Why? Why? Why?

SAB

Shirley
Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are almost dead?

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they already know there is not enough money?

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars; but have to check when you say the paint is still wet?

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard?

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him?

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'?

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white?

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale?

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized?

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance?

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try?

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures?

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?'

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over?

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat?

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes?
 

twinoaks207

Having Fun!
In response to SAB...

Why do we press harder on a remote control when we know the batteries are almost dead? We are hoping that the electrical charges in our bodies will transfer through our fingers and resurrect the batteries (tin foil hats are great conductors of electricity).

Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they already know there is not enough money? Must be related to that mysterious bank money magic that let's them take billions for bailouts & keep it "just in case".

Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars; but have to check when you say the paint is still wet? Space shuttles are expensive & in short supply. Soap and water are cheap and plentiful.

Why doesn't Tarzan have a beard? The vines shave the hair off every day.

Why does Superman stop bullets with his chest, but ducks when you throw a revolver at him? Silly person -- guns KILL people!

Why do Kamikaze pilots wear helmets? They don't want to get wind-blown hair.

Whose idea was it to put an 'S' in the word 'lisp'? Someone with a wicked sense of humor.

If people evolved from apes, why are there still apes? To remind us where we come from, lest we forget. Where are the bananas?

Why is it that no matter what color bubble bath you use the bubbles are always white? This one is just racist!

Is there ever a day that mattresses are not on sale? According to the court that passed judgement against the Hecht company department stores years ago --- no!

Why do people constantly return to the refrigerator with hopes that something new to eat will have materialized? We're waiting on the refridgerator fairy so the cheesecake calories don't count!

Why do people keep running over a string a dozen times with their vacuum cleaner, then reach down, pick it up, examine it, then put it down to give the vacuum one more chance? We must not have pushed the vacuum hard enough the first 12 times (see the remote control answer above)!

Why is it that no plastic bag will open from the end on your first try? It's the same law that controls dropping a piece of buttered bread (lands butter side down more often than not!).

How do those dead bugs get into those enclosed light fixtures? The refridgerator fairy helps them (she's a sneaky one!).

When we are in the supermarket and someone rams our ankle with a shopping cart then apologizes for doing so, why do we say, 'It's all right?' Well, it isn't all right, so why don't we say, 'That really hurt, why don't you watch where you're going?' What?!! You want us to tell the truth?

Why is it that whenever you attempt to catch something that's falling off the table you always manage to knock something else over? Buttered bread principle again.

In winter why do we try to keep the house as warm as it was in summer when we complained about the heat? Someone somewhere passed a law that says we must always have something to complain about. I think we should compain about them!

How come you never hear father-in-law jokes? Let's see, men make mother-in-law jokes which means that women would make father-in-law jokes. Obviously, women are smarter!


Sorry! I just couldn't resist doing this. Being at home sick all week has turned me into a real smart azz. Actually, it's just lowered my resistance so the real me comes out every now & then. :whistle:

Thanks for posting this initially -- I loved your "why?why? why?" questions!<!-- google_ad_section_end --><NOINDEX>
 

getbent

Thats how them b*tch's R
Why do banks charge a fee on 'insufficient funds' when they already know there is not enough money?

I'd like to know why do they charge the fee when on the same day a deposit is clearing? lol
 
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