OK - I am not a DB expert, but understand enough to get myself in trouble, so here it goes - I still do not understand what you are trying to do so here it goes;
I talked to my SQL guy and he believes Access is not flexible enough to do this, but this is how it is done in SQL...
You need to join both tables. Then create a query statement and in the "where" statement when you have a NULL return value this will be the items in the tables which are not the same (based on the where querey)... from there, the NULLS can be displayed or placed in a third table.