatribes about how hard things were when they were growing up; what with walking twenty-five miles to school every morning uphill both ways through year 'round blizzards carrying their younger siblings on their backs to their one-room schoolhouse where they maintained a straight-A average despite their full-time after-school job at the local textile mill where they worked for 35 cents an hour just to help keep their family from
starving to death!

And I remember promising myself that when I grew up there was no way in hell I was going to lay a bunch of crap like that on kids about how hard I had it and how easy they've got it!

But....

Now that I've reached the ripe old age of thirty, I can't help but
look around and notice the youth of today. You've got it so ####in'
easy! I mean, compared to my childhood, you live in a Goddamned Utopia!

And I hate to say it but you kids today you don't know how good
you've got it!

I mean, when I was a kid we didn't have The Internet--we wanted to know something, we had to go to the goddamned library and look it up ourselves!

And there was no email! We had to actually write somebody a
letter--with a pen!-- and then you had to walk all the way across
the street and put it in the ####in' mailbox and it would take like a week to get there!

And there were no MP3s or Napsters! You wanted to steal music, you had to go to the goddamned record store and shoplift it yourself! Or we had to wait around all day to tape it off the radio and the DJ would usually talk over the beginning and #### it all up!

You want to hear about hardship?

You couldn't just download porn! You had to bribe some homeless dude to buy you a copy of "Hustler" at the 7-11!

Those were your options!

We didn't have fancy #### like Call Waiting! If you were on the
phone and somebody else called they got a busy signal!

And we didn't have fancy Caller ID Boxes either! When the phone
rang, you had no idea who it was it could be your boss, your mom, a collections agent, your drug dealer, you didn't know!!! You just had to pick it up and take your chances, mister!

And we didn't have any fancy Sony Playstation videogames with
high-resolution 3-D graphics! We had the Atari 2600! With games
like "Space Invaders" and "Asteroids" and the graphics sucked ###! Your guy was a little square! You had to use your imagination! And there were no multiple levels or screens, it was just one screen forever! And you could never win, the game just kept getting harder and faster until you died!

Just like LIFE!

When you went to the movie theater there no such thing as stadium seating! All the seats were the same height! A tall guy sat in front of you, you were screwed!

And sure, we had cable television, but back then that was only
like 20 channels and there was no onscreen menu! You had to use a little book called a TV Guide to find out what was on!

And there was no Cartoon Network! You could only get cartoons on Saturday morning... ...D'ya hear what the #### I'm saying!?! We had to wait ALL WEEK, you spoiled little bastards!

That's exactly what I'm talking about! You kids today have got it
too easy. You're spoiled, I swear to God! You guys wouldn't last five minutes back in 1984!

[Kyle]

[MDindef]

Originally posted by RoseRed
You guys wouldn't last five minutes back in 1984!

1984...try 1970. "Just three channels and PBS, and when the President was on, your evening was shot!" Wait all week to see Gilligan's Island (new episodes) and Flipper, and then Nixon comes on and screws it all up!

[Tonio]

The only thing I would add would be (in my Dana Carvey Old Man voice), "In myyyyy daaaayyyyyyy, we didn't have ree-mote controls for our teee-vees. We had to get up and change the channel, and we LIKED it!" (And to even get to the TV, we had to walk through 10 feet of snow, uphill both ways...)