Actual entries on hospital charts!

[PelyKat]

Actual entries on hospital charts!

1. The patient refused autopsy.
2. The patient has no previous history of suicides.
3. Patient has left white blood cells at another hospital.
4. She has no rigors or shaking chills, but her
husband states she was very hot in bed last night.
5. Patient has chest pain if she lies on her left side
for over a year.
6. On the second day the knee was better and on the
third day it disappeared.
7. The patient is tearful and crying constantly. She
also appears to be depressed.
8. The patient has been depressed since she began
seeing me in 1993.
9. Discharge status: Alive but without permission.
10. Healthy appearing decrepit 69-year old male,
mentally alert but forgetful.
11. Patient had waffles for breakfast and anorexia for lunch.
12. She is numb from her toes down.
13. While in ER, she was examined, x-rated and sent home.
14. The skin was moist and dry.
15. Occasional, constant infrequent headaches.
16. Patient was alert and unresponsive.
17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.
18. She stated that she had been constipated for most
of her life, until she got a divorce.
19. I saw your patient today, who is still under our
car for physical therapy.
20. Both breasts are equal and reactive to light and accomodation.
21. Examination of genitalia reveals that he is
circus sized.
22. The lab test indicated abnormal lover function.
23. Skin: somewhat pale but present.
24. The pelvic exam will be done later on the floor.
25. Patient has two teenage children, but no other
abnormalities

[Pandora]

[LPGM2003]

Originally Posted by PelyKat

17. Rectal examination revealed a normal size thyroid.

I would hate to be this patient

[Pasofever]

[Beelzebaby666]

That's the funniest thing I've read all day!!

[Dougstermd]

gotta love this one

25. Patient has two teenage children, but no other
abnormalities