Holy Crap

[KDENISE977]

My little boxer gal got a stinkin squirrel yesterday !!

Those pesky squirrels will sit just beyond the cut off for my dogs underground fence and taunt them all day long and it drives them NUTS !! Well, payback it a biatch... she grabbed one last evening and hurled it up in the air and it sort of tucked and rolled and took off again. Should I be worried? Aren't squirrels terribly dirty and carry germs or disease? They have rabies up to date of course, but should I be worried about anything else?

Thank You !!

 

[Misfit]

My little boxer gal got a stinkin squirrel yesterday !!

Those pesky squirrels will sit just beyond the cut off for my dogs underground fence and taunt them all day long and it drives them NUTS !! Well, payback it a biatch... she grabbed one last evening and hurled it up in the air and it sort of tucked and rolled and took off again. Should I be worried? Aren't squirrels terribly dirty and carry germs or disease? They have rabies up to date of course, but should I be worried about anything else?

Thank You !!

KDENISE977,

Thank you for your concern; it has been a stressful time for me. I mean one minute I was happily jumping around gathering nuts for winter and the next I was being attacked by a psycho dog. I am a bit offended at the "Aren't squirrels terribly dirty and carry germs or disease" comment as this is a stereotype that my species has tried to stop, but rest assured, psycho dogs mouth smelled like kibble & poop so my hygiene is the least of her concerns. I have informed all of my friends to watch out for your beastie and we will try to avoid any further confrontation with it in the future.


V/r

Squirrel

 

[KDENISE977]

KDENISE977,

Thank you for your concern; it has been a stressful time for me. I mean one minute I was happily jumping around gathering nuts for winter and the next I was being attacked by a psycho dog. I am a bit offended at the "Aren't squirrels terribly dirty and carry germs or disease" comment as this is a stereotype that my species has tried to stop, but rest assured, psycho dogs mouth smelled like kibble & poop so my hygiene is the least of his concerns. I have informed all of my friends to watch out for your beastie and we will try to avoid any further confrontation with it in the future.


V/r

Squirrel

Dear Squirell,
You're too fat if my dog can catch you. You've been eating all the deer corn in the back yard, it's pizzing the deer off and it's made you soft. Get your fat azz to the gym or up a tree or risk the wrath of my pack of wild boxers.
Signed,
KDENISE

 

[Misfit]

Dear Squirell,
You're too fat if I can catch you. You've been eating all the deer corn in the back yard, it's pizzing the deer off and it's made you soft. Get your fat azz to the gym or risk the wrath of my pack of wild boxers.
Signed,
Molly the Mouth

Dog,

I will try not to take offence to your comments as, you being a flea bag wouldn’t understand “sexily fluffy”. Yes, I am beginning my winter weight; this is partly to do with Mr. Deer’s generous donations of deer corn but Mr. Deer, as I’m sure you know, is a dumb azz and will never miss the small amount I take so that I don’t die. If you would like to continue this line of accusations I will feel inclined to unleash my horde of squirrel friends to torment you as you drool looking at us from your owner’s window.

Squirrel

 

[nomoney]

Molly the Mouth,

I will try not to take offence to your comments as, you being a flea bag wouldn’t understand “sexily fluffy”. Yes, I am beginning my winter weight; this is partly to do with Mr. Deer’s generous donations of deer corn but Mr. Deer, as I’m sure you know, is a dumb azz and will never miss the small amount I take so that I don’t die. If you would like to continue this line of accusations I will feel inclined to unleash my horde of squirrel friends to torment you as you drool looking at us from your owner’s window.

Squirrel

Dear Squirrel and MY MOST FAVORITE PERSON !!!, *IM A GOOD GIRL I'M A GOOD GIRL*

I am so sorry that I have caused such a horrible *OH LOOK! IS THAT A LEAF OR A MONSTER???!!!! GOTTA GET IT, GOTTA GET IT....OH JUST A LEAF*... so terribly sorry about that where was I? Again, I apologize for the bad feelings you now both have between eachother. It was not my intention. I just saw you, squirrel....*SQUIRREL!!!! OMG THERE'S ANOTHER ONE. IM GOING TO EAT YOU AND ROLL ALL OVER YOUR DEAD BODY!!!!!!* oh my, I don't know what just came over me. I am ususally so loveable and get along with everyone. *OMG, I ITCH SO BAD ON MY ASS ALL OF A SUDDEN!! CANT GET IT, CANT GET IT, GETTING DIZZY! SO ITCHY!!" whew. that was close. Please accept my sincerest apologies for starting this. Can't we just all get along? *HOLY SH1T i SMELL BACON!!! BACON BACON BACON BACON BACON.....

