Helping your child/ren

Helping your child/ren

  • Daughter No, Son Yes

    Votes: 0 0.0%

  • Total voters
    41

DoWhat

Deplorable
PREMO Member
Would/Did you help your child starting out in the real world?
Car, apartment, food, money, …?
Does the amount of help matter if the child is male or female?
 

Heresathought1

New Member
I have a fabulously responsible daughter whom I've helped getting her start in life. She is an only child and I am in a position to be able to help. I don't mind as long as she is making good decisions and is appropriately grateful.
 

DoWhat

Deplorable
PREMO Member
I have a fabulously responsible daughter whom I've helped getting her start in life. She is an only child and I am in a position to be able to help. I don't mind as long as she is making good decisions and is appropriately grateful.

What if she was a son?
 

mAlice

professional daydreamer
Would/Did you help your child starting out in the real world?
Car, apartment, food, money, …?
Does the amount of help matter if the child is male or female?

Provided said child is gainfully employed, and footing most of the bill, yes.

I would not pay for an apartment, but might help with first and last. Child has to be able to at least pay rent and utilities. I wouldn't mind helping out with groceries when things get tight. Child must be able to support own transportation, because there is usually public transportation if they can't afford a vehicle. If distance is reasonable, rides to and from work/shopping would not be out of the question. Gender would not be a factor.
 
I don't care how well off the parents are... the best gift a parent can give an adult child is to have faith in them that they can pull themselves up by their own boot straps. If you feel you need constantly provide support to them then you are belittling their growth potential and doubting their abilities.
 

Heresathought1

New Member
I don't care how well off the parents are... the best gift a parent can give an adult child is to have faith in them that they can pull themselves up by their own boot straps. If you feel you need constantly provide support to them then you are belittling their growth potential and doubting their abilities.
You are 100% correct. You don't want to help them to the degree that you would stunt their ability to make it on their own.
 

bohman

Well-Known Member
To me, gender doesn't matter. It's whether they are responsible or not. If you think they'll use the money well, then sure, chip in. If they'll more than likely waste it, then they can sink or swim on their own.
 

n0n1m0us3

why so serious
I expect my children to leave here and go to college, so yes I will help them as much as I can when they finally move the heck out.:cartwheel
Regardless of gender.
 

vince77

Active Member
I'll give each one of them 25K when they are married and want the first house...1 down, two to go....
 

FED_UP

Well-Known Member
If he or she is doing everything in they can to work, school etc and lead a productive life I would help out as much as I could.
 
I have helped out my son and daughter from time to time. Don't have issues with it.

I think there is a huge difference between helping from time to time and supporting their living expenses. I didn't cast my vote because I certainly would help from time to time, but don't agree with providing for them so that they can maintain the same quality of living as they experienced while home or drive high-end vehicles etc... I believe that should come about from their own merits and accomplishments. Doing it for them stunts their growth.
 

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
The kid we shoved out the door to fly and be free on his own - doing great!

The kids we "helped" with money or support - not so much.

Just an observation.
 

chernmax

NOT Politically Correct!!
Every day I tell my daughter I'm preparing her for life without us. She understood it even more when my dad passed away in September... I love her and she's awesome...:yahoo:
 

pixiegirl

Cleopatra Jones
The kid we shoved out the door to fly and be free on his own - doing great!

The kids we "helped" with money or support - not so much.

Just an observation.

Honest question, why did you do differently for different children? Right now I "plan" on doing the same for both of my kids (unless #1's hearing loss progresses to the point of disability but I'll cross that bridge if/when I get there). Granted they're both boys and close in age so I think it's easy for me to have that mindset.
 
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