How old is Grandma?

jazz lady

~*~ Rara Avis ~*~
PREMO Member
One evening a grandson was talking to his grandmother about current events. The grandson asked his grandmother what she thought about the shootings at schools, the computer age, and just things in general.

The Grandma replied, "Well, let me think a minute, I was born, before television, penicillin, polio shots, frozen foods, Xerox, contact lenses, Frisbees and the pill. There was no radar, credit cards, laser beams or ball-point pens.

Man had not invented pantyhose, air conditioners, dishwashers, clothes dryers, and the clothes were hung out to dry in the fresh air and man hadn't yet walked on the moon.

Your Grandfather and I got married first-and then lived together. Every family had a father and a mother. Until I was 25, I called every man older than I, 'Sir'- and after I turned 25, I still called policemen and every man with a title, "Sir.' We were before gay-rights, computer-dating, dual careers, daycare centers, and group therapy. Our lives were governed by the Ten Commandments, good judgment, and common sense.

We were taught to know the difference between right and wrong and to stand up and take responsibility for our actions Serving your country was a privilege; living in this country was a bigger privilege. We thought fast food was what people ate during Lent.

Having a meaningful relationship meant getting along with your cousins. Draft dodgers were people who closed their front doors when the evening breeze started. Time-sharing meant time the family spent together in the evenings and weekends - not purchasing condominiums.

We never heard of FM radios, tape decks, CDs, electric typewriters, yogurt, or guys wearing earrings. We listened to the Big Bands, Jack Benny, and the President's speeches on our radios. And I don't ever remember any kid blowing his brains out listening to Tommy Dorsey.

If you saw anything with 'Made in Japan' on it, it was junk. The term 'making out' referred to how you did on your school exam. Pizza Hut, McDonald's, and instant coffee were unheard of. We had 5 & 10-cent stores where you could actually buy things for 5 and 10 cents.

Ice-cream cones, phone calls, rides on a streetcar, and a Pepsi were all a nickel. And if you didn't want to splurge, you could spend your nickel on enough stamps to mail 1 letter and 2 postcards.

You could buy a new Chevy Coupe for $600 but who could afford one? Too bad, because gas was 11 cents a gallon.

In my day, "grass" was mowed, "coke" was a cold drink, "pot" was something your mother cooked in, and "rock music" was your grandmother's lullaby. "Aids" were helpers in the Principal's office, "chip" meant a piece of wood, "hardware" was found in a hardware store, and "software" wasn't even a word.

And we were the last generation to actually believe that a lady needed a husband to have a baby. No wonder people call us "old and confused" and say there is a generation gap.....

and how old do you think I am ???.....

Read on to see -- pretty scary if you think about it and pretty sad at the same time.

***********************************************

This Woman would be only 58 years old!
 

jazz lady

~*~ Rara Avis ~*~
PREMO Member
Sorry - I didn't personally go in and verify EVERY SINGLE thing in the post (it IS in the JOKES section) - so sue me. :razz:
 

Ken King

A little rusty but not crusty
PREMO Member
Originally posted by jazz lady
Sorry - I didn't personally go in and verify EVERY SINGLE thing in the post (it IS in the JOKES section) - so sue me. :razz:

Look, I said I liked it. Did you just skip over that portion. Even if it was just a joke you should at least make it accurate, it was simple enough to do.
 

jazz lady

~*~ Rara Avis ~*~
PREMO Member
How about if I...

Originally posted by Ken King


Look, I said I liked it. Did you just skip over that portion. Even if it was just a joke you should at least make it accurate, it was simple enough to do.

...send everything to you for verification before I post, hmm?? :lol: (And I did get the part about you liked it - thank you - I'm honored. :notworthy )
 

Ken King

A little rusty but not crusty
PREMO Member
Re: How about if I...

Originally posted by jazz lady


...send everything to you for verification before I post, hmm?? :lol: (And I did get the part about you liked it - thank you - I'm honored. :notworthy )

Why not just check it out for yourself or are you just stupid or something?
 

Ken King

A little rusty but not crusty
PREMO Member
Re: Re: Re: How about if I...

Originally posted by BchBns


I smell a pissing match coming on? But I believe you both have staying power and won't jump ship, too, right? :(

Check our freaking birth dates and that ought to tell you something.
 

jazz lady

~*~ Rara Avis ~*~
PREMO Member
Re: Re: How about if I...

