ZARA
Registered User
A 95 year old lady walks into a bank and heads directly to the first available teller. The bank teller smiles and asks what she can do for her. “Well dear, my name is Mrs. Shaw and I would like to make a very large deposit but I like to know who I am doing business with, so would you tell the bank president I would like to meet with him?” “Yes ma’am. Would you mind waiting in the lobby and one of us will be right with you,” the bank teller replies and walks off to deliver the message.
A few minutes pass and a gentleman walks over and greets Mrs. Shaw. “Hello Mrs. Shaw, I’m Mr. Frayer, the bank president. Come to my office and we can talk.” Mrs. Shaw follows Mr. Frayer to his office and takes a seat. “I hear you would like to make a deposit?” “Yes, I have a very large sum I would like to deposit but I won’t do business without meeting the person I am doing business with. Good business practices my daddy taught me,” Mrs. Shaw replies. “Yes ma’am, they are. Now how much would you like to deposit in our fine institution?” Mrs. Shaw ponders the question for a moment and says, “Well, I believe I will start out with $200k and then more later if I like the way you do business.” Mr. Frayer smiles, quite pleased and a slightly curious, “That sounds right fine Mrs. Shaw. Do you mind me asking how you came across so much money?” Mrs. Shaw grins like a Cheshire cat and says, “I make bets.”
Mr. Frayer raises his brow, curiosity piqued, “What kind of bets?” “Well, for instance, I bet you $50k that your testes are square.” “I assure you ma’am, my testes are not square.” “Even so, I still bet you $50k that your testes are square.” Mr. Frayer thinks about the bet, somewhat taken aback, and replies, “But you can’t possibly win.” “Then it’s a bet?” Mrs. Shaw asks. “It’s a bet.”
Mrs. Shaw stands up and says, “Good. Now since we are dealing with such a large sum of money, I would like to have my lawyer draw up the contract and I would like to inspect your testes to make sure you aren’t cheating.” Mr. Frayer nods and replies, “That sounds reasonable since it is such a large sum of money. Shall we meet back in my office tomorrow morning at nine?” “I will see you in the morning,” Mrs. Shaw and Mr. Frayer shake hands and then Mrs. Shaw leaves.
The next morning Mrs. Shaw arrives with her lawyer and the two are taken to Mr. Frayer’s office. “Good morning Mrs. Shaw! It is good to see you. I see you have your lawyer and I trust the contract as well?” “Yes, here is the contract, please take your time and read over it before you sign it and make sure everything is in order per our agreement.” Mr. Frayer reads the contract, smiling he looks up at Mrs. Shaw and says, “Yes. Everything looks to be in perfect order. Do you want to inspect now?” “Yes, if you don’t mind. I need to be sure.” Mr. Frayer walks around to the front of the desk while dropping his drawers he says, “Yes, of course you need to be sure.” Mrs. Shaw asks, “Do you mind if I feel them? I need to be sure your testes aren’t square.” Mr. Frayer shrugs, “No, I don’t mind.”
*BANG
BANG BANG*
“Mrs. Shaw, why is your lawyer banging his head against the wall?” “Oh he’s just mad he lost the bet.” “What bet was that Mrs. Shaw?” “I bet him $300k that I would be holding the bank president’s testicles in my hands today.”
A few minutes pass and a gentleman walks over and greets Mrs. Shaw. “Hello Mrs. Shaw, I’m Mr. Frayer, the bank president. Come to my office and we can talk.” Mrs. Shaw follows Mr. Frayer to his office and takes a seat. “I hear you would like to make a deposit?” “Yes, I have a very large sum I would like to deposit but I won’t do business without meeting the person I am doing business with. Good business practices my daddy taught me,” Mrs. Shaw replies. “Yes ma’am, they are. Now how much would you like to deposit in our fine institution?” Mrs. Shaw ponders the question for a moment and says, “Well, I believe I will start out with $200k and then more later if I like the way you do business.” Mr. Frayer smiles, quite pleased and a slightly curious, “That sounds right fine Mrs. Shaw. Do you mind me asking how you came across so much money?” Mrs. Shaw grins like a Cheshire cat and says, “I make bets.”
Mr. Frayer raises his brow, curiosity piqued, “What kind of bets?” “Well, for instance, I bet you $50k that your testes are square.” “I assure you ma’am, my testes are not square.” “Even so, I still bet you $50k that your testes are square.” Mr. Frayer thinks about the bet, somewhat taken aback, and replies, “But you can’t possibly win.” “Then it’s a bet?” Mrs. Shaw asks. “It’s a bet.”
Mrs. Shaw stands up and says, “Good. Now since we are dealing with such a large sum of money, I would like to have my lawyer draw up the contract and I would like to inspect your testes to make sure you aren’t cheating.” Mr. Frayer nods and replies, “That sounds reasonable since it is such a large sum of money. Shall we meet back in my office tomorrow morning at nine?” “I will see you in the morning,” Mrs. Shaw and Mr. Frayer shake hands and then Mrs. Shaw leaves.
The next morning Mrs. Shaw arrives with her lawyer and the two are taken to Mr. Frayer’s office. “Good morning Mrs. Shaw! It is good to see you. I see you have your lawyer and I trust the contract as well?” “Yes, here is the contract, please take your time and read over it before you sign it and make sure everything is in order per our agreement.” Mr. Frayer reads the contract, smiling he looks up at Mrs. Shaw and says, “Yes. Everything looks to be in perfect order. Do you want to inspect now?” “Yes, if you don’t mind. I need to be sure.” Mr. Frayer walks around to the front of the desk while dropping his drawers he says, “Yes, of course you need to be sure.” Mrs. Shaw asks, “Do you mind if I feel them? I need to be sure your testes aren’t square.” Mr. Frayer shrugs, “No, I don’t mind.”
*BANG
BANG BANG* “Mrs. Shaw, why is your lawyer banging his head against the wall?” “Oh he’s just mad he lost the bet.” “What bet was that Mrs. Shaw?” “I bet him $300k that I would be holding the bank president’s testicles in my hands today.”