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Thread: Cooking Lessons

  1. #1
    Darwin was right GopherM's Avatar
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    Cooking Lessons

    Sorry if this has been posted already...still funny even if it is a repeat.

    A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly, her
    husband burst into the kitchen. 'Careful,' he said, 'CAREFUL! Put in some
    more butter! Oh my gosh! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn
    them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my gosh! WHERE are we going to
    get MORE BUTTER? They're going to STICK! Careful. CAREFUL! I said be
    CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you're cooking! Never! Turn them!
    Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don't forget to salt
    them.. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the! Salt. USE THE
    SALT! THE SALT!'

    The wife stared at him. 'What in the world is wrong with
    you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?'

    The husband > calmly replied, 'I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm
    driving.'
    Some days it hardly seems worth the effort to gnaw through the restraints!

  2. #2
    Board Mommy vraiblonde's Avatar
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    Did Monello tell you to post that?
    "Too much agreement kills a chat."
    ~Eldridge Cleaver

  3. #3
    ... smdavis65's Avatar
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    Should he have? It kind of sounds like he should have.
    I'm just sayin'...

  4. #4
    Board Mommy vraiblonde's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by smdavis65 View Post
    Should he have? It kind of sounds like he should have.
    Well look what the cat drug in!
    "Too much agreement kills a chat."
    ~Eldridge Cleaver

  5. #5
    Quote Originally Posted by vraiblonde View Post
    Did Monello tell you to post that?
    This question is funnier than the joke
    There are only two possibilities; one is that we are alone in the universe, the other is that we are not.
    Both are terrifying.

  6. #6
    ... smdavis65's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by vraiblonde View Post
    Well look what the cat drug in!
    I'm just sayin'...

  7. #7
    I Need a Life luvmygdaughters's Avatar
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    This isnt a joke, but still damn funny, at least to me. When I was a kid staying at my grandparents house for the summer, my grandmother had cooked some steaks for dinner. When my grandfather cut his steak and took a bite, he complained that the steak was tough. He said this every time he took a bite and kept complaining about how tough it was. Finally, the last remark he made was " Bessie, are you sure didnt fry up horsemeat instead of a steak! My grandmother, who I can never remember cussing, replied, "Tom, I dont know if its horsemeat or not, but I do know there is a jackass eating it!"

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