Christy
b*tch rocket
And that's the problem with today's parents. "Anything for my kid(s)" means, "anything society will guilt me in to doing because they know better than me".Wenchy said:
Don't get me wrong, I started off where you were. I spent many a sleepless night wondering what I'd done wrong as a parent because some yahoo felt that my kid had ADD/ADHD. Was he effected because I'd had the buttload of vaccinations while I was unknowingly pregnant with him? Did I not have some vitamin I should've while pregnant, did I do something wrong while he was an infant.
I totally bought into the crap that was being fed to me because obviously they must know, they deal with this stuff on a daily basis, they are the "experts". Well I'm here to tell you that they aren't, and they are doing grave damage to your child by subjecting him to all this crap. My best advice is to focus heavily on what it is that makes your child unique and interesting and building your child up with that rather than incessantly focusing on "their problem". And trust me when I tell you that your kid knows everyone is focusing in on "their problem". No kid should be subjected to thinking that they are abnormal. Trust me when I say that all of this stuff he's going to be put through will lower his self worth beyond belief.
Don't make a big fcuking deal of it all, kids are desperately looking for acceptance and worth from the adults around them and putting him through a slew of specialists will crush them.
My kid is dyslexic and sucks in a big way when it comes to spelling and writing, but guess what, as an adult, (and as a kid) I suck at math, I'm lucky to be able to add and subtract. Does that make me "abnormal"? No, it's just not one of my strong points, and that is what I stress to my son, is that we ALL have areas that we are good at and areas that we really really suck at. :shrug:
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Wenchy
Guest
Christy,
Point taken. I have been standing on your soapbox for 3 years now. Times have changed, and my child needs help. I never wanted it to come to this, but it has.
Point taken. I have been standing on your soapbox for 3 years now. Times have changed, and my child needs help. I never wanted it to come to this, but it has.
Wenchy said:
Good God! All FOUR of my kids have ADD! And so does Larry! And - OMG - so do I!!!!!!!
It's an epidemic!!!! Somebody call John Kerry!!!!!!!
I'm with Christy. ADD is bullshit. Some teacher tried to tell me that our youngest should be tested for ADD. Had me worked up for a minute or two until she told me what the "symptoms" were. Chats with friends instead of doing classwork, forgets her homework, doesn't start projects until the last minute, then rushes to get them done on time,
They call it ADD - I call it "Lazy Teacher/Lazy Parent" syndrome. Raising kids is too much trouble, so you drug 'em. Dur.
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Kizzy
Guest
I think I have long term memory loss. People will say, don't you remember when I seriously wonder if I was even there. I use to think it was them, but I think I actually don't remember things that happened awhile ago.
People will say, don't you remember when I seriously wonder if I was even there. I use to think it was them, but I think I actually don't remember things that happened awhile ago.
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Kizzy
Guest
I’m going to throw out some information that I am a little ashamed of, because my son’s failure makes me feel like a failure as a parent.
This past year he got his interim report and was nearly failing every subject. Because he switched counties and of course schools this year, I wondered if the curriculum was at a higher level than where he was before.
My son wanted me to pull him out of his teacher’s class and get him in another teacher’s class, because he felt she was too mean. 3 students have already been assigned to other classrooms, but I told him no, especially, after a very lengthy discussion with the teacher, principle and his science teacher. He is on level, actually above level, so this boiled down to sheer and utter laziness on his part. Plus, lets face it, in the real world, you have to work or be supervised by people that you don’t necessarily like, but nonetheless you have a job to get done. I asked about ADD, also asked the doctor about ADD, and filled out the questioner, and felt that I could have answered yes to many of the questions and been easily considered ADD. He is a brilliant kid but lazy and I declined medication after research and discussion. One of my doctors said that in this day and age everything moves so fast, video games, TV, movies, etc. etc., so kids today are having a more difficult time staying focused in school because the teacher doesn’t move that fast. Humm, that makes sense, it really does, and after discussing the matter with the doctor, teacher and those whose opinions are significant in my life, I knew what I needed to do.
