Open Discussion: Children Left in Cars

GW8345

Not White House Approved
Since the OP of the now deleted thread got all butt hurt that people actually had strong opinions and deleted the previous thread here is a new thread for open discussion. You don’t have to worry about this thread being deleted since I’m not a premo member and the only person who could delete this thread is Vrai.

So have at it, what your thoughts on this subject, not just what happened here but this topic in general.
 

GW8345

Not White House Approved
To pick up where the other now deleted thread left off (from what I can remember);



Is society so mindless today that we must set reminders to take care of our children?

In the previous thread I’ve read that “it could happen to anyone”, “it was an accident”, it was a tragic “mistake”. As I’ve stated, actions have consequences and one of the consequences of not paying attention to the important things in life, your children, is injury/death.

Now people are saying that it must be nice to be a perfect parent since I’ve never had this situation happen to me, well the thing is, I’m not a perfect parent, far from it, but I strive every day to be one. I consciously think about the welfare of my children, just like millions of parents do, every day, and like other parents, I am aware that my actions directly impact the welfare of my children. This parent didn’t and we are now discussing the results of his actions. I’ve heard the excuse “he was on auto-pilot” and other excuses that justify his actions, well; there is no excuse to justify his actions. Just like a drunk driver has an excuse for his actions (their drinking is a disease), this parent does not have a valid excuse for leaving his child in a hot car, even after he went and drove it a meeting in the middle of the day.

This isn’t about being a perfect parent, there is no such thing as a perfect parent (IMO), it’s an unattainable goal but no matter what, it’s still worth striving to achieve. One must think about one’s actions and how they affect other’s, look at the affect this parent’s actions had, a child is dead, a mother has lost not only her child but her marriage and her life will never be the same, she has probably lost the trust she once had for her husband (that trust will never be regained), the man she loved will never be the same, a brother has lost his sibling, his relationship with his father has forever changed and not for the good, the grandparents have lost a grandchild and are now caught up in the middle of this situation. Your actions just don’t just affect you, it affects everyone around you.

Now people say don’t judge, well if we don’t judge a person’s bad behavior and actions as a society are we ever going to make society a better place? Look at society today, it’s a blameless society, when someone does something bad it’s because of some external reason or disease, hardly anyone takes responsibility for their actions anymore. People say we shouldn’t shame this person, that they already have enough guilt, to that, I say BS. This person should have thought about the consequences of his actions before he did them, afterwards is too late. Part of being held accountable for your actions is taking the punishment, as part of the punishment is being judged by your peers (society) and shaming is a way we as a society voice our displeasure of one’s actions.

As I’ve stated, this is not an accident, an accident is something that can’t be avoided, a mistake is something that is just a harmless inconvenience; a mistake is bouncing a check or forgetting to put gas in your car. When a person is injured or killed due to negligence, that is not an accident or mistake, it’s the actions of an irresponsible person and is 100% avoidable. There were several times this incident could have been avoided, but the father ignored every one of them and now we are discussing the end result.

I feel, as a society, we need to stop making excuses for these kinds of actions, for making excuses alleviates the person of their responsibility and partially absolves them of the guilt. The “it wasn’t his fault, his brain was in auto-pilot”, the “it was an honest mistake”, the “it was an accident” only re-enforces to society that this behavior, while tragic, is acceptable to a degree. There is no acceptance for leaving your child in a hot car because you are too absorbed in something else besides that most important thing in your life, that child.
 

Chris0nllyn

Well-Known Member
I think the media makes it out to be some sort of "growing trend".

Now, this new found fear and soccer moms getting all nutty has caused people to get locked up for seemingly innocent "crimes".
 

mAlice

professional daydreamer
What I took away from that thread, is that we live in a community with compassion, despite those who are lacking. That people can be callous and judgemental, without a care for innocent bystander, and that their opinion is more important to them, than the pain it may cause someone else.

RIP Baby Jurek, and I hope your family finds comfort and peace.
 

