GopherM
Darwin was right
Dear USDA Secretary:
My friend Jerry, who lives up the hollow, just received a check from the government for not raising hogs. So I want to get into the "not raising hogs" business. As I see it, the hardest part of this program will be keeping an accurate inventory of how many hogs I haven't raised.
Now, these hogs I will not raise will not eat approximately 100,000 bushels of corn. I understand you pay farmers for not raising corn.
In view of these circumstances, the government will consider me unemployed, so I plan to file for unemployment benefits and food stamps as well as the farm subsidy for not raising hogs and corn.
Gratefully yours,
Farmer John
P.S. Are there any "not raising chickens" programs?
Shoot, if my wife can get money for not growing tulips then I wouldn't have to go back to work after I retire next week.
My friend Jerry, who lives up the hollow, just received a check from the government for not raising hogs. So I want to get into the "not raising hogs" business. As I see it, the hardest part of this program will be keeping an accurate inventory of how many hogs I haven't raised.
Now, these hogs I will not raise will not eat approximately 100,000 bushels of corn. I understand you pay farmers for not raising corn.
In view of these circumstances, the government will consider me unemployed, so I plan to file for unemployment benefits and food stamps as well as the farm subsidy for not raising hogs and corn.
Gratefully yours,
Farmer John
P.S. Are there any "not raising chickens" programs?
Shoot, if my wife can get money for not growing tulips then I wouldn't have to go back to work after I retire next week.