Why did the Chicken Cross the Road?

Christy

b*tch rocket
GEORGE W. BUSH
We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the
chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us.
There is no middle ground here.
AL GORE
I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken crossing the road
represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new,
reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.
COLIN POWELL
Now at the left of the screen, you clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing
the road.
HANZ BLIX
We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed access
to the other side of the road.
MOHAMMED ALDOURI (Iraq ambassador)
The chicken did not cross the road. This is a complete
fabrication. We don't even have a chicken.
SADDAM HUSSEIN
This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite
justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.
RALPH NADER
The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted by unchecked
industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of
the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
PAT BUCHANAN
To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.
RUSH LIMBAUGH
I don't know why the chicken crossed the road, but I'll bet it was getting a government
grant to cross the road, and I'll bet someone out there is already forming a support group
to help chickens with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much
more of this can
real Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I
say tax dollars, I'm talking about your money, money the government took from you to
build roads for chickens to cross.
MARTHA STEWART
No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at
the farmer's market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a certain level. No little
bird gave me any insider information.
JERRY FALWELL
Because the chicken was gay! Isn't it obvious? Can't you people see the plain truth in
front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." That's what they call it -- the
other side. Yes, my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will
become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this
abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like
"the other side."
DR. SEUSS
Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes,the chicken crossed the
road, But why it crossed, I've not been told!
ERNEST HEMINGWAY
To die. In the rain. Alone.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their
motives called into question.
GRANDPA
In my day, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the
chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
BARBARA WALTERS
Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first
time, the heart-warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went
on to accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road.
JOHN LENNON
Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.
ARISTOTLE
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
KARL MARX
It was an historical inevitability.
VOLTAIRE
I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death its right to do it.
RONALD REAGAN
What chicken?
CAPTAIN KIRK
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
FOX MULDER
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have to cross
before you believe it?
SIGMUND FREUD
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your
underlying sexual insecurity.
BILL GATES
I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file
your important documents, and balance your checkbook -and Internet Explorer is an
inextricable part of eChicken.
ALBERT EINSTEIN
Did the chicken really cross the road? Or rather, did the road move giving you the illusion
that the chicken moved, when in fact it was the road that moved?
BILL CLINTON
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you
define chicken, please?
THE BIBLE
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, "Thou shalt cross
the road." And the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.
COLONEL SANDERS
I missed one?
 
Top