HELP!! Squirrel!!!!

[twinoaks207]

Hello fellow forumites! Please forgive my prolonged absence -- life got way too busy!

i am in search of a licensed professional who can remove the squirrel in my living room/dining room ceiling before he succeeds in his efforts to chew through my ceiling tiles (OLD house) and does a re-enactment of the squirrel scene from National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation movie!

Can anyone recommend a local company that will come to Northern Calvert today, or at least someone to call? I've got one company on call for tomorrow but this little devil has tried to chew through two tiles already and I am tired of being on "squirrel watch". I want him out and he can't seem to remember how he got in!

Any assistance is appreciated!

 

[Grumpy]

All County Pest Control (Rusty)

(410) 535-1863

 

[twinoaks207]

Thanks! Called but had to leave a message. Squirrel busy working his way through a ceiling tile again... I want to get him out before he dies of thirst or hunger. I have no idea how long he can go without water or food.

 

[RodRugg]

My grandma always calls Bill Stabbs in Leonardtown. He is a small person or dwarf or whatever and he will duke it out with any animal you have. You can invite as many people as you want to watch but if you invite more than 6 you have to pay him extra. My grandma used to use him to beat those possums senseless that hanged out in the garage and destroyed all her shoe lasts and vegetable crates. He knows several combat moves and can put himself just about anywhere plus he has tools including smoke to get animals really worked up and out in the open so everybody can see. He will go after squirrels, bats, leaf reapers, possums, raccoons, birds (including eagles), wasps, you name it. He will NOT fight pets that have got insane or escaped zoo animals but will attack most anything else. He uses safe methods that don't expose the inside of the animals or make them die unless they choose to go that route. Most of the time he just knocks them out and puts them in a bag or cage so everybody can see it up close when it's over. If the animal is small or slow or whatever he usually will knock it out a couple of times so that everybody gets their money's worth. He lives over by the fairgrounds and usually just waits outside for people to come pick him up and carry him to their house or where ever they need him.

 

[Gilligan]

 

[RoseRed]

My grandma always calls Bill Stabbs in Leonardtown. He is a small person or dwarf or whatever and he will duke it out with any animal you have. You can invite as many people as you want to watch but if you invite more than 6 you have to pay him extra. My grandma used to use him to beat those possums senseless that hanged out in the garage and destroyed all her shoe lasts and vegetable crates. He knows several combat moves and can put himself just about anywhere plus he has tools including smoke to get animals really worked up and out in the open so everybody can see. He will go after squirrels, bats, leaf reapers, possums, raccoons, birds (including eagles), wasps, you name it. He will NOT fight pets that have got insane or escaped zoo animals but will attack most anything else. He uses safe methods that don't expose the inside of the animals or make them die unless they choose to go that route. Most of the time he just knocks them out and puts them in a bag or cage so everybody can see it up close when it's over. If the animal is small or slow or whatever he usually will knock it out a couple of times so that everybody gets their money's worth. He lives over by the fairgrounds and usually just waits outside for people to come pick him up and carry him to their house or where ever they need him.

I've been waiting for this!

 

[twinoaks207]

UPDATE:

Moose = losing
Squirrel = winning

Found Wildlife Management guy. Came the same day, installed trap. Came back, worked on trap option B, settled for trap option C. More ceiling tile gone by chewing. On "ceiling tile watch", AGAIN. Wildlife guy will stop back today.

CONCLUSIONS:

1) Squirrel is too smart to go into trap.
2) Squirrel is either too dumb to get out the way he came in, or he's unable to get back out that way.
3) Squirrels can go at least 5 days without eating anything other than ceiling tiles.
4) Men dealing with this are frustrated with the lack of success.
5) Men are unwilling to take alternate suggestions if they come from a female.
6) Female is ready to leave the state to visit relatives & leave the men to watch the entire ceiling get eaten.



#teachersummervacationadventures

 

[GWguy]

Not many options. If he doesn't go in the trap he'll die, but you don't really know that he isn't getting food/water from somewhere. Might be time to consider a toxic option and end the prolonged suffering for both of you.

 

[jazz lady]

UPDATE:

Moose = losing
Squirrel = winning

Found Wildlife Management guy. Came the same day, installed trap. Came back, worked on trap option B, settled for trap option C. More ceiling tile gone by chewing. On "ceiling tile watch", AGAIN. Wildlife guy will stop back today.

CONCLUSIONS:

1) Squirrel is too smart to go into trap.
2) Squirrel is either too dumb to get out the way he came in, or he's unable to get back out that way.
3) Squirrels can go at least 5 days without eating anything other than ceiling tiles.
4) Men dealing with this are frustrated with the lack of success.
5) Men are unwilling to take alternate suggestions if they come from a female.
6) Female is ready to leave the state to visit relatives & leave the men to watch the entire ceiling get eaten.



#teachersummervacationadventures

You should be filming this. And I would opt for #6 and just do it.

 

[vraiblonde]

Install a bird feeder. Squirrels can't resist a bird feeder, especially if you take a lot of time to squirrel-proof it.

