Holy ####!
- Thread starter Kyle
- Start date
Dakota
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I have been laughing at this for 5 minutes. Confession: decades ago, my office got fricken evicted and we ended up in a storage garage for nearly a year. We were packed in there like sardines in a tin can. My partner at the time farted and another lady who worked by us, a few feet away, was getting ready to leave with her granddaughter who just got dropped off. She pauses for a moment, smells the air and asked her granddaughter "did you poo in your pants." Her granddaughter shakes her head no. I am trying not to bust out laughing so I ducked under my desk and ended up tooting myself. I hear her saying to her granddaughter when she got even more of a whiff, "let go to the bathroom." Soon as she was out of sight, my partner and I laughed hysterically and we swore to secrecy because we were both guilty.
GregV814
Well-Known Member
when our son was about 8 or 9, we took him to KIngs Dominion. It was a great day. He bought a whoopie cushion which we enjoyed, but not Moms disgust at her "boys"...
As we were leaving, he tucked it up in his armpit and "tooted" others... About 1/2 way to the car, a Grandma and her two grandsons walked by and he let the toot rip.....Grandmas voice still echos in my ears (I told you to use the bathroom!!!) as her grandsons pleaded innocence..... He laughed all the way home..
As we were leaving, he tucked it up in his armpit and "tooted" others... About 1/2 way to the car, a Grandma and her two grandsons walked by and he let the toot rip.....Grandmas voice still echos in my ears (I told you to use the bathroom!!!) as her grandsons pleaded innocence..... He laughed all the way home..
I recently recounted this incident for the victim..and good friend and former field engineer traveling buddy, who has been in the hospital with some serious health issues. He begged me to stop telling stories...something about it hurting to l;augh.
So there we were...two lonely field engineers, standing next to each other in a tiny and near-deserted airport terminal in remote Sandane, Norway. It was o-dark-thirty, and we're waiting for our little plane to arrive. Having imbibed significant quantities of the rich Norwegian pilsner the evening before, my constitution was a bit....unsettled. At some point, the pressure inside my person decided it needed to equalize with the atmospheric pressure. The result was a noxious gas emission of sufficient volume to refloat the Hindenburg. It is at that point that I slowly edge away from Bobby, trying to get some social distancing action going. I look back in his direction and he's looking at me with a curious "wtf you doin'?" expression on his face. That look is immediately erased by one that is a combination of horror and pure disgust and he's waving his arms around like he's fending off angry bees, and desperately trying to move around and find some clean, breathable air. Oh..and he was calling me terrible names too.
Henceforth and forever more, he and I refer to that as the "Sandane Incident".
So there we were...two lonely field engineers, standing next to each other in a tiny and near-deserted airport terminal in remote Sandane, Norway. It was o-dark-thirty, and we're waiting for our little plane to arrive. Having imbibed significant quantities of the rich Norwegian pilsner the evening before, my constitution was a bit....unsettled. At some point, the pressure inside my person decided it needed to equalize with the atmospheric pressure. The result was a noxious gas emission of sufficient volume to refloat the Hindenburg. It is at that point that I slowly edge away from Bobby, trying to get some social distancing action going. I look back in his direction and he's looking at me with a curious "wtf you doin'?" expression on his face. That look is immediately erased by one that is a combination of horror and pure disgust and he's waving his arms around like he's fending off angry bees, and desperately trying to move around and find some clean, breathable air. Oh..and he was calling me terrible names too.
Henceforth and forever more, he and I refer to that as the "Sandane Incident".
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Young nephew passed a little gas in Cracker Barrel and mom asked him if he had an accident. He said no I pharted. The third time she smelled one she told him I know you had an accident. He stood up dropped trou bent over spread his cheeks and said loudly "see, I told you it was only pharts!"
GopherM
Darwin was right
I like the tale of the mother that walked in on her little boy that was all upset. She asked him what was wrong. He told her that his fart fell on the floor.