I am unreasonably angry

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
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I just saw the trailer for the movie "Jack Reacher". Imagine my anguish when I saw that Tom Cruise will be playing the title role.

I wish Tom Cruise would die already. It's not enough that his cheesy mug is all over the tabloids, but now he will be playing one of my favorite fictional characters. Whose freaking asinine idea was this??? I want to beat them with a ball bat until their head is the consistency of strawberry jam.

TOM CRUISE IS NOT REACHER!!!

And seriously, aren't we all sick of him by now? Is there anyone left in America who is still a fan? I cannot believe, with all the hot new (and established) actors out there, this flake dorkstein fake hetero OLD twit still brings in box office. He should be doing beer commercials in Japan, not starring in US movies.

Ick ick ick!!!

:mad:
 

mAlice

professional daydreamer
Reacher is 6' 5" tall (1.96m) with a 50-inch chest, and weighing between 210 and 250 pounds (100–115 kg). He has ice-blue eyes and dirty blond hair. He has very little body fat, and his muscular physique is completely natural (he reveals in Persuader, he has never been an exercise enthusiast.) He is exceptionally strong but is not a good runner.[2] Reacher's strength is combined with his savant intellect and military training, analyzing his environment and opponents at extremely high processing speeds. He mentally plans his fights using physics in a scientific calculating method, much like Sherlock Holmes. He knows how to break a man's neck with one hand (Bad Luck and Trouble) and kill a villain with a single punch to the head (Running Blind and 61 Hours) or chest (Worth Dying For). In a fight against a 7 foot, 400 lb steroid-using thug (Persuader), Reacher was able to lift his opponent into the air and drop him on his head....nope, not Tom Cruise.

edited to add ~wiki
 

red_explorer

Well-Known Member
:)

Reacher is 6' 5" tall (1.96m) with a 50-inch chest, and weighing between 210 and 250 pounds (100–115 kg). He has ice-blue eyes and dirty blond hair. He has very little body fat, and his muscular physique is completely natural (he reveals in Persuader, he has never been an exercise enthusiast.) He is exceptionally strong but is not a good runner.[2] Reacher's strength is combined with his savant intellect and military training, analyzing his environment and opponents at extremely high processing speeds. He mentally plans his fights using physics in a scientific calculating method, much like Sherlock Holmes. He knows how to break a man's neck with one hand (Bad Luck and Trouble) and kill a villain with a single punch to the head (Running Blind and 61 Hours) or chest (Worth Dying For). In a fight against a 7 foot, 400 lb steroid-using thug (Persuader), Reacher was able to lift his opponent into the air and drop him on his head....nope, not Tom Cruise.

edited to add ~wiki

I dont even know who Reacher is, but I totally completely agree with Vrai. He is washed up, a fraud, insane, sick, and needs to be farmed out to Palm Springs so the aliens can beam him up. And I was a huge Top Gun fan....
 

vraiblonde

Board Mommy
PREMO Member
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Good. I am not the only one who is traumatized by this. One guy said:

I guess Gilbert Gottfried wasn't availible
by magichal (Fri Jul 6 2012 08:30:17)
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This could be the worst casting decision in history!

In this light here are some other suggestions.

Jerry Lewis as James Bond.

Henry Winkler as the Terminator.

Lindsey Lohan as Mother Theresa.

Don Knotts as Batman.

Feel free to add your own

:roflmao:
 

migtig

aka Mrs. Giant
I was extremely upset when I saw the movie preview too. At first I was excited that there would be a Reacher movie (series) but then I saw it was going to star Tom Cruise, and I realized that hollywood is so anti-American that they were out to sabatoge the whole movie, because you can't have Reacher being awesome...not in Amerika.

Tom Cruise is not in any what shape or form, including extra lifts in his shoes, anywhere close to being anything like Reacher.

Lee Child is couching careful language about the selection of Cruise...

There is only a small handful of genuine global male stars. All are great actors—you don't get to be a star if you don't have the chops—but Cruise might well be the best of his generation.

Plus, from an author's point of view, it's more exciting to see a new and fresh vision.

Link

Riggggghhhhtttt....but he's British, so what does he know. :lol:
 
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