Culkin too ugly for even Michael Jackson to molest.

[AC/DC]

SANTA MARIA, Calif. — Former child star Macaulay Culkin (search) took the witness stand Wednesday to testify for the defense in Michael Jackson's (search) child molestation trial, blasting allegations that he was once molested by the pop star as "ridiculous."

 

[nawty1]

Parents would certainly deny it, but Canadian researchers have made a startling assertion: parents take better care of pretty children than they do ugly ones.

Making more sense now!

 

[mAlice]

"Anyone who was a child performer," he said, "we keep an eye out for each other."

So, what he's saying here is he's got Wacko Jacko's back. Or...

Just what are you doing with those empty eyeball sockets?