Explaining death to little children
- Thread starter Tonio
- Start date
crabcake
But wait, there's more...
Sorry to hear of your GF-in-law's illness.
My daughter was about that age when her great grandmom passed away. We told her that she went to heaven to be with God, and that while she's not here in body, she'll always be with her in her heart.
At 2 1/2, she wasn't really cognizant of the fact that great-grandmom wasn't around anymore ... not because she didn't care, but because she was still sort of developing her "memory bank" ... I've asked her from time to time if she remembers great grandmom, and she has a puzzled look on her face. We tell her the story about how she was the last person to make great-gma laugh, but I don't think she really remembers is ... she just remembers what we've told her.
Hope that experience helps.
My daughter was about that age when her great grandmom passed away. We told her that she went to heaven to be with God, and that while she's not here in body, she'll always be with her in her heart.
At 2 1/2, she wasn't really cognizant of the fact that great-grandmom wasn't around anymore ... not because she didn't care, but because she was still sort of developing her "memory bank" ... I've asked her from time to time if she remembers great grandmom, and she has a puzzled look on her face. We tell her the story about how she was the last person to make great-gma laugh, but I don't think she really remembers is ... she just remembers what we've told her.
Hope that experience helps.
Elle
Happy Camper!
Sorry to hear what you are going through.
We aren’t really religious but do go to church from time to time and our son has always know the concept of God and that he is good so we have always told him that Pop-Pop (passed away when Tyler was 16 months old) and GeeGee (passed away when Tyler was 2) went to live with God in Heaven and that they are always watching and listening to him if he wants to talk to them. Today he still asks about Gee-Gee and talks to her on his own occasionally but obviously since he was soo young has no recollection of Pop-pop.
My grandfather is sick now and Tyler knows that one day he will go and live in heaven with God so that he will not be sick anymore. And on his own, Tyler has informed us that my grandfather will make friends with his other grandparents when he gets to heaven, so I think he understands.
We aren’t really religious but do go to church from time to time and our son has always know the concept of God and that he is good so we have always told him that Pop-Pop (passed away when Tyler was 16 months old) and GeeGee (passed away when Tyler was 2) went to live with God in Heaven and that they are always watching and listening to him if he wants to talk to them. Today he still asks about Gee-Gee and talks to her on his own occasionally but obviously since he was soo young has no recollection of Pop-pop.
My grandfather is sick now and Tyler knows that one day he will go and live in heaven with God so that he will not be sick anymore. And on his own, Tyler has informed us that my grandfather will make friends with his other grandparents when he gets to heaven, so I think he understands.
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Elle
Happy Camper!
Originally posted by sleuth14
obliviously, obviously, it's all the same.
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe and the biran fguiers it out aynawy. WOW!
sleuth
Livin' Like Thanksgivin'
Originally posted by tys_mommy
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe and the biran fguiers it out aynawy. WOW!
That's friggin' amazing. I actually read that pretty easily and quickly, although I stumbled on the word iprmoetnt.
Dymphna
Loyalty, Friendship, Love
I was 3 when my great-grandmother died. I remember her a little. I remember a sick little old lady, who was a little crazy. (she had altztimer's) I can't remember what my parents told me at the time but I'm sure it was something about going to Heaven, possibly about going to be with her husband, mother, etc. which was something she wanted to do. (in her demented state, she was always trying to go see them "down the road")
I also remember that it wasn't a great shock that she'd died, because I knew she was very sick and I'd been told that that's what happens when really old people get really sick.
Don't worry too much about your kid. They are pretty understanding about that kinda stuff. Tell him/her whatever fits your religious beliefs. Tell them "Grandpa's not in pain anymore." Wherever he's gone, he's not sick anymore.
I also remember that it wasn't a great shock that she'd died, because I knew she was very sick and I'd been told that that's what happens when really old people get really sick.
Don't worry too much about your kid. They are pretty understanding about that kinda stuff. Tell him/her whatever fits your religious beliefs. Tell them "Grandpa's not in pain anymore." Wherever he's gone, he's not sick anymore.
K
Kizzy
Guest
No matter what you decide to tell them, the one thing you want to avoid is telling them so-and-so went to sleep and will never wake up. I read that it is the worst thing you could ever tell a child that young, because it will cause sleeping problems. So, they left to be with God, Jesus whatever and they are in heaven watching over them is IMO the best way to handle it. My mother died when my oldest son was just a little over a year old, and I went the heaven route. You will find out when you tell them, they will only be sad a minute or two, move on and bring it up from time to time for about all of 30 seconds.
donbarzini
Well-Known Member
Originally posted by tys_mommy
Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe and the biran fguiers it out aynawy. WOW!
That is the funniest fargin' thing I have seen since my ex-wife tripped and fell in the courtroom
I have a novel idea - why not just tell them that the person died? Why not explain death to them young so they are comfortable with the concept later?
To me, talking about death with my kids was the same as talking about sex - very matter of fact and no biggie. Just a fact of life.
To me, talking about death with my kids was the same as talking about sex - very matter of fact and no biggie. Just a fact of life.