One Liners

[HollowSoul]

you know.....legs is the word, s lets go back to my place and spread the word

 

[Kain99]

All those who believe in psycho kinesis raise my hand.

 

[nomoney]

So you wanna get laid huh???



well then crawl up a chickens a$$ and wait.

 

[vraiblonde]

You guys are really being no help. Funny, but no help.

 

[kwillia]

I have it on good source Dustin hit the ball out of the park with...

"Nice legs, what time do they open?"

 

[unixpirate]

You guys are really being no help. Funny, but no help.

 

[justhangn]

Take my advice; I don't use it anyway.

A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer.

If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is not for you!

He who smiles in a crisis has found someone to blame.

Anything not nailed down is a cat toy.

I saw Elvis. He sat between me and Bigfoot on the UFO.

Next time you wave, use all your fingers.

The only perfect science is hindsight.

He does the work of three men: Larry, Moe and Curly.

A procrastinator's work is never done.

My favorite mythical creature? The honest politician.

Leftists are among the first to speak of their rights.

A penny saved is a Congressional spending oversight.

I like kids, but I don't think I could eat a whole one.

AIBOHPHOBIA - the fear of palindromes.

If puns were outlawed, only outlaws would have puns.

I was the next door kid's imaginary friend.

If you believe in telekinesis, raise my hand.

Despite the high cost of living, it remains popular.

I'm an apathetic sociopath - I'd kill you if I cared.

Do radioactive cats have 18 half-lives?

Even crime wouldn't pay if the government ran it.

 

[Kain99]

Originally posted by vraiblonde
You guys are really being no help. Funny, but no help.

I helped! (see above)

Never raise your hands to your kids...it leaves your groin unprotected.

 

[Tonio]

Originally posted by Kain99
All those who believe in psycho kinesis raise my hand.

Is this too graphic?

"It doesn't matter if you turn me down, because I can use psychokinesis to stimulate you sexually."

 

[Kain99]

Capital punishment turns the state into a murderer. But imprisonment turns the state into a gay dungeon-master. -- Rev. Jesse Jackson

 

[Kyle]

Originally posted by nomoney
I've lost my puppy, can you help me look for him? I'm pretty sure he wandered into that motel room across the street.

You forgot to mention the slurpy.

 

[kwillia]

Originally posted by Kyle
You forgot to mention the slurpy.

Kyle, quick... post one of your un-inspirational posters.... nomo, is about to make me fro up after reading the other tread...

 

[nomoney]

Originally posted by kwillia
Kyle, quick... post one of your un-inspirational posters.... nomo, is about to make me fro up after reading the other tread...

Hey;I have a serious more mysterious side.

but just so you can put away the barf bag:



Damn girl, you have more curves than a race track.

I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.

I'm bigger and better than the Titanic ... only 200 woman went down on the Titanic

If I flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances are of getting head?

 

[designerxboi]

Originally posted by nomoney
Don't worry about the missing teeth, it just means that there is more room

 

[Tonio]

"Would you help settle an argument between me and my buddy? He says that your breasts are fake, while I say they are real. I offered to ask you whether they were, but he says your word isn't good enough and that I have to feel them to make sure..."

 

[Tonio]

Just do this...

 

[Tonio]

"One night with you and I'll be singing, 'Thanks for the Mammaries!' "

 

[Chasey_Lane]

Originally posted by nomoney

I've just moved you to the top of my 'to do' list.

I'm bigger and better than the Titanic ... only 200 woman went down on the Titanic

If I flip a coin, what do you reckon my chances are of getting head?

Great!

 

[FancyBelle]

If I'm not in bed by 10:00 I go on home. What time is it?