Navy Joke

Mr Speedo

Mr Speedo

New Member
Technology advancements in the Navy

A very confident Navy Chief walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman. He gives her a quick glance then casually looks at his watch for a moment.

The woman notices this and asks, "Is your date running late?"
"No," he replies, "I just got this state-of-the-art watch, and I as just testing it."

The intrigued woman says, "A state-of-the-art watch? What's so special about it?"

The Chief explains, "It uses alpha waves to talk to me telepathically.

The lady says, "What's it telling you now?"

"Well, it says you're not wearing any panties....

The woman giggles and replies, "Well it must be broken because I am wearing panties!"

The Chief smirks, taps his watch and says, "Damn thing's an hour fast."
 
Mr Speedo

Mr Speedo

New Member
Not to get on chiefs, but...

"The Genie"

A Petty Officer Second Class, First Class and a Chief are off the ship together for lunch. While crossing a park they come upon an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out in a puff of smoke. The Genie says, "I usually only grant three wishes, so I'll give each of you just one." "Me first!" says the Petty Officer Second Class. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, a beautiful woman at my side and not a care in the world." Poof! He's gone. "Me next!" says the First Class. "I want to be in
Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of pina coladas and a beautiful woman." Poof! He's gone. "You're next," the Genie says to the Chief.

The Chief says, "I want those two back on the ship right after lunch."
 
RangerJohn

RangerJohn

New Member
In the same vein.....

What are the four scariest sayings in the world?

A Captain saying "We need to work smarter and not harder."
A Lieutenant saying "I think...."
An ENSIGN saying "Based upon my experience..."
A CHIEF, chuckling while saying "watch this ####!"
 
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