The Rabbi

mudpuddle

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The Rabbi


This is a story about a popular young Rabbi, who on Sabbath eve, announces to his congregation that he will not renew his contract. He explains that he must move on to a larger congregation that will pay him more.

There is a hush. No one wants him to leave.

Sol Epstein, who owns several new car dealerships, stands up and proclaims, "If the Rabbi stays, I will provide him with a new Cadillac every year and his wife with a Honda mini-van to transport their children!"

The congregations sighs with appreciation and applauds.

Sam Goldstein, the entrepreneur and investor, stands and says, "If the Rabbi will stay on here, I'll personally double his salary, and also establish a foundation to guarantee the college education of his children!"

More sighs and loud applause.

Sadie Goldfarb, age 80, stands, and announces with a smile, "If the Rabbi stays, I'll give him sex!"

There is total silence.

The Rabbi, blushing, asks her, "Mrs. Goldfarb, whatever possessed you to say that?" Sadie's husband is now trying to hide, holding his forehead with the palm of his hand.

Sadie answers, "Well, I just asked my husband how we could help, and he said, 'Screw the Rabbi.'"
 
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