Putting the Somd Forums on your resume

[Tonio]

http://www.worth1000.com/cache/gallery/contestcache.asp?contest_id=5141&display=text

Dear Sir or Madam,

I would like to be considered for the possition of Text Juror on you’re estimable website. I am a long-standing reader (since the age of nine!), and I do belief my spelling and grammer to be impeccible. As a juror, I believe my fair and non-judgemental system of grading entrys will be a boon to your site. I have seen that you do have a voting guideline already, but I will work with you to improve that.

As you will see from my resume, I have won a number of awards for my writing (D+, D, and D-), all from your own website! I have also honed my skills (my l33t skillz!) as a critic by using internet message boards! Here I have learned many 'cool' phrases I can use when critiquing text contest entrys, such as 'U=suxor' and 'tHat suxxxx!!!! '.

I will prove to you my Worth (as you see I know the 'in' jokes and so will be a 'hit' with your members) - here is the voting scheme I have been using!

10 - Things that make you say WOOT! Only storys as good as Michael Crichton’s get a 10.
9 - Nearly perfect. Or really, really funny! Or has rogue dinosaurs in it.
8 - A great story. Funny, exciting or moving - but not too 'creative' for me to understand.
7 - Very good.
6 - Very good (not a seven, though).
5 - Good. The story has perhaps some spelling and/or gramatical errors or is also confusing me too at the same time.
4 - Not good (and/or bad).
3 - I don’t give threes because I don’t want to discourage the writer.
2 - I don’t give twos because I don’t want to discourage the writer.
1 - I only give ones to the other entries for competitions I’m in

As you can see I can be cool and clever! And I promise I will not be patronizing to you’re 'less literate' entrants (no matter how dumb they are!).

I know you will see sence! I look forward to you working with me.

Your's faithfully,
Hidden Author.

This one is good, too.

I feel that the experiences I have gained in my previous line of work make me an ideal candidate. Although the products I have been accustomed to selling in the past are technically illegal, it’s my belief that the principals are the same...I was sole proprietor of a small, but successful narcotics sales company for five years...