One of the things...
...I really love about soccer is the acting.
I mean, the NBA gives us some pretty good flops and phantom collisions and players writhing on the floor in search of sympathy or at least an Oscar nomination, but man, international football?
Fugetabodit. This guys are the stuff when they think they can get a foul call. The NBA don't bring out no stretchers. In soccer, you get 'fouled' and you just flop around like a fish out of water. The guy who 'got' you comes over, sincerely asking about your health, your teammates stroll over and lead your attacker away as though he is your drunk uncle at the wedding and the ref walks over, looks down at you as though you've just shat yourself and non-chalantly calls for a stretcher. 4 medics comes running out and however long it melodramatically takes you to get comfortable and stop writhing, then they trot you off. All the while you must keep an arm across your face as though in birth giving agony. It is actually to hide your smile.
Then, after a few minutes on the sideline, during which some miracle must have occurred, you either wait for the ref to allow you back on if HE called for the stretcher or when you feel like it if your teammates called for it, you trot back on the pitch.
Wonderful theater.
