Will I live to 80?

Mike

F*** Socialism!
I recently picked a new primary care doctor. After two visits and exhaustive lab tests, he said I was doing "fairly well" for my age (I just turned 56). A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking him, "Do you think I'll live to be 80?"

He asked, "Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer or wine?"

"Oh no," I replied, "I'm not doing drugs, either!"

Then he asked, "Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?"

I said, "Not much. . .my former doctor said that all red meat is very unhealthy!"

"Do you spend a lot of time in the sun, like playing golf, sailing, hiking or bicycling?"

"No, I don't," I said.

He asked, "Do you gamble, drive fast cars or have a lot of sex?"

"No," I said.

He looked at me and said, "Then, why do you even care?"
 
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