11 Things Every Real Conservative Should Ask On A First Date

[GURPS]

Recently, a young being – I don’t want to presume its gender identity, but it’ll probably throw a hissy fit about my blatant chrono-shaming anyway – scribbled an article titled 10 Things Every Intersectional Feminist Should Ask On a First Date for his/her/xir fellow liberal freaks. It’s an illuminating view into the twisted minds of the SJWs, but the article never answers the first question we all asked ourselves reading the title: “Why the hell would anyone ever date an intersectional feminist?”

Masochism? Threats? Lost a bet?

Anyway, her/his/xir article is meant to help her/his/xir readers determine whether their prospective mates will be adequate “accomplices in the fight against white supremacy, queerphobia, and misogyny” because “f you’re not going to support marginalized folks, then we can’t be friends, let alone date. The personal is political.” Wow, he/she/xe seems super fun, huh?

We Normals seek accomplices in reproduction, while SJWs seek accomplices in ideological onanism. Take solace in the fact that we are totally going to outbreed these lunatics.

But as conservatives, it’s vital that we also do some screening of our own. After all, the last thing we want to do is inadvertently turn down a Darwinian not-a-through-street and spawn more liberals. I’m out of the dating game thanks to my closed-minded, heavily-armed, hot American-Cuban wife, but let me try to help out you singleberries with some questions to assist you in detecting any right-swipes who are actually covert leftist weirdos, losers, and/or mutations.


11 Things Every Real Conservative Should Ask On A First Date


I'm thinking this gets covered in the 'pre' 1st date email exchange ...

 

[glhs837]

6. What is your understanding of settler colonialism?

Your date must understand that it is awesome.

The greatest achievement of the last thousand years was the European settlement of North America (South America – whatever) and the building of the nation that is the greatest beacon of justice and freedom in human history – the United States of America.

Love this bit More freedom for more peoples

 

[transporter]

And here again we see hope for the future of America. Just like the vote in Al where common decency appears to have won the day, this "questionnaire" provides a ray of sunshine on a dark and troubled nation.

"Real conservatives" (whatever the hell that means) should pass a law thru their propaganda media sites stating that all young males who are "real conservatives" MUST ask these 11 questions of every potential dating partner. The questionnaire should be signed and submitted to the propaganda media sites for scoring. The young males will only be allowed to proceed to date young females who score 100%.

Since no young females are likely to ever score 100%, this generation will be the last that contains "real conservatives".

The "real progressives" should create a similar test for their "real progressive" young females. A test no male will pass with 100%. No more "real progressives".

All we have left are people in the middle of the political spectrum. People with common sense, a respect for each other, the ability to come to agreements that benefit all--not just a few, the understanding that scientific research is key to social, economic and technological progress.

 

[glhs837]

And here again we see hope for the future of America. Just like the vote in Al where common decency appears to have won the day, this "questionnaire" provides a ray of sunshine on a dark and troubled nation.

"Real conservatives" (whatever the hell that means) should pass a law thru their propaganda media sites stating that all young males who are "real conservatives" MUST ask these 11 questions of every potential dating partner. The questionnaire should be signed and submitted to the propaganda media sites for scoring. The young males will only be allowed to proceed to date young females who score 100%.

Since no young females are likely to ever score 100%, this generation will be the last that contains "real conservatives".

The "real progressives" should create a similar test for their "real progressive" young females. A test no male will pass with 100%. No more "real progressives".

All we have left are people in the middle of the political spectrum. People with common sense, a respect for each other, the ability to come to agreements that benefit all--not just a few, the understanding that scientific research is key to social, economic and technological progress.

These are the jokes, man......

 

[vraiblonde]

I'm thinking this gets covered in the 'pre' 1st date email exchange ...

Whether it was a dating site person or someone I met the old-fashioned way, I always made it clear to my prospect that progs need not apply. Fortunately I didn't date women or gay men, so it was rarely a problem.

 

[Gilligan]

... a dark and troubled nation..

The only thing "dark and troubled" is you, sugar britches.