Larry Gude

Strung Out
Since the OP of the now deleted thread got all butt hurt that people actually had strong opinions and deleted the previous thread here is a new thread for open discussion. You don’t have to worry about this thread being deleted since I’m not a premo member and the only person who could delete this thread is Vrai.

So have at it, what your thoughts on this subject, not just what happened here but this topic in general.

My thought is you are ####ign a hole extraordinaire. Bag Girl was very clear in her reasoning, very eloquent and heart felt and to denigrate her by describing it as 'butt hurt' makes you a ####ing jerk.

So, what are you're thoughts, A hole? Are you a ####ing a hole extraordinaire? A jerk? Do you come by it naturally or do you have to practice?
 

MMM_donuts

New Member
I think your paraphrasing is biased, inaccurate, and unfair.

I believe I've already stated just about all of my opinions in the original thread. I'm not trying to change anyone's mind or have them cross over to my side of the argument, I simply wanted to share my perspective and offer some insight to my reasoning. I think it's a bit redundant to do it again and the intent behind this thread feels dirty so I'm not really interested in participating anymore beyond this post.

I'm a little disappointed that our conversation was deleted but it wasn't my thread and I understand the intent behind deleting it.
 

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
Sorry, folks, every single person I've relayed this story to has said, "How in the hell does that happen??"

It's negligence, pure and simple, and I'm sure that guy feels beyond devastated but that doesn't negate the reality of the situation. Rather than give him sympathy, why wouldn't we be reminding parents to be more mindful when it comes to their children? That their child is more important than their work, or their errands, or their phone calls? To soft peddle and white wash it does a disservice to that baby. Call it what it is: negligence. And this guy paid an enormous price for his.

People, pay attention to your children. Be aware of them. Get off the goddamn phone. When you have your child in your presence that should be your focus and the most important thing to you - their safety.

Feel free to get all pissed off and call me names - I don't give a damn.
 

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
PS, I'm pretty sure BG deleted the thread because it devolved (surprise surprise) into a bunch of idiocy and name-calling from people who should have more decency than to act like that in such a serious thread. It's a sensitive topic and I don't blame her for shutting it down once the drunken brawl started.
 

GW8345

Not White House Approved
My thought is you are ####ign a hole extraordinaire. Bag Girl was very clear in her reasoning, very eloquent and heart felt and to denigrate her by describing it as 'butt hurt' makes you a ####ing jerk.

So, what are you're thoughts, A hole? Are you a ####ing a hole extraordinaire? A jerk? Do you come by it naturally or do you have to practice?

BG deleted a thread that had over 400 responses to it without even a word, she could have just started a new thread but no, she threw a temper tantrum and deleted an ongoing discussion because she didn’t like the way it was going.

If she wanted that thread to be just a condolence thread she should have said it in the very first post. Not once in the life of that thread did she mention that it was supposed to be just a condolence thread, don’t you think she could have at least mentioned it once before she got on her high horse and decided to delete what other’s wrote?

Funny how she can run around here and call other’s names but when someone calls her out for a childish act, you get all butt hurt and defensive.

And to be called an eff’ing a hole extraordinaire by one of the forums biggest a-holes means about >< much.
 

MMDad

Lem Putt
an accident is something that can’t be avoided,
Looks like you need to use a dictionary. Most of us understand the meanings of words and they make sense. Since you don't understand what words mean, it's easy to see how you have become so confused.

Conveniently, the word accident is close to the word asshole, so you'll be able to look at what Larry called you too.
 

Larry Gude

Strung Out
Sorry, folks, every single person I've relayed this story to has said, "How in the hell does that happen??"

It's negligence, pure and simple, and I'm sure that guy feels beyond devastated but that doesn't negate the reality of the situation. Rather than give him sympathy, why wouldn't we be reminding parents to be more mindful when it comes to their children? That their child is more important than their work, or their errands, or their phone calls? To soft peddle and white wash it does a disservice to that baby. Call it what it is: negligence. And this guy paid an enormous price for his.

