Railroad
Routinely Derailed
John Q. Public, Icon of American Democracy, has passed away in his sleep in his New York City townhouse. He was 160 at the time of death. Doctors report he died of natural causes. In many respects, Mr. Public can be seen as the most influential citizen in recent history. He has been the imagined Man On The Street, known to most Americans and many foreigners alike. His supposed opinions on political issues and his special status in the Madison Avenue mind earned him many, many special perks and honors - everything from services to products developed purportedly to serve his best interests.
John is survived by his son, The Body Public, and his daughter and his son-in-law, Jane and John Doe, the ubiquitous icons of modern generic identification.
Formal public services are not planned. There will be a quiet family service, attended by Mr. Public's nieces and nephews (The Subject, The Decedent, The Suspect, The Plaintiff, The Accused, The Victim, The Defendant, The Deceased, The Body, The Student, and The Patient). Mr. Public will be cremated, and per his request, his ashes will be scattered throughout the Dead Letter Office.
John is survived by his son, The Body Public, and his daughter and his son-in-law, Jane and John Doe, the ubiquitous icons of modern generic identification.
Formal public services are not planned. There will be a quiet family service, attended by Mr. Public's nieces and nephews (The Subject, The Decedent, The Suspect, The Plaintiff, The Accused, The Victim, The Defendant, The Deceased, The Body, The Student, and The Patient). Mr. Public will be cremated, and per his request, his ashes will be scattered throughout the Dead Letter Office.