What if the President didn't pardon the Thanksgiving turkey?

[Tonio]

Ellicott City, Md.: So when they pardon the turkey, what do they end up eating for the White House thanksgiving dinner?

Gene Weingarten: Good question. This reminds me of something. Every year, some poor schmuck reporter at the Style Section is forced to cover the Turkey Pardon. The assignment usually goes to the newest feature writer. The last year of Clinton’s presidency, I wanted to cover it. I even wrote the lede in advance. It had Clinton whipping out a cleaver, and as second graders and dignitaries watched in horror, he lopped the turkeys head clean off, lecturing the kids about how politics is an evil, vicious business and making fun of them for weeping at the death of a bird when Washington gleefully destroys people and their reputations over nothing.

Then it would have an asterisk...I’d explain at the bottom that this was fiction, and that the real event was too boring to report.

I wasn’t assigned to cover it, for some reason.

 

[vraiblonde]

I have a question:

What is the purpose of "pardoning" a Thanksgiving turkey?

 

[tlatchaw]

Each year one member of congress gets a free pass (Hey, they're all turkeys!).

 

[Lucy]

Originally posted by vraiblonde
I have a question:

What is the purpose of "pardoning" a Thanksgiving turkey?

It is representative of our government. Millions get screwed just because they are who they are and a couple of people get off because they have friends in high places.

 

[Bruzilla]

Originally posted by vraiblonde
I have a question:

What is the purpose of "pardoning" a Thanksgiving turkey?

It's a very weak attempt at giving the nation a "warm and fuzzy."

 

[vraiblonde]

Hum. Okay, one more question: what happens to a pardoned Thanksgiving turkey? Does he live out his life with free food and harem girls? Pr does he just become a Butterball for Christmas?

 

[tlatchaw]

Originally posted by vraiblonde
Hum. Okay, one more question: what happens to a pardoned Thanksgiving turkey? Does he live out his life with free food and harem girls? Pr does he just become a Butterball for Christmas?

I think they send him to a petting zoo where PETA can protest his "inhumane" treatment.