How do you tell if a lawyer is lying?

[Sharon]

HEMPSTEAD, N.Y. -- Two men have been arrested for trading lawyer jokes while waiting on line to get into First District Court in Hempstead.

While waiting on a long line to get through into court, they began telling each other lawyer jokes such as, "How do you tell if a lawyer is lying? Answer: his lips are moving."

Well, an attorney within earshot got angry and told court officers that the two men were disturbing the public.

They were handcuffed and charged with disorderly conduct.

In other news... morons, rednecks, and blondes want in on the action.

 

[ylexot]

I'd like to beat the crap out of that lawyer.

Q: What do you call a million lawyers at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start.

 

[vraiblonde]

And then lawyers can't figure out why people tell lawyer jokes!

 

[Toxick]

Q: What's the difference between a dead lawyer in the road and a dead skunk in the road?

A: The skunk has skid marks in front of it.

 

[SamSpade]

Q: What's the difference between a dead lawyer in the road and a dead skunk in the road?

A: The skunk has skid marks in front of it.

I love lawyer jokes!

Q: How many lawyers does it take to grease a combine?
A: Only one if you run him through REAL slowly

Q: How do you get a lawyer out of a tree?
A: Cut the rope

Q: You're on an island with bin Laden, a hungry lion and a lawyer, and your gun has just two bullets. What do you do?
A: Shoot the lawyer twice (just to be *sure*)

Q: How do you stop a lawyer from drowning?
A: Shoot him before he hits the water

Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of pond scum?
A: The bucket

 

[Lenny]

Q: What do you call it when a 60-seat bus goes over the cliff with 59 lawyers on board?

A: A wasted seat.

 

[mainman]

How do you tell if a lawyer is lying?

His lips are moving?