People, pay attention to your children. Be aware of them. Get off the goddamn phone. When you have your child in your presence that should be your focus and the most important thing to you - their safety.

Feel free to get all pissed off and call me names - I don't give a damn.

Yup. Best for us all to say 'there but for the grace of god go I' (did I get that right?) and take something good from this horror; a reminder.
 

mitzi

Well-Known Member
Sorry, folks, every single person I've relayed this story to has said, "How in the hell does that happen??"

It's negligence, pure and simple, and I'm sure that guy feels beyond devastated but that doesn't negate the reality of the situation. Rather than give him sympathy, why wouldn't we be reminding parents to be more mindful when it comes to their children? That their child is more important than their work, or their errands, or their phone calls? To soft peddle and white wash it does a disservice to that baby. Call it what it is: negligence. And this guy paid an enormous price for his.

People, pay attention to your children. Be aware of them. Get off the goddamn phone. When you have your child in your presence that should be your focus and the most important thing to you - their safety.

Feel free to get all pissed off and call me names - I don't give a damn.

:yay::yay::yay:
 

GW8345

Not White House Approved
PS, I'm pretty sure BG deleted the thread because it devolved (surprise surprise) into a bunch of idiocy and name-calling from people who should have more decency than to act like that in such a serious thread. It's a sensitive topic and I don't blame her for shutting it down once the drunken brawl started.

Could she not just delete those posts instead of the who thread, after all, she was the "owner" of that thread?
 

KDENISE977

New Member
Sorry, folks, every single person I've relayed this story to has said, "How in the hell does that happen??"

It's negligence, pure and simple, and I'm sure that guy feels beyond devastated but that doesn't negate the reality of the situation. Rather than give him sympathy, why wouldn't we be reminding parents to be more mindful when it comes to their children? That their child is more important than their work, or their errands, or their phone calls? To soft peddle and white wash it does a disservice to that baby. Call it what it is: negligence. And this guy paid an enormous price for his.

People, pay attention to your children. Be aware of them. Get off the goddamn phone. When you have your child in your presence that should be your focus and the most important thing to you - their safety.

Feel free to get all pissed off and call me names - I don't give a damn.

AMEN...thank you....this is EXACTLY how I feel. And when my husband and I spoke about it, he said I wouldn't have to kill him, he'd do it himself. He also stated this COULD NEVER happen, it's not possible. Do I feel bad for the guy, sure but it can't be made better by saying "oh, he will live with this the rest of his life" NOPE.
 

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
Yup. Best for us all to say 'there but for the grace of god go I' (did I get that right?) and take something good from this horror; a reminder.

No, not "there but for the grace of god". God had nothing to do with that baby's death. It wasn't "one of those things" and it didn't "just happen". Allow this man to take responsibility for what he did. That is the only way he'll heal, is to come to terms with it and shine a cold hard light on it. Pooh poohing it will never let it heal.
 

mitzi

Well-Known Member
PS, I'm pretty sure BG deleted the thread because it devolved (surprise surprise) into a bunch of idiocy and name-calling from people who should have more decency than to act like that in such a serious thread. It's a sensitive topic and I don't blame her for shutting it down once the drunken brawl started.

:yay::yay::yay:
 

MMM_donuts

New Member
BG deleted a thread that had over 400 responses to it without even a word, she could have just started a new thread but no, she threw a temper tantrum and deleted an ongoing discussion because she didn&rsquo;t like the way it was going. If she wanted that thread to be just a condolence thread she should have said it in the very first post. Not once in the life of that thread did she mention that it was supposed to be just a condolence thread, don&rsquo;t you think she could have at least mentioned it once before she got on her high horse and decided to delete what other&rsquo;s wrote? Funny how she can run around here and call other&rsquo;s names but when someone calls her out for a childish act, you get all butt hurt and defensive. And to be called an eff&rsquo;ing a hole extraordinaire by one of the forums biggest a-holes means about >< much.

This isn't an open discussion. This is a thread started specifically to promote your own opinion as a majority and attack those whose opinions are different from your own.
 
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