Late for work

While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 15mph over the limit), I noticed a cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge. Naturally, he pulled me over walked up to the car and asked me, what the hurry is?''

I replied I'm late for work.

"Oh yeah," said the cop. "What do you do?"

"I'm a rectum stretcher," I responded.

The cop said, "What?.... A rectum stretcher? What does a rectum stretcher DO ?"

I said, "Well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand. Then I work until I can get both hands in there, and then I slowly stretch it until it's about 6 foot wide."

The cop asked me, "What the hell do you do with a 6 foot azzhole?"

I simply replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge...

Bail: $100
Ticket: $95
Look on that cop's face: PRICELESS
 
G

Gemmi

Guest
While I was flying down the road yesterday (only 15mph over the limit), I noticed a cop with a radar gun sitting on top of a bridge. Naturally, he pulled me over walked up to the car and asked me, what the hurry is?''

I replied I'm late for work.

"Oh yeah," said the cop. "What do you do?"

"I'm a rectum stretcher," I responded.

The cop said, "What?.... A rectum stretcher? What does a rectum stretcher DO ?"

I said, "Well, I start with one finger, then I work my way up to two fingers, then three, then four, then my whole hand. Then I work until I can get both hands in there, and then I slowly stretch it until it's about 6 foot wide."

The cop asked me, "What the hell do you do with a 6 foot azzhole?"

I simply replied, "You give him a radar gun and park him on top of a bridge...

Bail: $100
Ticket: $95
Look on that cop's face: PRICELESS

:lmao::lmao:
 
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