Well, I turned into a tyrant. I have become my father, even though I swore when I had kids I would not be a parent who yells and punishes constantly. But looking back, it worked for me. We do live in a touchy, feely society, trying to find medical diagnoses for character flaws. When kids hit the age of 8 (typically 3rd grade), they are expected to take responsibility for getting their assignments done without constant teacher involvement. Most kids have problems with this, it is the first time they don’t have somebody standing over them telling them what to do and many feel lost. The first few weeks of constantly riding him, he was miserable, crying, upset, furious when he didn’t do something right the 1st time, I made him redo it again and again and again until it was correct. It was hard to sit back and watch, but I had a great deal of support behind me.
Well guess what, he is bringing home A’s and B’s and the teacher has noticed a major difference. I think he is catching on, take your time, do it right the 1st time and you will not have to do it again.
This past year he got his interim report and was nearly failing every subject. Because he switched counties and of course schools this year, I wondered if the curriculum was at a higher level than where he was before.
My son wanted me to pull him out of his teacher’s class and get him in another teacher’s class, because he felt she was too mean. 3 students have already been assigned to other classrooms, but I told him no, especially, after a very lengthy discussion with the teacher, principle and his science teacher. He is on level, actually above level, so this boiled down to sheer and utter laziness on his part. Plus, lets face it, in the real world, you have to work or be supervised by people that you don’t necessarily like, but nonetheless you have a job to get done. I asked about ADD, also asked the doctor about ADD, and filled out the questioner, and felt that I could have answered yes to many of the questions and been easily considered ADD. He is a brilliant kid but lazy and I declined medication after research and discussion. One of my doctors said that in this day and age everything moves so fast, video games, TV, movies, etc. etc., so kids today are having a more difficult time staying focused in school because the teacher doesn’t move that fast. Humm, that makes sense, it really does, and after discussing the matter with the doctor, teacher and those whose opinions are significant in my life, I knew what I needed to do.
Well, I turned into a tyrant. I have become my father, even though I swore when I had kids I would not be a parent who yells and punishes constantly. But looking back, it worked for me. We do live in a touchy, feely society, trying to find medical diagnoses for character flaws. When kids hit the age of 8 (typically 3rd grade), they are expected to take responsibility for getting their assignments done without constant teacher involvement. Most kids have problems with this, it is the first time they don’t have somebody standing over them telling them what to do and many feel lost. The first few weeks of constantly riding him, he was miserable, crying, upset, furious when he didn’t do something right the 1st time, I made him redo it again and again and again until it was correct. It was hard to sit back and watch, but I had a great deal of support behind me.
Well guess what, he is bringing home A’s and B’s and the teacher has noticed a major difference. I think he is catching on, take your time, do it right the 1st time and you will not have to do it again.
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Kizzy
Guest
elaine said:
Oh yeah, I also threw this into the changes, limited sugar snacks.
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geminigrl
Guest
That was a wonderful post, you have a lot of courage and you have done a good job, keep up the good work.Kizzy said:
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Kizzy
Guest
cattitude said:Who are you
Oh that I know, plus, my address, my phone number, and those forums members I want to remember. Everything else gets tossed.
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Kizzy
Guest
Pete said:WOWwho gave you those ideas? I bet they are a genious
It pains me to admit when you are right. 
Good for you, Kiz! And good for Christy and any other parent that decided to actually expend some energy rather than just feed their kids drugs.
We will continue working with him in his journal writing and his assignments. He came up to me yesterday and hugged me and said that this is the happiest he has ever felt. 
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Wenchy
Guest
vraiblonde said:
Excuse me? I started this thread to get advice. I've received a lot of advice, and am taking everything into consideration. Elaine: I have monitored my son's diet for the last 3 years, and appreciate the input. Every child is different, and my son is not responding to behavior modification or a change in diet.
Now to whoever said this. If you care about people, you will hope that he only has ADHD. Now, this is the only karmic comment that has pissed me off. Call me a whore, dumbass or whatever. Never say this: And if you do, have the friggin courage to sign it.
(red) ADD or Adhd as I've see... 10-30-2004 11:51 AM why are you discussing this? looks like you've resigned yourself to buying into societal hype. lucky kid.
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Wenchy, you haven't said one thing that makes me think your son is anything but normal.Wenchy said: