devilvice
Angel
A guy walked into a bar with his pet monkey and ordered a drink.
> While he was drinking, the monkey jumped all around the place.
> It grabbed some olives off the bar and ate them, then grabbed some sliced
> limes and ate them.
> It jumped onto the pool table, took one of the billiard balls, stuck it in
> his mouth, and to everyone's amazement, somehow swallowed it whole.
>
> The bartender screamed at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just
> did?"
>
> The guy said, "No, what?"
>
> "He just ate a billiard ball off my pool table... whole!"
>
> "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "he eats everything in
> sight. Sorry, I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finished his drink,
> paid his bar bill and paid for the stuff the monkey ate and walked out.
>
> Two weeks later he came into the bar again along with his monkey.
>
> He ordered a drink and the monkey started running around the bar as
> before. While the man was finishing his drink, the monkey found a
> maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabbed it, stuck it up his butt, then
> pulled it out and ate it. Then it found a peanut.. This, too, he stuck up
> his butt, pulled it out and ate it.
>
> The bartender was disgusted "Did you see what your monkey did now?" he
> asked.
>
> "No, what?" replied the guy.
>
> "Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, pulled it out and ate it.
> The same with a peanut!"
>
> "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me." said the guy.
>
> "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he had to pass that cue
> ball, he measures everything first
> While he was drinking, the monkey jumped all around the place.
> It grabbed some olives off the bar and ate them, then grabbed some sliced
> limes and ate them.
> It jumped onto the pool table, took one of the billiard balls, stuck it in
> his mouth, and to everyone's amazement, somehow swallowed it whole.
>
> The bartender screamed at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just
> did?"
>
> The guy said, "No, what?"
>
> "He just ate a billiard ball off my pool table... whole!"
>
> "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replied the guy, "he eats everything in
> sight. Sorry, I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finished his drink,
> paid his bar bill and paid for the stuff the monkey ate and walked out.
>
> Two weeks later he came into the bar again along with his monkey.
>
> He ordered a drink and the monkey started running around the bar as
> before. While the man was finishing his drink, the monkey found a
> maraschino cherry on the bar. He grabbed it, stuck it up his butt, then
> pulled it out and ate it. Then it found a peanut.. This, too, he stuck up
> his butt, pulled it out and ate it.
>
> The bartender was disgusted "Did you see what your monkey did now?" he
> asked.
>
> "No, what?" replied the guy.
>
> "Well, he stuck a maraschino cherry up his butt, pulled it out and ate it.
> The same with a peanut!"
>
> "Yeah, that doesn't surprise me." said the guy.
>
> "He still eats everything in sight, but ever since he had to pass that cue
> ball, he measures everything first