It appears, however, that squirrels really like ceiling tiles. Maybe try baiting the trap with that?

I'm presuming there's an escape route for the squirrel, an attic window or something? How about borrowing a cat and setting it loose up there to chase the squirrel out? <---that's actually a real suggestion.

 

[BOP]

UPDATE:

Moose = losing
Squirrel = winning

Found Wildlife Management guy. Came the same day, installed trap. Came back, worked on trap option B, settled for trap option C. More ceiling tile gone by chewing. On "ceiling tile watch", AGAIN. Wildlife guy will stop back today.

CONCLUSIONS:

1) Squirrel is too smart to go into trap.
2) Squirrel is either too dumb to get out the way he came in, or he's unable to get back out that way.
3) Squirrels can go at least 5 days without eating anything other than ceiling tiles.
4) Men dealing with this are frustrated with the lack of success.
5) Men are unwilling to take alternate suggestions if they come from a female.
6) Female is ready to leave the state to visit relatives & leave the men to watch the entire ceiling get eaten.



#teachersummervacationadventures

You just have to know how to parse it. "Sir, didn't you say that if all else fails, we might try to do x_______"? If that doesn't resonate, try "my daddy used to do x____. What do you think? "

 

[Misfit]

I did some research and it appears Coyotes eat squirrels.

Tell the Men to get a Coyote, make it mad by not feeding it and beating it with a sock full of nickels. Then they just need to stuff it in the ceiling, drink beer and wait.

 

[RoseRed]

I did some research and it appears Coyotes eat squirrels.

Tell the Men to get a Coyote, make it mad by not feeding it and beating it with a sock full of nickels. Then they just need to stuff it in the ceiling, drink beer and wait.

Are you filling in for RoddRugg today?

 

[twinoaks207]

You should be filming this. And I would opt for #6 and just do it.

I should! I could go viral!
Seriously considering #6 but there are some health concerns.

You just have to know how to parse it. "Sir, didn't you say that if all else fails, we might try to do x_______"? If that doesn't resonate, try "my daddy used to do x____. What do you think? "

I think I'd still get the "little woman, what does she know, pat on the head".

Install a bird feeder. Squirrels can't resist a bird feeder, especially if you take a lot of time to squirrel-proof it.

It appears, however, that squirrels really like ceiling tiles. Maybe try baiting the trap with that?

I'm presuming there's an escape route for the squirrel, an attic window or something? How about borrowing a cat and setting it loose up there to chase the squirrel out? <---that's actually a real suggestion.

He wants out & he appears smart enough to know a kill trap when he sees it. At this point, I'd rather have him make it out alive, but that could change by this evening. I don't think he can get back out the way he came in as he hasn't succeeded in doing it yet. We've figured out that he came in through a hole beside the chimney. I think he fell a little ways & can't get traction to get back out that way.

The cat is an outdoor car as we all have allergies (some severe) so that would be worse than the ceiling tiles. Although, it would definitely work!

Wildlife guy seemed to think the female idea might work so will try again. Sigh....

 

[Gilligan]

I did some research and it appears Coyotes eat squirrels.

Tell the Men to get a Coyote, make it mad by not feeding it and beating it with a sock full of nickels. Then they just need to stuff it in the ceiling, drink beer and wait.

 

[Kyle]

I did some research and it appears Coyotes eat squirrels.

Tell the Men to get a Coyote, make it mad by not feeding it and beating it with a sock full of nickels. Then they just need to stuff it in the ceiling, drink beer and wait.

RodRugg?

 

[RodRugg]

Did you check on Bill Stabbs? I saw him standing in his driveway this morning but it looked like he was waiting for somebody to pick him up because he had some garbage bags, a twitcher's pole, and a gallon of lemonade (for him). Also you could try that Amish guy that lives down from Bill. He don't attack animals but he makes stuff out of glued up dust that looks real. He mostly does Jesus babies for Christmas or Abraham Lincolns for other holidays but he can also do animals because one time my uncle Stanley got him to make a half owl half baby to scare them Halloween kids. He made it pop out of a garbage can and it looked just like the real thing! That would probably work to scare that squirrel away since owls eat squirrels and babies can crawl around and get to small spaces in the ceiling. He can also do angels, grown-up Jesuses, and babies with Abraham Lincoln heads for jokes or whatever. I think the owl-baby would work best for the squirrel though.

 

[vraiblonde]

 

[Misfit]

He can also do angels, grown-up Jesuses, and babies with Abraham Lincoln heads for jokes or whatever. I think the owl-baby would work best for the squirrel though.

Can he make an owl Jesus? If he can, they could throw it up and down like when they throw cheerleaders at a football game.

The girls could scream "HE IS RISEN!!!" and the guys then scream "WHO!!!".

I bet that would scare the squirrel away.

 

[RoseRed]

Can he make an owl Jesus? If he can, they could throw it up and down like when they throw cheerleaders at a football game.

The girls could scream "HE IS RISEN!!!" and the guys then scream "WHO!!!".

I bet that would scare the squirrel away.