lots of reasons contribute
Sittnig here wondering what makes a child bully, is it attention? They want to show off? When you get a certain age you know right from wrong, if your kid is being a bully in I guess 5th grade and below they don't know better, but if they are older they know wtf they are doing.
Many times, it's actually from insecurity, or sadly from modeling by family members. As a prior clinician, I saw children in domestic violence shelters as young as two year's old modeling the aggressor's behavior! I watched in awe as a two year old boy hit his mother in the face, while she was trying to kiss him!
Children as young as preschool age can feel anger and learning how to handle that feeling is the job of the parent and teachers in school. Children are in school about 8 hours a day, and learn from those around them how to handle awkward situations. Schools SHOULD educate children and include workshops on this. Look at the shootings all around us. Look at the people who don't talk about why they are upset. It starts in preschool and goes way beyond 5th grade. Self esteem is very crucial from 6-12 as it develops. Crisis during the age bracket requires intervention. Kids get bigger and stronger then rather than using words (which hurt badly) it escalates.
I disagree, if you kid is being a bully in grade 5, they are already using a coping skill that would hurt others. They KNOW what they are doing and are somehow achieving results.
Also, if a child is uncomfortable, sometimes they want to make others feel uncomfortable. Middle school and high school years can be rough as the child is finding their way into the world, faces an increase in responsibility, peer pressure, and financial issues as they prepare for college.
Programs like DARE address drug use, touch on violence issues but we really need to increase awareness in our communities even more. Intervention begins at the Preschool level when a child learns how to deal with the biggest feeling inside of them (anger). Hitting and name calling is poor impulse control. Teach children better ways at a young age, and they may use them if it's reinforced later. Also, parents need to LISTEN and look for signals when a child comes to them, or turns feeling inward. Sadly, children may not feel they have anyone to turn to. Hopefully someone will notice.
Sorry for the rant. My recently son did his oratorical comp. speech on this subject and took second place for the boys. The statistics he revealed after doing his research show that it's getting worse and something has to be done!
Boys in our society may feel that expressing feelings is not "cool" or maybe it's even discouraged. This can lead to depression. We are human, have feelings and should recognize them.
Keep open communication with your kids, even if it's not the way you were taught. Stop the cycle. Stop the violence.
Help keep our world positive. Look at the good in your children, treat others with respect, teach them the same, and God Bless.