Your Princess Is in Another Castle

Misfit

Lawful neutral
http://www.thedailybeast.com/articl...r-castle-misogyny-entitlement-and-nerds.html#



So what happens to nerdy guys who keep finding out that the princess they were promised is always in another castle? When they “do everything right,” they get good grades, they get a decent job, and that wife they were promised in the package deal doesn’t arrive? When the persistent passive-aggressive Nice Guy act fails, do they step it up to elaborate Steve-Urkel-esque stalking and stunts? Do they try elaborate Revenge of the Nerds-style ruses? Do they tap into their inner John Galt and try blatant, violent rape?

Do they buy into the “pickup artist” snake oil—started by nerdy guys, for nerdy guys—filled with techniques to manipulate, pressure and in some cases outright assault women to get what they want? Or when that doesn’t work, and they spend hours a day on sites bitching about how it doesn’t work, like Elliot Rodger’s hangout “PUAHate.com,” sometimes, do they buy some handguns, leave a manifesto on the Internet and then drive off to a sorority house to murder as many women as they can?

I’ve heard it from acquaintances, I’ve heard it from friends. I’ve heard it come out of my own mouth, in moments of anger and weakness.

It’s the same motivation that makes a guy in college stalk a girl, leave her unsolicited gifts and finally when she tells him to quit it makes him leave an angry post about her “shallowness” and “cruelty” on Facebook. It’s the same motivation that makes guys rant about “fake cosplay girls” at cons and how much he hates them for their vain, “teasing” ways. The one that makes a guy suffering career or personal problems turn on his wife because it’s her job to “support” him by patching up all the holes in his life. The one that makes a wealthy entrepreneur hit his girlfriend 117 times, on camera, for her infidelity, and then after getting off with a misdemeanor charge still put up a blog post casting himself as the victim.

And now that motivation has led to six people dead and 13 more injured, in broad daylight, with the killer leaving a 140-page rant and several YouTube videos describing exactly why he did it. No he-said-she-said, no muffled sounds through the dorm ceiling, no “Maybe he has other issues.” The fruits of our culture’s ingrained misogyny laid bare for all to see.

And yet. When this story broke, the initial mainstream coverage only talked about “mental illness,” not misogyny, a line that people are now fervently exhorting us to stick to even after the manifesto’s contents were revealed. Yet another high-profile tech CEO resignation ensued when the co-founder of Rap Genius decided Rodger’s manifesto was a hilarious joke.

People found one of the girls Rodger was obsessed with and began questioning if her “bullying” may have somehow triggered his rage. And, worst of all, he has fan pages on Facebook that still haven’t been taken down, filled with angry frustrated men singing his praises and seriously suggesting that the onus is on women to offer sex to men to keep them from going on rampages.

So, a question, to my fellow male nerds:

What the f#ck is wrong with us?
 

migtig

aka Mrs. Giant
A lack of social mores. Nerds aren't forced out into social settings anymore. They aren't forced to play sports against their will anymore. Nobody drags their kids to church. Everybody commuincates via message boards and not in person.

If you don't learn early the proper way to socially interact and what the social boundaries are, then you are left to be influenced by what is not reality.

But that guy was crazy. And this is what happens when we shut all the insane asylums in America. There's nowhere for the nuts to be but among us all.
 

Misfit

Lawful neutral
A lack of social mores. Nerds aren't forced out into social settings anymore. They aren't forced to play sports against their will anymore. Nobody drags their kids to church. Everybody commuincates via message boards and not in person.

If you don't learn early the proper way to socially interact and what the social boundaries are, then you are left to be influenced by what is not reality.

But that guy was crazy. And this is what happens when we shut all the insane asylums in America. There's nowhere for the nuts to be but among us all.

:yay:

I had no idea what that article was about when I clicked on it but I read it all and I thought it was interesting.


:nerd:
 

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
Patron
Toxick nailed it in a previous thread:

When I say a "Nice Guy", I'm not talking about you pathetic little worms that whine and complain because pretty girls date so-called a-holes when they could be dating a clingy little douche geekboy like you. NEWSFLASH: You're not nearly as nice as you think you are, and those a-holes are not as a-holey as you think they are. I should also point out that when I say "nice guy" there is some emphasis on the word "guy".

Nerds are hawt. Smart guys are ####alicious. Clingy little douche geekboys, not so much.

Freaking Stephen Hawking gets the honies and he's paralyzed from the neck down. So don't tell me geeks don't get laid.
 

GURPS

INGSOC
PREMO Member
But that guy was crazy. And this is what happens when we shut all the insane asylums in America. There's nowhere for the nuts to be but among us all.

the dude was in therapy since he was 8 ....
 

GURPS

INGSOC
PREMO Member
Lusting after women “out of our league” was what we did. And those unattainable hot girls would always inevitably reject us because they didn’t understand our intellectual interest in science fiction and comic books and would instead date ####### jocks.

This was inevitable, and our only hope was to be unyieldingly persistent until we “earned” a chance with these women by “being there” for them until they saw the error of their ways. (The thought of just looking for women who shared our interests was a foreign one, since it took a while for the media to decide female geeks existed. The Big Bang Theory didn’t add Amy and Bernadette to its main cast until Season 4, in 2010.)

This is, to put it mildly, a problematic attitude to grow up with. Fixating on a woman from afar and then refusing to give up when she acts like she’s not interested is, generally, something that ends badly for everyone involved. But it’s a narrative that nerds and nerd media kept repeating.

I’m not breaking new ground by saying this. It’s been said very well over and over and over again.

And I’m not condemning guys who get frustrated, or who have unrequited crushes. And I’m not condemning any of these shows or movies.

And yet…


Simple, you interact with the girls that will talk to you ... leave Barbi to the worthless jocks

been there, done that ... and I got laid in High School BFD :shrug: [only it was video games and Dungeons and Dragons in the 1980's]

maybe it is something about more recent times ... no one was talking about offing some evil jock concubine, just because she would not give you the time of day
 

Hank

my war
Simple, you interact with the girls that will talk to you ... leave Barbi to the worthless jocks

been there, done that ... and I got laid in High School BFD :shrug: [only it was video games and Dungeons and Dragons in the 1980's]

maybe it is something about more recent times ... no one was talking about offing some evil jock concubine, just because she would not give you the time of day

I think I saw you in that movie, Revenge of the Nerds! How far can you throw a javelin?
 
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