J
justhangn
Guest
Q: What should Iraq get for its air defense system?
A: A refund!
SADDAM HUSSEIN' S TOP TEN SUMMER FUN TIPS
=========================================
10. Never store fireworks too close to your hidden cache
of chemical weapons.
9. Ladies, turn heads at the beach with a skimpy two-piece
veil.
8. When it comes to hot dogs, mustard bad, mustard gas good.
7. Your beret makes a great spur-of-the-moment frisbee.
6. When barbecuing, wear hilarious apron that reads: "Kiss
the chef or you will be put to death."
5. Thursdays are always half-price at "Wacky Saddam's Family
Water Park."
4. Enjoy the cooling breeze from your soldiers waving their
flags of surrender.
3. Wet mustache contest!
2. Mix one part iced tea with one part lemonade, pour into
large punch bowl, and use to drown your enemies.
1. Two words: camouflage speedo.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Iraqi TV Guide
SUNDAY
8:00 - My 33 Sons
8:30 - Saddam Knows Best
9:00 - I Dream of Mohammed
9:30 - Let's Mecca Deal
10:00 - The Kabul Hillbillies
MONDAY
8:00 - Husseinfeld
9:00 - Mad About Everything
9:30 - Monday Night Stoning
10:00 - Win Saddam's Money
10:30 - Allah McBeal
TUESDAY
8:00 - Wheel of Terror
8:30 - The Price is Right if Saddam Says it's Right
9:00 - Children are Forbidden from Saying the Darndest Things
9:30 - Saddam's Wackiest Public Execution Bloopers
10:00 - Buffy the Yankee Imperialist Dog Slayer
WEDNESDAY
8:00 - Beat the Press
8:30 - When Kurds Attack
9:00 - Two Guys, a Girl, and Pita Bread
9:30 - Just Shoot Everyone
10:00 - Veilwatch
THURSDAY
8:00 - Fatima Loves Chachi
8:30 - M*U*S*T*A*S*H
9:00 - Veronica's Closet Full of Long, Black, Shapeless
Dresses and Veils
9:30 - Married with 139 Children
10:00 - Eye for an Eye Witness News
FRIDAY
8:00 - Judge Saddam
8:30 - Suddenly Sanctions
9:00 - Who Wants to Marry a Terrorist Millionaire?
9:30 - Cave and Garden Television
10:00 - No-Witness News
SATURDAY
8:00 - Spongebob Squareturban
8:30 - Who's Koran Is It Anyway?
9:00 - Teletalibans
9:30 - Camel 54, Where Are You?
A: A refund!
SADDAM HUSSEIN' S TOP TEN SUMMER FUN TIPS
=========================================
10. Never store fireworks too close to your hidden cache
of chemical weapons.
9. Ladies, turn heads at the beach with a skimpy two-piece
veil.
8. When it comes to hot dogs, mustard bad, mustard gas good.
7. Your beret makes a great spur-of-the-moment frisbee.
6. When barbecuing, wear hilarious apron that reads: "Kiss
the chef or you will be put to death."
5. Thursdays are always half-price at "Wacky Saddam's Family
Water Park."
4. Enjoy the cooling breeze from your soldiers waving their
flags of surrender.
3. Wet mustache contest!
2. Mix one part iced tea with one part lemonade, pour into
large punch bowl, and use to drown your enemies.
1. Two words: camouflage speedo.
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
Iraqi TV Guide
SUNDAY
8:00 - My 33 Sons
8:30 - Saddam Knows Best
9:00 - I Dream of Mohammed
9:30 - Let's Mecca Deal
10:00 - The Kabul Hillbillies
MONDAY
8:00 - Husseinfeld
9:00 - Mad About Everything
9:30 - Monday Night Stoning
10:00 - Win Saddam's Money
10:30 - Allah McBeal
TUESDAY
8:00 - Wheel of Terror
8:30 - The Price is Right if Saddam Says it's Right
9:00 - Children are Forbidden from Saying the Darndest Things
9:30 - Saddam's Wackiest Public Execution Bloopers
10:00 - Buffy the Yankee Imperialist Dog Slayer
WEDNESDAY
8:00 - Beat the Press
8:30 - When Kurds Attack
9:00 - Two Guys, a Girl, and Pita Bread
9:30 - Just Shoot Everyone
10:00 - Veilwatch
THURSDAY
8:00 - Fatima Loves Chachi
8:30 - M*U*S*T*A*S*H
9:00 - Veronica's Closet Full of Long, Black, Shapeless
Dresses and Veils
9:30 - Married with 139 Children
10:00 - Eye for an Eye Witness News
FRIDAY
8:00 - Judge Saddam
8:30 - Suddenly Sanctions
9:00 - Who Wants to Marry a Terrorist Millionaire?
9:30 - Cave and Garden Television
10:00 - No-Witness News
SATURDAY
8:00 - Spongebob Squareturban
8:30 - Who's Koran Is It Anyway?
9:00 - Teletalibans
9:30 - Camel 54, Where Are You?