Railroad
Routinely Derailed
"It certainly has all the characteristics of the type of steak we see served in Japanese Steakhouses, " remarked Dr. Robert Dissection, team leader at the Insects lab of the Department of Health and Human Services. "We estimated this little fellow ate at least twice his own body weight before succumbing to the effects of Teriyaki poisoning."
It's a problem; each year, untold numbers of maggots might be dying from the chemicals found in commercially-produced condiments.
"We will take this all the way to Congress," said Ms. Acrid N. Fetid, president of MARO (Maggots Against Restaurant Owners). "These maggots have beneficial value, or else why would they be here? We want nothing short of a complete shutdown of the condiments industry until this has been fully investigated!"
"This is something your average rabid right-wing conservative Republican never told you about," said Senator Ted Kennedy, with John Kerry at his side vigorously nodding his head in agreement. "They back industry and special interest groups, not maggots like us!"
It's a problem; each year, untold numbers of maggots might be dying from the chemicals found in commercially-produced condiments.
"We will take this all the way to Congress," said Ms. Acrid N. Fetid, president of MARO (Maggots Against Restaurant Owners). "These maggots have beneficial value, or else why would they be here? We want nothing short of a complete shutdown of the condiments industry until this has been fully investigated!"
"This is something your average rabid right-wing conservative Republican never told you about," said Senator Ted Kennedy, with John Kerry at his side vigorously nodding his head in agreement. "They back industry and special interest groups, not maggots like us!"