Originally posted by Ken King


Why not just check it out for yourself or are you just stupid or something?

Is THAT the best you can do??? :lol: Come on, bud - I expected better from you - a fellow Scorpio - the SAME birthday even - you disappointed me. :(
 

jazz lady

~*~ Rara Avis ~*~
PREMO Member
Re: Re: Re: How about if I...

Originally posted by BchBns


I smell a pissing match coming on? But I believe you both have staying power and won't jump ship, too, right? :(

Too tired for a pissing match today - can I tag you in for me, Bch??? :lol:
 

cattitude

My Sweetest Boy
jazz and bch

Oh goody!! That old he said/she said stuff was getting old!! I'll be hanging out waiting for the fur to fly:lmao: :lmao:
 

jazz lady

~*~ Rara Avis ~*~
PREMO Member
Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: How about if I...

Originally posted by BchBns


sorry, but I bagged my catch yesterday when JRogers dearly departed us for fear we would hurt her oh-so-innocent daycare mommy image among her potential charges!

Perhaps you can ask VRAI to step in ... she's been biting her tongue the last 24 hours ... I think she's ready to lash out!;)

Ok, Vrai - TAG, YOU'RE IT!!! :D
 

Ken King

A little rusty but not crusty
PREMO Member
Re: Re: Re: How about if I...

Originally posted by jazz lady


Is THAT the best you can do??? :lol: Come on, bud - I expected better from you - a fellow Scorpio - the SAME birthday even - you disappointed me. :(

Not even close to the best that I can do, but then from what I have read of your posts you aren't really deserving of anyone's best. :biteme:
 

Kyle

Beloved Misanthrope
PREMO Member
Re: Re: Re: Re: How about if I...

Originally posted by Ken King


Check our freaking birth dates and that ought to tell you something.
A kind of "Donovan's Reef" type thing?

If so... You have to wait till November!!! :lol:
 

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
Oh rats! I get tagged in and show up late to the party! Okay...let me get my thoughts together...*ahem*

Ken King, you nefarious rapscallion! (hmmm...wait...let me think...)

Okay. *ahem* Where do you get off calling ANYONE stupid after that idiocy you've been posting in the Palestinian thread!?! Please! You act like YOU'VE never seen a TV...or a newspaper...or a history book! If you can't take a simple little joke for what it is without picking it to anal-retentive pieces, then you better just trot your happy rump right back to the Politics Forum with the rest of the no-sense-of-humor weiners! (Oh wait...that's me too...hmmm) Wouldn't want to accidentally make you LAUGH or anything!

How's that?

(But, Jazz - I don't know if I'd be tossing around comments like "so sue me" to our resident law student! If ya know what I mean!)
 

Ken King

A little rusty but not crusty
PREMO Member
Originally posted by vraiblonde

Ken King, you nefarious rapscallion! (hmmm...wait...let me think...)

Okay. *ahem* Where do you get off calling ANYONE stupid after that idiocy you've been posting in the Palestinian thread!?! Please! You act like YOU'VE never seen a TV...or a newspaper...or a history book!


Idiocy? Please show me where I have posted something that wasn't factual. That is if you can. Just because I don't buy into the crap that you do doesn't mean you are any more correct than I am.

If you can't take a simple little joke for what it is without picking it to anal-retentive pieces, then you better just trot your happy rump right back to the Politics Forum with the rest of the no-sense-of-humor weiners!

What picking it apart? I make an observation that indicates Grandma should be older then what was posted and I am picking it apart. You sure are sounding a lot like James Carville nowadays. I guess I should have reailized (and accepted) that since it was a joke about a woman's age there would be some lying going on.
 

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
Ken, get with the times - women don't lie about their age anymore. NOW told us to quit doing it.

If I sound like James Carville, YOU sound like Yasser Arafat! :razz:

And I am ALWAYS more correct than you are! :moon:
 

Ken King

A little rusty but not crusty
PREMO Member
Originally posted by vraiblonde
And I am ALWAYS more correct than you are!

Maybe in your mind and that is one really small place that I don't worry about. :biteme:
 

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
No, YOU :biteme: :lmao:

(Sorry - not up to snuff today. I'll have to take this back up when I'm more coherent - which leaves you a gaping opening for comment)
 
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