I graduated from Fordham University in 2020 with a bachelor’s degree in International Political Economy — an arduous four-year process that surely would be worth it in the end, I assured myself. But as it turns out, the fruits of my labor — going on national television, meeting high-ranking elected officials, and breaking important news — while fulfilling to a degree, simply do not satiate my growing appetite for the one thing I can’t do independently: have a family.
Throughout my college years, female students were encouraged to develop a sense of hyper-independence.
Get your degree. Enter the workforce. Rise to the top. You don’t need a man!
I would often hear from my lefty female professors that men are misogynists, women belong in the workforce just as much as any man, and having a family means battling a husband for an equal partnership in which you, the wife, can still have a full-time career in exchange for another woman raising the kids.
To be frank, the mentality imposed on my peers and me was to “be a boss b-tch.” We could have it all, we were told. And if we couldn’t find a man content with having a full-time working wife, then we simply didn’t need a man. Apparently, women could live their lives alone and thrive on spending nine-plus hours in an office daily before going home to their multiple cats and cheap reality television shows.
But we were duped by unhappy women and crunchy, emasculated men.
While I didn’t totally drink the Kool-Aid, I did begin to believe it was important — and necessary — to be well-established in my career before I could do anything else.
I faltered when I prioritized my career over everything else, including developing relationships that could lead to marriage and a family. I’ve become increasingly aware — and frankly upset — that I neglected to cultivate other avenues in my life in exchange for the ability to say, “I’m a working woman.”
Some might call me a misogynist, but this is no anti-woman screed. Being a woman is awesome.
But women don’t have to be just like men to find value and fulfillment. We have unique natural qualities, skills, instincts, and more — not to mention the incredible ability to cultivate the next generation with our own bodies. Talk about being a boss — we can do things men can only dream of!