lOVE,
the dog

 

[Misfit]

Dear Squirrel and MY MOST FAVORITE PERSON !!!, *IM A GOOD GIRL I'M A GOOD GIRL*

I am so sorry that I have caused such a horrible *OH LOOK! IS THAT A LEAF OR A MONSTER???!!!! GOTTA GET IT, GOTTA GET IT....OH JUST A LEAF*... so terribly sorry about that where was I? Again, I apologize for the bad feelings you now both have between eachother. It was not my intention. I just saw you, squirrel....*SQUIRREL!!!! OMG THERE'S ANOTHER ONE. IM GOING TO EAT YOU AND ROLL ALL OVER YOUR DEAD BODY!!!!!!* oh my, I don't know what just came over me. I am ususally so loveable and get along with everyone. *OMG, I ITCH SO BAD ON MY ASS ALL OF A SUDDEN!! CANT GET IT, CANT GET IT, GETTING DIZZY! SO ITCHY!!" whew. that was close. Please accept my sincerest apologies for starting this. Can't we just all get along? *HOLY SH1T i SMELL BACON!!! BACON BACON BACON BACON BACON.....

lOVE,
the dog

Dog,

Having watched your antics for quite some time, I have come to the conclusion that you and Mr. Deer should become friends. You both seem to share similar...well how do I say, characteristics. Perhaps we can come to some sort of yard "time share". I would be willing to mediate between you and Mr. Squirrel if you would like.

Respectfully,



Mrs. Bird

 

[KDENISE977]

Dear Squirrel and MY MOST FAVORITE PERSON !!!, *IM A GOOD GIRL I'M A GOOD GIRL* I am so sorry that I have caused such a horrible *OH LOOK! IS THAT A LEAF OR A MONSTER???!!!! GOTTA GET IT, GOTTA GET IT....OH JUST A LEAF*... so terribly sorry about that where was I? Again, I apologize for the bad feelings you now both have between eachother. It was not my intention. I just saw you, squirrel....*SQUIRREL!!!! OMG THERE'S ANOTHER ONE. IM GOING TO EAT YOU AND ROLL ALL OVER YOUR DEAD BODY!!!!!!* oh my, I don't know what just came over me. I am ususally so loveable and get along with everyone. *OMG, I ITCH SO BAD ON MY ASS ALL OF A SUDDEN!! CANT GET IT, CANT GET IT, GETTING DIZZY! SO ITCHY!!" whew. that was close. Please accept my sincerest apologies for starting this. Can't we just all get along? *HOLY SH1T i SMELL BACON!!! BACON BACON BACON BACON BACON..... lOVE, the dog

Get out of my head. It's too crowded

 

[SoMDGirl42]

Get out of my head. It's too crowded

Hey bitch! Damn girl, you looking good. Wanna get together and hook up? I'm a 3 year old very good looking dude. I have beatiful brown eyes, and a lovely coat. In the sunlight, I almost look like I have tiger strips. I love to play Walks? No way, I'm all about chasing those squirrels with ya girl! Deer? We'll chase them too. Birds, not picky I'll go for them as well. Just think of all the trouble we could get into together. Are you on birth control before this gets any more serious, because I'm packing heat.

Love Tater

 

[KDENISE977]

Hey bitch! Damn girl, you looking good. Wanna get together and hook up? I'm a 3 year old very good looking dude. I have beatiful brown eyes, and a lovely coat. In the sunlight, I almost look like I have tiger strips. I love to play Walks? No way, I'm all about chasing those squirrels with ya girl! Deer? We'll chase them too. Birds, not picky I'll go for them as well. Just think of all the trouble we could get into together. Are you on birth control before this gets any more serious, because I'm packing heat. Love Tater

What you say we get's to know each other better?
That sounds good but I don't think that I can let ya
I don't know, tell me is it so
Do you get a kick, out of tellin' brothers no?

No it's not that see you don't understand
How should I put it, I got a man!!!

 

[Independence]

 

[Caution]

My little boxer gal got a stinkin squirrel yesterday !!

Those pesky squirrels will sit just beyond the cut off for my dogs underground fence and taunt them all day long and it drives them NUTS !! Well, payback it a biatch... she grabbed one last evening and hurled it up in the air and it sort of tucked and rolled and took off again. Should I be worried? Aren't squirrels terribly dirty and carry germs or disease? They have rabies up to date of course, but should I be worried about anything else?

Thank You !!

Oh It's on now!!!