How my father gave me a terrifying lesson at 10


Ubi bene ibi patria

"At the age of 10, Bernard Hare's father took him down the mine where he worked. It was an experience he would never forget.

Sometimes, even now, I wake up with my head throbbing and my ears ringing, as if my skull has been tightly clamped in a vice all night.

I haven't been to the doctor's about it. It wouldn't do any good. It isn't depression, or stress. It isn't a migraine, or a hangover. It's nothing physical at all. It's just a memory - a memory from childhood.

One Sunday morning when I was 10, my dad woke me up by tweaking my nose: "Come on, son. Gerrup! Ah've a surprise for thi!"

Oh no, I thought. My dad was full of surprises - it was the one thing I didn't like about him - and he always sprang them on you when you weren't expecting them.

His worst surprise wasn't even a surprise at all. You knew exactly what was coming. He normally struck when he was drunk. He would stumble through the front door, smash one of mum's favourite ornaments, trip over the dog, give you the beady eye, and shout, "Whiskers!" ".....


Well-Known Member
PREMO Member
Who was your father, boy? A Commodore 64? Your mama a pong TV hookup?