Search results

  1. S

    Endless Caverns

    So we took our inaugural trip of the season last weekend, pulling our travel trailer to Endless Caverns in New Market, VA. I had seen the sign for it last year - before our country turned upside down - while driving south on I-81 on our way to visit the in-laws, and checked it out online a few...
  2. S

    RV Camping near West Point

    Hello All, My wife and I would like to bring our travel trailer up to West Point for our son's graduation (from the prep school) in May. I've spent a couple hours running google searches but their doesn't seem to be many options. Does anyone have a suggestion? Thanks in advance! - Jeff in Owings
  3. S

    Terrorist Teacher

    A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and a calculator. At a morning press conference, the Attorney General said he believes the man is a member...
  4. S

    The Monastery

    A guy joins a monastery and takes a vow of silence: he's allowed to say two words every seven years. After the first seven years, the elders bring him in and ask for his two words. "Cold floors," he says. They nod and send him away. Seven more years pass. They bring him back in and ask for...
  5. S

    Gotta Love Those Canadians

    A Canadian is drinking in a New York bar.... He gets a call on his cell phone. He hangs up, grinning from ear to ear & orders a round of drinks for everybody in the bar because, he announces, his wife has just produced a typical Canadian baby boy weighing 25 pounds. Nobody can believe that any...
  6. S

    Blond Guy

    A blonde guy gets home early from work and hears strange noises coming from the bedroom. He rushes upstairs to find his wife naked on the bed, sweating and panting. "What's up?" he says. "I'm having a heart attack," cries the woman. He rushes downstairs to grab the phone, but just as...
  7. S

    The Mexican Maid

    A Mexican maid asked for a pay increase. The wife was very upset about this and asked: "Now Maria, why do you want a pay increase?" Maria: "Well Señora, there are three reasons why I want an increase. The first is that I iron better than you." Wife: "Who said you iron better than me?"...
  8. S

    Adam & God

    God said, "Adam, I want you to do something for me." Adam said, "Gladly, what do you want me to do?" God said, "Go down into that valley." Adam said, "What's a valley?" God explained it to him. Then God said, "Cross the river." Adam said, "What's a river?" God explained that to...
  9. S

    A guy walks into a doctor's office..

    A man goes into a doctor's office and says, "Help! I think I'm a moth!" The doctor says, "Well, I can't help you, I'm only a General Practitioner. You need the psychiatrist next door. Why on earth did you come to me?" And the man says, "Your light was on."
  10. S

    The three legged chicken

    John was driving his pickup down a country lane, when suddenly a chicken darts out into the road in front of him. He's just about to slam on his brakes to avoid the chicken when he realizes that the chicken has sped on ahead doing about 30 miles per hour. Amazed, he sped up to follow, but...
  11. S

    Baby Hermaphrodite

    A woman goes to the hospital to have a baby. Doctor: "I'm sorry ma'am. Your baby has been born a hermaphrodite." Mother: "What is a hermaphrodite?" Doctor: "It means your baby has both male and female organs." Mother: "What, a penis AND a brain?"
  12. S

    Redneck Birth Control

    After having their 11th child, a Kentucky couple decided that was enough(they could not afford a larger double wide). So, the husband went to his doctor (who also treated mules) and told him that he and his wife/cousin didn't want to have any more children. The doctor told him that there...
  13. S

    Dog joke

    A dog went to a telegram office, took out a blank form and wrote: "Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof. Woof." The clerk examined the paper and politely told the dog, "There are only nine words here. You could send another 'Woof' for the same price." To which the dog replied...
  14. S

    Golf Accident

    Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next hole. The ball hit one of the men. He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the ground and proceeded to roll around in agony. The woman...
  15. S

    How to Use the Government Rebate

    As you may have heard, the Bush Administration announced recently that almost every one of us taxpayers will get a nice rebate check soon from the U.S. Government: $300 to $600 for individuals, and another $200 for each dependent child. The declared purpose of this rebate is to stimulate the...
  16. S

    Message from Osama

    After numerous rounds of "We don't even know if Osama is still alive", Osama himself decided to send Hillary Clinton a letter in his own handwriting to let the US know he was still in the game. Hillary opened the letter and it contained a single line of coded message: 370H-SSV-0773H...
  17. S

    The deaf bookkeeper

    A mafia Godfather suspects his deaf bookkeeper has embezzled money from him. He has him hauled in for questioning through his attorney, who knows sign language. The Godfather asks the deaf bookkeeper: "where is the 10 million bucks you embezzled from me?" The attorney, using sign language...
  18. S

    Two Old Ladies

    Two elderly ladies are sitting on the porch in their rockers just talking 'girl' talk. Emma: My word, Matilda! You and Johnny were married for quite some time. How many years was that anyway? Matilda: Oh, we were married for 65 wonderous years. Emma: My-oh-my-oh-my! But can you tell...
  19. S

    dry cereal

    There was a boy playing in the farm field when his mom called him in for breakfast. On his way in he kicked a cow, pig, and a chicken. So when he gets to the table he sees a dry bowl of cereal. "What's the deal?" he asks. His mom says " You kicked the cow so no milk for you, you kicked the pig...
  20. S

    Democrat, Republican or SOMD?

    For those of you are trying to decide your party this year, the following test will certainly help! Oh yeah ... GOTTA LOVE THOSE SOUTHERNERS! Here is a little test that will help you decide. he answer can be found by posing the following question: You're walking down a deserted street...
Top