Hey Slik

[harleygirl]

Here is some jokes for you, sweetie


Men are like toilets -- either they're taken, or full of crap!

Q: What do you call a woman with no azzhole?
A: Divorced.

Why are men like diapers?
They are always on my ass and full of sh#t - thank goodness they're disposable!

 

[slik]

A group of girlfriends go on vacation and they see a five-story hotel with a sign that reads "For Women Only." Since they are without their boyfriends, they decide to go in.
The bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. "We have five floors. Go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide, since each floor has signs telling you what's inside."

So they start going up, and on the first floor the sign reads, "All the men here are horrible lovers, but they are sensitive and kind." The friends laugh and without hesitation, move on to the next floor.

The sign on the second floor reads, "All the men here are wonderful lovers, but they generally treat women badly." This wasn't going to do, so the friends move up to the third floor, where the sign reads, "All the men here are great lovers and sensitive to the needs of women."

This was good, but there were still two more floors.

On the fourth floor, the sign was perfect. "All the men here have perfect builds, are sensitive and attentive to women, are perfect lovers, and are single, rich and straight."

The women seem pleased but they decide that they would rather see what the fifth floor has to offer before they settle for the fourth.

When they reach the fifth floor, there is a sign that reads, "There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that it is impossible to please a woman."

 

[harleygirl]

A group of girlfriends go on vacation and they see a five-story hotel with a sign that reads "For Women Only." Since they are without their boyfriends, they decide to go in.
The bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. "We have five floors. Go up floor by floor, and once you find what you are looking for, you can stay there. It's easy to decide, since each floor has signs telling you what's inside."

So they start going up, and on the first floor the sign reads, "All the men here are horrible lovers, but they are sensitive and kind." The friends laugh and without hesitation, move on to the next floor.

The sign on the second floor reads, "All the men here are wonderful lovers, but they generally treat women badly." This wasn't going to do, so the friends move up to the third floor, where the sign reads, "All the men here are great lovers and sensitive to the needs of women."

This was good, but there were still two more floors.

On the fourth floor, the sign was perfect. "All the men here have perfect builds, are sensitive and attentive to women, are perfect lovers, and are single, rich and straight."

The women seem pleased but they decide that they would rather see what the fifth floor has to offer before they settle for the fourth.

When they reach the fifth floor, there is a sign that reads, "There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that it is impossible to please a woman."

Alright, that is funny. But not always true!!

 

[slik]

Slik: "Dear - what are you doing ?"

Harleygirl: "Just looking for something on our marriage contract, honey"

Slik: "What's that dear ?"

Harleygirl: "the expiration date!"

 

[harleygirl]

Slik: "Dear - what are you doing ?"

Harleygirl: "Just looking for something on our marriage contract, honey"

Slik: "What's that dear ?"

Harleygirl: "the expiration date!"

 

[arnert23]

Here is some jokes for you, sweetie


Men are like toilets -- either they're taken, or full of crap!

Q: What do you call a woman with no azzhole?
A: Divorced.

Why are men like diapers?
They are always on my ass and full of sh#t - thank goodness they're disposable!

What do you call a room full of women, half with PMS, half with yeast infections?
A whine and cheese party

Another:

Two guys and a girl were sitting at a bar talking about their lives.
The one guy said, "I'm a YUPPIE. You know, Young Urban Professional."
The second guy responded, "I'm a DINK. You know, Double Income No Kids."
They then asked the woman, "What are you?"
She replied: "I'm a WIFE. You know, Wash, Iron, F**k, Etc."

Also:

Q. Why do women have breasts?

A. So men will talk to them.

 

[slik]

When they reach the fifth floor, there is a sign that reads, "There are no men here. This floor was built only to prove that it is impossible to satisfy a woman."

Alright, that is funny. But not always true!!

True - pleasing a woman is not difficult given the correct circumstance, SATISFYING her is always a bit more difficult.